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Dec 16, 2008 - 06:24 PM |
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Depressed |
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Disclaimer: Don't read this journal entry if you don't want to know about all of my little problems. I needed a place to vent, so don't feel too obliged to read this if it depresses you - I don't need to go around making other people depressed, too.
Some days I feel like I don't actually have any friends. Other people will perhaps pretend to pay attention, be interested in what I have to say, but I don't really think anyone here at university really actually cares about me. Maybe I need to be more outgoing, but I really doubt that's going to happen anytime within the next decade, so now what? I realize that I am not actually part of any group, just a drifter floating around to whoever is willing to tolerate me at the time. No one asks how I am, only noticing my mood when I happen to post it on Facebook. I think that my family and friends from home are the only people who actually care about me.
I found out that my current roommate is moving down the hall next semester, the reason I was given being that it was my fault for not cleaning up my stuff. I'm not all that surprised, but when I think about it, I really don't think I was messy enough to make another person decide that they can't live in the same room as me anymore. I guess I wasn't paying enough attention to what he needed or something?
If you are still reading, thanks. I know that I'm putting far too much weight on trivial things, and that things maybe aren't as bad as they look right now, but this is just how my brain works. I'll probably be fine tomorrow, I always am.
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