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Misogynyst Gynecologist's

"Remember that you must behave in life as at a dinner party. Is anything brought around to you? Put out your hand and take your share with moderation. Does it pass by you? Don't stop it. Is it not yet come? Don't stretch your desire towards it, but wait till it reaches you. Do this with regard to children, to a wife, to public posts, to riches, and you will eventually be a worthy partner of the feasts of the gods. And if you don't even take the things which are set before you, but are able even to reject them, then you will not only be a partner at the feasts of the gods, but also of their empire." - The Enchiridion, Epictetus

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Aug 8, 2012 - 02:53 PM

RIP Bill

RIP Bill. You were the elder statesmen of my department. You were one of the most fun people I've ever met in my life. You were also totally senile for the seven years I worked with you. Fond memories include:

*The time we saw a fox cross the street and if you asked if it was a deer.

*All the times you stole food from parties and stuck them in your pockets, only to give them to us an hour later. Turkey and cheese on a keiser bun *must* be more delicious when its warmed over, gooey and covered in pocket lint.

*Eating an amount of candy that could only be called superhuman... and then throwing the wrappers behind the table and the mess of sugar ants that would reappear ever year.

*Your oft-repeated rhyme "Coca-cola hits the spot... but I prefer Pepsi" as well as greeting us with a dignified "HOW WHITE MAN" every morning and occasionally dancing in a circle like a Native American on pow-wow.

*Your gentle, child-like nature and great humor ... which was occasionally broken when you were arguing with Joe and then the swear words would start flying thicker than any combination of George Carlin HBO specials.

*The embarrassing times where you gave Nazi salutes to people or introduced yourself as "Chief Big Peen" to another department.

*Rolling down your car window, shaking your fist at people to "GET THE F***ING HELL OUT OF MY WAY, YOU SONUVAB*TCH" and then honking the horn... when you were driving on sidewalks.

*The time you full-on, behind-the-back prison shanked the mailman with a banana. For no discernible reason.

I've missed you since you retired, Bill. You were one hell of a great guy.

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