Surprise, your aunt's really an uncle!

So I'm 20 years old, and most of my father's family's been living overseas in Canada my whole life (only met them twice, once was for a year though). I keep hearing about some grim secret about my auntie Jen, but no one cares to tell me what it is. Finally I ask my older sister and hear that she used to be a guy, and had a freaking sex change in the 80s, obviously her/his name was Jan.

Now to be honest, I have no idea how to react, first of all, I know nothing about my family. I've always looked at them as a bunch of boring squares, and now I feel like I'm ready for the Jerry Springer show. I don't even know who to talk to anymore, or how or what to talk about.

So just out of curiosity... How would you react? Ever experienced anything similar?

(By the way, if you're wondering, I'm not making this up).

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I'm actually studying transsexuality in my Gender class right now.

It's hard to tell how someone would react to it unless they've actually experienced it. I know that I certainly wouldnt know how to react, especially if I've never really seen said relative. I probably wouldnt be too preturbed by it, if that were the case. If it were someone more familiar though, I may be a bit disturbed, but certainly not to the point of counting them out of the family. One has to imagine how hard it is for them.

Transsexuality actually isnt that rare at all... in the United States there's estimated to be 40,000 transgendered male-to-females, and that only counts the ones who have already had the surgery. Yet alone the ones that can't afford to have it, or just prefer horomones. That makes the condition more common than cleft palate and multiple sclerosis.

Those numbers and facts came from a book I'd highly recommend you read, called She's not There, by Jennifer (formally named James) Boylan. It's a breathtaking book about a man who is a transsexual, and shows his transition from loving father and husband to the 'Maddy' (combination mom and daddy) of the family. Its a real eye opener.

Sorry if this was a lot, but having just finished the book myself, I have a new view of the transsexual world. Give it a try, and good luck.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I would initially be surprised. Being curious as to why, I'd ask them. If they gave me a good answer, then I'll accept. Otherwise, it's alright.

Accepting them though may take weeks.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Well, if I find out that my aunt is really my 'uncle' today..... I guess I'd be VERY surprised, because my aunt has always been pretty hot >.> (she's still in really good shape even she's in her mid 40s). Like Terminus I'd probably ask her/him(? D:) a lot of questions like what when where why how?! I wouldn't dislike her/him (??!) because of it though.

Speaking of which there is actually a Taiwanese actress who was originally a guy , but changed sex to a female :x now he/she (god this is confusing) is married with another guy.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I'd be surprised, but it's not like they're a different person then they were before. Becides, who the hell are you that you even think you have the right to object to your aunt's surgery? Fucking kids don't have any manners these days. It really isn't any of your damn business, you should be glad they told you the big secret rather than fuss about how you can't look at them in the same way.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by a lurker

I'd be surprised, but it's not like they're a different person then they were before. Becides, who the hell are you that you even think you have the right to object to your aunt's surgery? Fucking kids don't have any manners these days. It really isn't any of your damn business, you should be glad they told you the big secret rather than fuss about how you can't look at them in the same way.

You don't really seem to realise how such changes in ones own family affects a person. Now there's no point in me objecting to it, and so I don't. But the fact that someone in my own family would do that sort of thing, and that my closest family would keep that away from me for so many years is what I had a hard time accepting at first.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Eh, it wouldn't bother me. I'd actually be really curious and start asking all sorts of innocent but terribly awkward questions.

What's the objection exactly? That someone a step away from your immediate family is a deviant? Ohnoes.

FELIPE NO

Your situation seems particularly interesting, because it sounds like you haven't had much of a relationship with your aunt, seeing as how she's been overseas most of your life (right?). That means that it would even less important for you to know.

I would ascribe your family 'keeping it from you' to waiting until you were old enough and mature enough to be able to think it through - the fact that you're trying to figure out how you should react instead of just reacting lends credence to this. I say let the natural emotions you feel run their course, so long as you come back to the fact that your aunt is still your aunt, you just know more about her now. She hasn't changed since you found out, you just know her better now. If you have enough of a relationship with her, you might consider talking with her about it. If not, you might consider talking with your dad about it.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?