I never though...

Originally Posted by Gumby

that I would lose a friend over a difference in political views. She believes that illegals have a right to be here, I told her they were criminals, she called me a racist, I told her I wasn't even busted out my webster's dictionary unabridged edition and proved that my actions were not racist... now she doesn't want to be my friend anymore. Fucked up no?

So has anyone else ever lost a friend over something so utterly stupid that it boggles your mind? Please explain.

i agree with you. i believe that if tons of people can come over to the US legally, then it's doable. People who sneak across the border and such are rather lazy, and don't want to work for their citizenship. Almost my entire family came here legally, and i know the shit that they had to go through, but in the end, i believe they all thought it was worth it. It's not like they were rich or anything either. I'm lucky in that i was born here, and am automatically a citizen. i don't think ur being a racist. ^^;;

but yea, i've also lost a friend through some pretty stupid crap, and even till this day, i don't know why we stopped talking. (maybe if someone here knows or has any idea, enlighten me please).
i think it began when one of my friend's parents were getting a divorce. Of couse, she was extremely upset about it, and that's completely understandable. We all sympathized with her, and tried cheering her up. Except after four or five months, my friend was still moping every single day, and conversations would go something like this.
me: "so how are you today?"
her: "o...peeeeachy...." (sarcasm there)
me: "o my...what's wrong?"
her: "...stuff..."
me: "what...kind of stuff?"
her: "just....stuff..."
me: "..."

it doesn't really help if i try to help someone and they don't tell me squat. what can i do to help then? but surprisingly, tne problem wasn't her (i'll call her ann), it was another of my friends...i just call her sally for now...and there is another girl in our group, i'll say mandy.

so after 4-5 months of dragging stuff out, mandy and i start getting slightly annoyed with ann's mopeyness becuase it's EVERY SINGLE DAY that we have to deal with her. it was as though we were trying to help a drowning person and thowing them a rope, but instead of taking the rope, the person just said "no, let me drown". anyways, mandy and i find out later that ann has been telling sally EVERYTHING. so we're slightly upset about this because we want to help and ann won't let us. We as sally what she's been telling her, but sally just keeps answering as vaguely as possible...and then sally starts phasing us out and i don't know why. keeping a conversation going with her became near impossible cuz it would go something like this:

me: "how was your weekend?"
sally: "ok"
me: "read any cool books lately that i should borrow later?
sally: "not really"
me: "...well i'm up to this really suspensful part in (insert title of a book)...i think (w/e) is going to happen"
sally: "ok"
me: "...ok...did u play any more of (insert title of game)?"
sally: "not really"

OMGGGGG...i think there's tons of stuff that she could have said in that dialog up there, but i really got the feeling that she just didn't want to talk to me...and i dunno why. so after a while, i just stopped trying because most conversations would go like that.

anyways, this post has gone on way too long...but that's one experience where i lost a friend.

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Originally Posted by a lurker

You mean racism is more insignificant to you than homosexuality?

No, the other way around actually. As long as it's not *my* race that's being attacked, why would I care what my friends think of other races? But I couldn't be a friend with a lesbian. I don't know how to deal with that!

Originally Posted by a lurker

You also mean to tell me that racism is blatant while homosexuality is sneaky?

In the case I mentioned, it was. But I'm not saying it's the case always. You can't really know someone is racist until they have to give an opinion on the subject, and even then...

Like that about the illegal immigrants. Just not agreeing with them for sneaking into the US doesn't make the person a racist. It's just easier to accuse someone of racism since the illegal immigrants happen to be mestizos. To do that, it's a poor arguement.

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Umma

No, the other way around actually. As long as it's not *my* race that's being attacked, why would I care what my friends think of other races? But I couldn't be a friend with a lesbian. I don't know how to deal with that!

That's what I said. You feel homosexuality is more significant as a personality flaw than racism.

Originally Posted by Umma

In the case I mentioned, it was.

You knew her for two years when you were both teenagers, it's not like fourteen year olds really discuss being lesbians in a community that breeds people like you.

Actually, let me ask you something. You didn't say how you found out. Did she just tell you or did she feel you up or something? How sneaky was this girl?

You are so vile. I want to make that clear.

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Originally Posted by a_lurker

That's what I said. You feel homosexuality is more significant as a personality flaw than racism.

To be a close friend of someone with either of those traits, yeah. I feel that way.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

You knew her for two years when you were both teenagers, it's not like fourteen year olds really discuss being lesbians in a community that breeds people like you.

No no. We were 14 when we met. It was one of my friends who found out about her being homosexual... kind of, but then confronted her and she admitted it. I was 17 at the time. I *might* have overreacted back then; we're not close friends anymore because of how I started being around her after that.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

Did she just tell you or did she feel you up or something?

That's the kind of thing I'm afraid she might do.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Umma

To be a close friend of someone with either of those traits, yeah. I feel that way.



No no. We were 14 when we met. It was one of my friends who found out about her being homosexual... kind of, but then confronted her and she admitted it. I was 17 at the time. I *might* have overreacted back then; we're not close friends anymore because of how I started being around her after that.



That's the kind of thing I'm afraid she might do.

This is a rare opportunity indeed. May I ask how you justify and rationalize homophobia?

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

It's a natural feeling. I didn't choose to feel this way, I just *do*. Why would I want to distance myself from a friend?

FELIPE NO

There are plenty of reasons to distance yourself from friends. I was just a little surprised that yours was a concern that she might molest you.

Wouldn't that same concern go for guys with whom you are friends as well? Aren't they supposed to be sex crazed, at least as much so as lesbians?

I mean no personal offence, I'm sure a Lurker will give you enough of that. But the mentality is one that I can't figure out. I mean, you more or less said that it was an irrational feeling, so, why let it determine your behaviour instead of working against something that you can't justify?

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by Umma

It's a natural feeling. I didn't choose to feel this way, I just *do*. Why would I want to distance myself from a friend?

Ignorance?

Also, do you maintain friendships with boys?

Double Post:

Originally Posted by PUG1911

Wouldn't that same concern go for guys with whom you are friends as well?

...

I mean no personal offence, I'm sure a Lurker will give you enough of that.

Oh fuck you. Just because that's true, doesn't mean you should steal my question.

This is what I get for not reading other people's replies before replying. Well I'm not editing my original post.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by PUG1911

There are plenty of reasons to distance yourself from friends. I was just a little surprised that yours was a concern that she might molest you.

Ok, that was an exaggeration. Sorry. I forgave her for kissing me once. But since I had a little too much to drink to properly object, I was just pissed off at her for a couple of weeks.

Originally Posted by PUG1911

Wouldn't that same concern go for guys with whom you are friends as well? Aren't they supposed to be sex crazed, at least as much so as lesbians?

Maybe they are, but I know how to handle guys. This other thing, however, is new for me.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

Also, do you maintain friendships with boys?

Yeah, I have two close guy friends. Why?

Originally Posted by PUG1911

I mean, you more or less said that it was an irrational feeling, so, why let it determine your behaviour instead of working against something that you can't justify?

She makes me uncomfortable!

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Because boys will try to kiss you while you're drunk.

It's true. My first two children were born that way.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I had a friend not talk to me for a while because I refused to go to her church with her. Every week she would ask me to go to her church on Sunday and I lied to her and said that I was going with my family. My family is Catholic, but we rarely attend church, but if I were to go that is where I would feel comfortable. I have went to other churches and I just didn't feel right. She wanted me to go so bad, but I just didn't give in, so I was pretty much disowned because of my religion.

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