[DnD] D&D Arena: The Tale of the Piano Duo, Ebony and Ivory

Wanting to close the gap to the tree-bound halfling before killing the little wretch, Ivory steered his blind wolf towards the trees with a sharp tug on the reins. Knowing full well how futile using normal weapons on a swarm was, the old man grabbed an elixir of Dragonbreath from his pack and knocked it back, ready to toast the birds out of the sky.

Wolf moves south as far as possible whilst keeping me within three squares of ravens. Draw elixir of Dragonbreath. Drink elixir of Dragonbreath. Spend Action Point. Fire breath on Ravens

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

5 Dice Rolls Ivory saves

Ivory tries his best to steer his wolf towards the trees, stopping him only to prevent the wagon from crushing Ebony to fine paste.

Unfortunately, with the animal blinded, the path it took was far less than optimal than Ivory would have preferred. The wolf endures ferocious scratching from the ravens, with its master enduring the same ordeal upon entering the ravens' space.

Deciding to down a flask of firewater, the (very liberal) cleric belches fire at the ravens. They flinch, but are otherwise unaffected.

5 damage to Wolf due to Claws and Beaks (Aura 1) at the beginning of its (Ivory's) turn.
5 more damage to Wolf due to Opportunity Attack. It is blinded until the end of the Ravens' next turn.
Ivory is currently blinded and takes 3 poison damage. Cured from poison and slow.
Ravens delay until after Ebony.

Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26), Halfling Prowler (16), Ivory (12)

FELIPE NO

Well, that's rotten luck. I wonder if normal attacks will hurt against them, though...?

Have I marked my quarry yet? If not, mark halfling
Throw and Stab at unkindness
Charge at halfling, running up the fucking tree if necessary I don't give a fuck

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

9 Dice Rolls Secondary attack +8 vs Fort

Lightly scratched by beaks and claws, Ebony launches into his trademark move yet again. Arching his arm back to throw his weapon into the flock, he gets a faceful of claws for the trouble. The little guy is temporarily blinded, but his hand axe finds its mark.

Ebony takes 5 damage from Aura.
Throw and Stab being a ranged attack, Opportunity Attack vs. Ebony. 5 damage, and blinded until end of ravens' next turn.
Critical Hit! Throw and Stab deals (1d6+2+5)/2 = 7 damage to the ravens.

Pivoting on his heel, the ranger designates the prowler as his quarry, and moves his speed directly towards the hiding halfling. Unfortunately, he is out of range, as the prowler is 15 feet up a tree -- and 35 feet away from the kobold.

Climbing trees is possible with Acrobatics. However, you climb at half your speed. So even when running, you are unable to reach him.

Cute as it is, the little kobold ranger is getting too close for the prowler's liking. Signaling his ravens, the prowler instructs them to ground level, while he takes potshots at blinded reptiles too big for their britches. Unable to see to dodge well enough, Ebony gets hit squarely in the chest.

Ivory hit by Unkind Attack: 5 damage and blinded until end of Ravens' next turn.
Ebony hit by Hand Crossbow: 10 damage, and 3 ongoing poison/slowed until save ends both.

Ivory (12), Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26), Halfling Prowler (16)

Jam it back in, in the dark.

The old man laid his hands on his eyes, curing the blindness with a thought before once again belching a gout of flame over the ravens.

Virtue's touch on self to cure blindness, shift north back up the wagon, firebreath on ravens.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Immediate reaction: shared suffering hide armor on the annoying midget
Then, on my turn:
Climb up the tree
Since I'm blinded, I can't really attack that prick too well, but surely I can grapple him and push him out of the tree?

watch Zerg insist that he's open to creative thinking outside of the box, but so unfortunately the prowler just so happens to have tied himself to the tree and so u loos lurks

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

10 Dice Rolls Save halfling from ongoing

Ivory's Paladin training came in handy as he automatically cures himself of blindness. Unfortunately, that didn't seem to improve his aim at all. His Breath of Fire shoots straight up into the air, completely missing the swarm. Clearly, there has to be a trick to it!

Ivory takes 5 aura damage, but is no longer blind.
Wolf takes 5 aura damage.
Fire breath misses again.

Gathering his wits about him, the slowed kobold combines a move and a charge to climb up the tree. He culminates his assault by roughly shoving the prowler out of his perch. The halfling tumbles out of the tree, and lands on the ground with a thud, but miraculously lands on his feet without injury.

Ebony takes 3 poison damage.
His Bull Rush pushes Halfling Prowler out of the tree.
Halfling Prowler would have taken 6 falling damage, but absorbs twenty feet of falling damage thanks to Catfall trait.
Ebony fails to save against slow and poison.

The ravens mercilessly pursue the cleric, merrily clawing and scratching away - drawing blood in the process.

Impressed with the reptile's audacious move, the prowler attempts to replicate what he just did. After all, it was an excellent hiding spot to ambush unwitting victims. Plus, what's sauce for the kobold is sauce for a halfling, right?

Alas, the kobold wasn't as movable as he was. The two small creatures stare at each other for a few seconds. Deciding that switching to melee combat is more prudent, the prowler stashes his hand crossbow and pulls out a short sword from his pack.

Ivory takes 7 damage and is blinded till the end of the ravens' next turn. Bloodied.
Ebony and Wolf are no longer blind.
Halfling takes 3 damage.
Halfling successfully climbs the tree, but fails to dislodge Ebony.
Halfling successfully saves from ongoing damage.

Ivory (12), Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26), Halfling Prowler (16)

How ya doing, buddy?

2 Dice Rolls Bite attack

With the wolf's eyesight restored, it lurched forward towards the halfling, carrying the cart and his master away from the ravens before lunging at the Prowler. The old shifter in the back muttered something about annoying birds under his breath. Nobody heard what he said but it seemed to make him feel better.

Move south five square, wolf bites halfling, Healing Word on self

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6 Dice Rolls Ebony Acrobatics to reduce dmg

Completely disregarding his own safety, Ivory instructs the wolf to head due south. The shifter gets a faceful of beaks and claws as the wagon lurches through the swarm.

5 Aura damage to Ivory.
Opportunity Attack against Ivory (+9 vs Reflex) deals 4+3=7 damage. Blinded until end of Ravens' next turn.
Ivory recovers 12+5+3=20 HP from Healing Word. Not bloodied anymore.

The wolf springs towards the halfling, but misses. Its attack is sufficient to send the branches swaying precariously, knocking both the prowler and Ebony to the ground. The prowler's cat-like agility saves him from injury, while the kobold mitigates his fall with an incredible display of gymnastics.

Ebony takes 9 - ( [19+8]/2 ) = no damage from the fall, and doesn't fall prone.
3 poison damage to Ebony as he begins his turn. Still slowed/poisoned.

Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26), Halfling Prowler (16), Ivory (12)

Hay lurks

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What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

That last fall must've hit me hard (even though I landed on my feet); I swear I could hear a voice! Now, although I ain't much like being told what to do, he did have a point. So I's try it.

Shifty back one square
Move back one square
Hurling Charge at the midget
Basic charge converted to Marauder's Rush

FELIPE NO

11 Dice Rolls Hurt a kobold

The kobold listens to an imaginary voice, and uses his Hurling Charge attack for the very first time ever.

Hurling Charge does 2+6+2=10 damage.
Marauder's Rush does 1+10+1+2=14 damage. Prowler bloodied.
Ebony still slowed and poisoned.

Not so harmless after all, the halfling realizes belatedly as he bleeds like a stuck pig. Bringing up his short sword, he winds back for a retaliatory stab, while his ravens pursue and peck the rotter's partner. The kobold can dish it out, but can he take it?

Unkind Attack: 3+3=6 damage to Ivory. Bloodied; blinded UEONT.
Short Sword: 4+4=8 damage to Ebony. Bloodied.
Being hit comes with a secondary attack, but why bother? Ebony still slowed and poisoned

Ivory (12), Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26), Halfling Prowler (16)

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

2 Dice Rolls Damage

Ivory was getting grumpy. He couldn't stand ravens at the best of time and ravens that blinded and poisoned him was simply taking the piss in his opinion. He staggered back from the birds, hoping that his own unbelieveable misfortune over the last couple of days when it had come to hitting people would at some point transfer to his adversaries. In his blinded and poisoned state, he lost control of his inner wolf and changed into his lycanthrope form almost without realising.

The wolf continued to snap away at the beleagered halfing, the harness impeding him somewhat but doing nothing to lessen his thirst for blood. Grabbing the halfling by the shoulder, the wolf ripped away a large chunk of flesh and devoured it noisily.

Personal shift south, wolf attacks halfling, Longtooth Shifting

It's a hit, yay! 11 damage to Halfling Prowler (I don't think he's prone is he?), Ivory gains regen 2 and adds 2 to all damage rolls until the end of the encounter

Also, I'm sure you remember but the wolf is currently has combat advantage against the halfling. Remind me again what that actually does?

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You know what I like? running into things.

Shifty back one square
Move back one square
Basic charge a Marauder's Rush on that little twerp

There's nowhere I can't reach.

7 Dice Rolls Does Ebony save?

The wolf chews a chunk of halfling prowler meat in retaliation for its master's continued death by a thousand unkind cuts.

5 damage to Ivory from Aura.
11 damage to Prowler from Bite.

Stepping back from his quarry, the kobold looses its fearsome Marauder's Rush. Luck is not with the little guy. The ranger's murderous charge rips him clean in two. With the prowler's death, Ebony experiences a surge of joy that immediately clears his veins of poison and lethargy.

3 poison damage to Ebony.
Second Chance fails. Really badly
Halfling prowler suffers TERRIBLE TERRIBLE DAMAGE over twice his current HP of 11. Dies.
Ebony saves from poison and slow.

Eager to avenge their fallen master, the ravens go on a rampage, and swirl around the cleric, completely blotting out the sun.

4 damage to Ivory. Blind until further notice.

Ivory (12), Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26)

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

1 Die Roll buuuuuurn

Not wishing to get pecked as he ran away, the old wolf burped up a gout of flame over the increasingly annoying birds.

Firebreath on birds

Ha ha, eat that bitches. Don't forget Ivory has regen 2 at the moment, Zerg.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Third time's the charm: old man Ivory's whiskeybreath tears its way through the swarm, dropping a substantial number of smoldering ravens onto the wooden wagon. The swarm is now at half strength.

Ivory regenerates 2 and takes 5 aura damage.
Critical hit! The swarm receives 18 damage and is bloodied.

Swirling wildly, the unkindness disperses into numerous individual birds, moving too fast for anyone to target.

Scattering of Feathers triggered. The swarm cannot be attacked until it reforms.

Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26), Ivory (12)

I was speaking idiomatically.

uh....

second wind on account'a being bloodied
scratch ass

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

1 Die Roll Unkind Attack vs Ebony

Ebony scratches his ass, releasing endorphins which sooth the pain he suffered during the encounter.

Alas, respite was fleeting. A few seconds after, the ravens worked themselves into a frenzy, gathering right next to the ranger and the wolf.

Ebony dodges the attack nimbly, but is forced to close his eyes to protect them from being pecked.

Ebony is blinded so long as he occupies a square the swarm is occupying.
Ivory is no longer blind.

Ivory (12), Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26)

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2 Dice Rolls Extra healing

The ravens re-convened and straight away started harassing the young kobold. With the wagon at rest, the old man jogged forward, hopping over the front to get within breath range of the angry birds before blowing a gout of flame upwards at them. He swore under his breath, which made him feel better, again.

Move south to stand one square south of the front of the wagon, flame breath on birds (Angled up to miss all my allies), healing word on self

How ya doing, buddy?

I.... I don't know what to do. How do you kill a flock? Well... we're in a forest; I know what Smokey Ye Old Bear says about me and forest fires.

Plus, it's a dry season...

gather up as many sticks as I can reach into a pile right next to the treeline
shifty back one space
shift back another space, so I'm not adjacent to the flock either

Jam it back in, in the dark.

4 Dice Rolls Damage

Angling up to incinerate the ravens but not his allies, Ivory looses another flaming belch on his quarry. Poor RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWGGHH, as large as he is, could not duck in time to avoid getting singed.

Ivory regenerates 2 health.
5 damage to wolf from aura.
Healing Word regains 19 HP.
Fire Elixir deals 10 damage to wolf, bloodied; 15 damage to ravens.

Despite the unkindness' pecking and scratching, Ebony manages to gather as much kindling as one can possibly find in 4 seconds. Given the dry conditions, it shouldn't be too difficult to start a forest fire. Although, one must wonder what the forest's inhabitants and protectors may have to say about it.

Ebony shifts away, but the birds pursue the fleeing kobold. He must pay for killing their master.

5 damage to Ebony from aura. Bloodied.
Unkind Damage deals 6 damage to Ebony. Blinded until end of ravens' next turn.

Ivory (12), Ebony (23), Unkindness of Ravens (26)

Pretend there's a pile of sticks at V12.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

2 Dice Rolls *damage

Realising that fire breathing was the best way to kill the birds before his buddy's irational fear of aura effects caused him to torch the whole bloody forest, the old man followed the birds and unleashed another almighty belch.

Move left a bit so I'm three squares from the birds without hitting any allies and firebreath on swarm

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Huh. They had 17 HP left. Dang.

Ivory's belch incinerates every single raven that's swarming his partner.

Victory!

The three bloodied compatriots take a moment to catch a breather and recover from the beating they just received from a bunch of birds and their midget master.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

"Irrational fear? IRRATIONAL FEAR? You ancient hick THIS IS ME"

YouTube Video

Bees are a kind of unkindness.

Additional Spam:
anyway fuck dis I'm checking the midget for any gear and also I'm checking around to see if there's any obvious traps or loot or shit lying about cause I was a klepto in high school.

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1 Die Roll Ebony's Perception

Ebony approaches the halfling he so mercilessly gored to death. For such a portly fellow with a beer belly, the prowler was quite agile, Ebony reflected. The ranger's examination of the corpse was brief - telltale white crusted lesions on the decedent's skin indicates the halfling was afflicted with, or perhaps newly-recovered from a disease Ebony would rather not deal with.

Digging into the prowler's clothes, Ebony finds a rolled parchment hidden inside. While it is written in a script he cannot read, it's clear that this was a bounty notice. Perhaps the etching of his and Ivory's faces has something to do with this conclusion.

Originally Posted by The Parchment Reads:

ברייטהאַרציקייַט נאָטיץ
באַלוינונג: אַ מיליאָן גאָלד שטיקער

העלפאַנדביין, לאָנגטאָאָטה שיפטער קלעריק פון באָרדרעי.
צוזאַמען מיט זייַן ליבלינג עבאָני, אַ קאָבאָלד וועלדערער.

לעצטע געזען אין דער געזעלשאַפט פון אַ גרויס דירע וואָלף.

טאַרגעץ זענען אַרמד און גאָר געפערלעך! נוצן עקסטרעם וואָרענען ווען קאַנפראַנטינג זיי. צי ניט פּרווון צו פילנ פאָרויס זיי סייַדן איר זענט בייַ פּאַראַגאָן מדרגה.

דער וואָלף איז עקספּענדאַבלע, אָבער ביידע טאַרגאַץ זאָל זייַן קאַפּטשערד לעבעדיק מיט קיין שטענדיק שעדיקן. אויב איר פירן צו כאַפּן זיי, באַריכט תיכף צו די פרעעפּאָרט פּרק פון די האַלפלינג בענעוואָלענט פאַרבאַנד. פאָדערן דיין ברייטהאַרציקייַט פון פין.

The kobold's eyes are quickly drawn to a handsome brooch

hanging on the halfling's neck, on which is inscribed a name which he does not recognize. The kobold's experienced eye quickly identifies the artifact as a Brooch of No Regrets

.

This was the only magical artifact among the halfling's possessions. After a quick inventory of his pack, Ebony lays out the following mundane items:

1. A short sword, tipped with now-inactive bloodstinger poison
2. A crossbow, with bolts of ammunition
3. An old-looking set of thieves' tools, inscribed with the name Griddley
4. Plain leather armor, branded with a stylized H-shaped mark
5. 510 gold pieces

A quick check of the immediate surroundings show no traps of any kind. And after slitting open a few fried raven corpses, there was nothing of interest to note.

For the moment, Ebony and Ivory are safe and alone in the woods with their big bad wolf.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?