[DnD] Tomb of Horrors (GFF D&D Adventure X)

Seeing the Kobold waving his hand through the black sphere like it wasn't there, I gingerly prodded at the red one in front of me. Rather than stick my head through it, I carefully attempted to remove the picture from the wall to see what, if anything was behind it.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Hmm, the space behind the painting was a bit too small for me to squeeze into but I was fairly certain there was something of interest down there.

I picked up the Halfling and helped him into the hole, offering him my lantern if he needed some illumination.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

With the ropes retrieved from upstairs and everyone down here, I jiggled the grapple free and retrieved my chain before going back to the halfling in the hole and giving him a gentle shove of encouragement.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

From what Slim had said, it seemed as though his passage was the way forward. Still, it paid to be thorough so, mindfull of the trap that we'd already encountered, I began to carefully remove all the other pictures from the wall, standing to the side as I did and laying it on the floor below so we could still reference the colours if needs be.

I thought to myself as I went about the task how surprisingly pleasant the whole experience had been so far. After all, we'd been down here for hours now and the only creatures we had encountered had been the two elves who had tured out to be rather friendly. Given the martial bearing of most of our party I had expected this job to be a running battle against hordes of the undead, rather than this rather enjoyable series of puzzles.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I heard some kind of crashing and commotion coming from the opening but sadly as Sam had my lantern, I couldn't see down there to make out what was going on. The hole was a little small for me to fit down but since it had been me that had stuffed him into the hole in the first place, I figured I should go down there and see if he needed a hand with anything. Having seen the rigged spears in a couple of the holes, I feared the worst and with the wantonly destructive Kobold having been the next down the tunnel, who knows what was going on down there?

Climb into hole, crawl as far as possible down the tunnel towards Sam and Slim

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I saw Sam come scrabbling down the tunnel towards me with a wild look in his eyes. If whatever was down there had spooked him that much, there was likely to be little I could do to help. I backed up out of the tunnel as fast as I could.

Back up, double move back out of the tunnel, end in BL-23 if possible

How ya doing, buddy?

Despite their hasty retreat, Slim seemed pretty keen to get back down the tunnel. I still hadn't really worked out what they'd seen down there and I wasn't convinced that I wanted to know.

"If you gents are set on going back in there then that's fine. I'd hate to block up the tunnel though, I'm not as spry as I once was wot? I'll bring up the rear as it were, in case any of the blighters try to circle round behind us".

I stood by and waited for the others to re-enter the tunnel so I could take my place as the rear-guard.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

The Elemental guy seemed lost in thought. Knowing how upset he'd be if he missed out on the action, I grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and dragged him over to the tunnel before stuffing him into the entrance and pushing him down in front of me. I attempted to position him in such a way as to get a good look at what was going on but I slipped and accidentally pushed him into one of the chests.

Go through the tunnel dragging GFZ with me. Stand in BL0 and shove GFZ into the skeleton chest

Most amazing jew boots

1 Die Roll Chaaaarge

I threw my arms up to protect myself from the stream of angry wasps, issuing a slightly girly scream before slipping quickly into unconciousness as the first of the creatures started to sting me.

Beefi Kertanz shook the wasps out of his mane, ignoring the feeble creatures' stings as he would ignore the gentle caress of a light summer rain. He quickly identified the source of the insects, a large, reanimated skeleton loomed in the chamber, cackling threats in the unnatural way of the undead. Beefi had no time for the undead, to him they represented sloppy workmanship. When the minotaur killed something, it stayed dead.

This overgrown deadite would be no different from the others. The minotaur lowered his head and charged.

Move to BO-1, Goring charge on skeleton
+15 vs AC 22 = 7+ to hit

There's nowhere I can't reach.

2 Dice Rolls *Damage

Beefi Kertanz was slightly confused. He had lowered his head and charged, as he had to countless foes in countless battles but unlike most of his opponents, this impudent deadite remained standing. This was a situation that needed remedying and quickly.

The minotaur moved with a grace that belied his massive frame, ducking beneath the whirling blades of the Skeleton and the Elemental before bunching his shoulders, performing a neat pirouette and aiming a mighty blow at the creature's midrift.

Graceful Manouver three squares north to BL-1, Brutal Slam against Skeleton (+12 vs Fort, 7+ to hit)

The blow connected, smashing into the walking pile of bones and sending it sprawling back across the room, over the chest and into the mummy behind. Beefi smiled as once again, all was made right with the world.

Skeleton takes 2D12+7 (13) damage, is pushed to BP-5:BO-4 and knocked prone. Mummy at BP-5 is probably hit by a massive, flying skeleton and hopefully dies as a result.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

1 Die Roll Chaaaarge

The skeleton was certainly a tenacious opponent; the minotaur would enjoy destroying this one. Despite his less than successful initial charge, Beefi was loathe to give up on the idea. Plotting a route that would take him via murdering the remaining mummy, the mighty half-cow lowered his head and set off at a run across the room

Charge attack on remaining mummy via squares that don't provoke OAs, end in square BO1

That his final intended target was not the first thing he was aiming at caused sufficient distraction that Beefi once again completely failed to impale anything on his mighty horns and he stopped short next to the mummy with a slightly bemused look on his face. He stepped backwards, glaring at the impudent creature that steadfastly refused to explode into interesting shaped chunks.

Boots power, shift to BN2

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

2 Dice Rolls PRES BUTAN

Much to the minotaur's surprise, the swirling melee deposited the big skeleton at his feet, precisely where he wanted it to be. Without a second's hesitation, he swung his axe at the monster's face, the edge of the weapon carving through the air with a loud booming sound.

Curtain of Steel in response to Skeleton's attack (10+ to hit)

The living corpse ducked at the last moment and the axe buried itself an inch in the side of the trap machine. As he struggled to wrench his weapon free, the skeleton slashed at the Barbarian, causing a fine red line to appear on his mighty bicep. The wound served only to enrage the Minotaur, not from the pain for one such as he pays no heed to anything less than a permanently crippling injury, but from the impudence of his enemy and from his own frustration that he had still not managed to remove the skeleton's head.

Beefi would not be denied his trophy. He set off after his quarry, ducking past the spluttering end of the weird contraption in the chest, focussed entirely on the lumbering pile of bones in front of him. Using his momentum, the minotaur swung as he moved, a wide, sweeping strike, such as a lesser mortal might use to swat away a fly.

Pressing Strike on skeleton, starting with shift to BP1 (10+ to hit)

Again a swing and a miss. Beefi's eyes rolled back into his head and he vented his rage in a fearsome roar.

"MMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

Following through from his missed attack, Beefi ducked to where he hoped he'd be out of the firing line of the flame cannon. He did not fear the machine's wrath but there was no point in getting your clothes burnt if you could avoid it.

Shift to BQ1

I was speaking idiomatically.

The minotaur raised his axe once more, ready to deliver a final, killing blow to the animated skeleton. His swing was interupted however by the spectral snake launched by his companion which smashed the monster to pieces.

Beefi had been denied his kill and he was furious. He rounded on the Shifter, with murder in his eyes. Something was going to die this day and the barbarian cared not what it was. He took a slow, meaningful step towards his erstwhile companion, hefting his axe menacingly. His second step was less impressive however as he stepped into the gunk left behind by the flame trap, slipped and fell heavily, knocking himself out in the process.

I awoke to myself lying on the floor. I was still in the room with the chests only there were now bones scattered about the floor and my new friends all had a slightly scorched look about them. I hoped I hadn't missed anything important while I was passed out and made a pretence of examining the floor for pressure pads in the hopes that nobody would notice I'd been unconcious.

Hopping to my feet, I noticed that the chests had all been opened and ever being a keen student of chest design, I peered into each in turn to see if there were any interesting nuances of their construction.

It had been bugging me since we entered this tomb that although we were growing closer as a team, there was still no central unifying factor binding us together and I decided that we needed a name for our merry band. My companions were all certainly the violent type but having encountered no enemies since entering the place, they were all starting to look a little frustrated, even angry in the case of Slim the lizardman.

Inspiration hit me, given our number and demeanour, it seemed only fitting that henceforth our group shall be known as The Furious Five.

Spend a surge, examine chests for goodies, check the room for secret panels and shit, propose that we should officially be named the Furious Five.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Slim seemed fascinated by the strange machine that appeared to have emerged from the chest while I was unconcious. I had a horrible feeling he was thinking of bringing it along with us.

In the bottom of the chest was a strange looking ring. At least I think it was a ring, on a smaller creature, it might have passed for a bangle. I wondered who it might belong to, it looked rather nice and I would dearly have liked to buy it should I know who to pay for it. I slipped it on to my finger for the time being. This certainly didn't look like a shop and having not met anyone big enough to wear the thing thus far, I was fairly certain that we'd bump into whoever did own it if we carried on deeper into the tomb.

Feeling a twinge of guilt at just taking the thing without asking, I dropped a few coins into the chest as a deposit for my purchase.

With nothing else of particular interest in the room, I asked Sam for my lantern back and headed back out into the corridor and waited for the others before squeezing myself into and down the other tunnel.

Take and equip Ring of Giants, leave 10gp as a downpayment in the chest. Get lantern back from Sam, go back to and down the other tunnel.

FELIPE NO

Leading the rest of the Furious Five down the cramped tunnel, I emerged into a massive chamber. I wasn't sure how deep we'd got since entering the tomb but the ceiling seemed improbably high in here.

Detecting the faint whiff of lavender that we had been told about before, I set off towards the south. The whole room had the air of a temple about it and I had never met an unfriendly priest before so I was moderately confident that there was no danger here.

Move to the south, staying within lantern light range of the others

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

From what I could remember from the riddle in the entrance hall, we must be up to the bit where we had to sacrifice a magic ring or something.

"Wait up gents" I called to the others who seemed keen to investigate the burning smell "If I remember rightly, we're supposed to pop a magic ring on this or something and it just so happens that I found a magic ring in the box back there. Surely it can't be a coincidence, what?"

At the very least, that would ease my anguish at having taken the thing without properly paying for it.

I eased the ring off my finger and laid it on the altar, not entirely certain what to expect next.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I'll admit I was slightly disappointed that plonking the ring down on the altar didn't do anything. Leaving it where it lay, I mooched over to the south wall, checking it for any more secret doors, seeing as how this place seemed to be riddled with them.

Check south wall for secret doors, especially the bit with no shadow in front of it due south of Slim although I suspect that's a map glitch rather than a doorway.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Bearing in mind the riddle written on the floor in the first room and given that the altar appeared to be a moderately unsubtle trap, I retrieved the magic ring and posted it into the slot I had found in the wall.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I jumped back as the activated secret door nearly ripped my arm off. It was a shame about the ring but I was secretly quite pleased that the temptation to take things that weren't mine had been somewhat forcibly removed.

While I waited for the dust to settle, I pondered as to how anyone living in the depths of this tomb could really poise much of a danger to the city above. With such a convoluted path to get into the place, the chances of raising any sort of undead army and then getting it all to the surface in one piece seemed slim at best. It was with some dismay that I came to the conclusion that there was probably a really simple route down to the bottom, most likely hidden round the back of the mausoleum above ground. Still, it was a bit of a mission to get back up there and if the riddle in the entrance hall was anything to go by, we were about halfway now so going forward might prove easier than going back.

The elemental with the unpronouncable name was investigating the odd cloudy archway. We had avoided all of them so far and I saw no good reason to change that tactic now. Of all my new companions, the wolfman, though quiet seemed to be the most rational and certainly the least self-destructive. Sam's casual acceptance of the massive, talking skull he was merrily desecrating was unnerving to say the least and the little Kobold was quite clearly an entire basket full of food short of a picnic.

Garold rushed past me into the new corridor and I followed close behind him. Maybe he could smell something? I hoped it wasn't a monster, having got this far without encountering anything hostile, I was not relishing our first aggressive encounter and the others finding out just how little use I'd be in a fight.

If I was understanding the riddle right, we were supposed to look out for some pits and check the walls or something so I did just that.

Check the walls for interesting things, tread carefully in case of pitfall traps.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

That the pit was full of rats suggested to me that there was a way out down there, maybe the riddle meant to check the walls of the pit? Not wishing to climb down and take a look myself, I tied my lantern to my length of chain and lowered it into the pit, swishing it back and forth, hoping to scare the rats into whatever hole they had entered the pit through.

How ya doing, buddy?

I recoiled back as Slim tossed the burning fuel tank into the pit, luckily managing to avoid getting any of the exploding viscera in my mouth. The others were less fortunate however and everyone except Garold and me were starting to look a little queasy.

The wanton destruction had quite taken my breath away and as such, rather than volunteer to clamber into the pit to look for more secret doors, I instead opted for being in charge of holding the other end of the rope.

"So, er, well, um, I suppose one of us gents should probably go and have a look around down there, check the walls as it were. I'd offer to do it myself but I don't suppose you fellows would relish the thought of lowering me in there any more than you'd enjoy pulling me back out so if someone wants to volunteer I'd be more than happy to take the strain".

Hold one end of a rope for someone (Preferably someone who already has filth fever) to climb into the pit and look for lewt/doors/more traps.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

1 Die Roll Soar like an eagle

Slim called up with his findings, clearly the way forward was not in the pit and neither in the next, unless some crazed tomb builder had decided that swimming in green sludge was a sensible way to get in and out of a tomb.

Rather than pull Slim straight back up, I figured I'd save him the leap across and pull him up from the other side. I took a few steps back before running up and leaping over the pit.

How ya doing, buddy?

2 Dice Rolls Hop

I jumped over the remaing pits, primarily because the Kobold was still attached to the rope I was holding.

I untied the rope and peered into the water, wondering if GFZ might volunteer to see what was at the bottom.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

A party? Down here? How delightful!

I looked around at the rest of the Furious Five. They were dressed almost uniformly in tatty scraps of armour, now for the most part drenched in slimy water or covered in chunks of rat meat, hardly the suitable attire for a party.

I brushed myself down as best I could, straightened my collar and sheathed my axe. It had been a while since I had been to a social function and the gods be dammned if I was going to attend this one poorly presented.

I strode up to the door and was about to knock when a thought hit me, what if this was a private party? I'd hate to intrude and cause a scene. I shouted back down to the rest of the team.

"Er, gents, do you think we ought to risk arriving without an invitation? Teribbly bad form really, I don't suppose anyone thought to bring a bottle, wot?"

Move up to the door, try to look presentable.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Well, it seemed that the lack of an invitation was no problem and with it being so dark in there, hopefully our ruse would stick.

I stepped into the room and began working my way around the wall to the left, feeling ahead of me as I went looking for a bar, or in fact anything of interest.

There's nowhere I can't reach.