Need some help with an interview I am going to

1.) While I myself have never attempted to go into the biotech industry, I imagine that there are a few things you would want to say while avoiding others completely. Tell them that you are a fan of biotechnology and would be willing to cross any moral/ethical bounds in order to further the field. Tell them you often inject yourself with custom biotechs that you created in your basement in the name of science, and to date none of them have left any side effects that would stop you from working, and in fact some of them might aid you, such as the prehensile tail, or the extra three fingers on your left hand. Also, due to the very nature of biotech, avoid mentioning any amount of admiration for nanomachines or their kin. You see, due to the war between genes(biotech) and memes(nanotechnology) and their inherent differences, showing any admiration for the enemy would label you as a spy, and in most places spies are shot.

2.)The questions that could potentially be asked are numerous, so I shall skip to the "Why should we hire you" question. Aside from the aforementioned willingness to cross any moral or ethical boundries, also let your potential employers know of any special skills you might have that would help accomplish goals for the company. Being able to effectively multitask would be a good point to state. Another good point would be mentioning your ability to make a person's head explode as if it were a rotten melon dropped from the top of a (very) tall building, as such a skill would surely help eliminate competition. You have to be creative here about the use of any special skills you have, and perhaps you should come up with a few points ahead of time and write them down on a note card or the like.

3.)When they ask if you have any questions, simply reply that during the interview you used your telepathic biotechnical powers to browse the man's brain, from whence you copied any information you had not previously been in your biological hard drive prior to your meeting. Also let him know that you will never let his wife know that he is a furry at heart.

4.) For the resume, your lap would be a suitable spot. However, if you are truly a believer in the biotech way, you should have already used the DNA of a marsupial to grow a pouch somewhere on your body for easy storage. This would be the most effective place to store a resume since not only would your lap be free, but when you retrieve it you could show that your left hand retained all of its dexterity despite having on additional three fingers on said hand.

I wish you the best of luck, as getting a job in the economy today is a challenge.

How ya doing, buddy?