Friends with benefits

I'm in a borderline relationship with someone, somewhere between friends and an actual physical/emotional relationship. After pseudo-dating for less than a week, we've realized that we would have no time to actually 'date' or 'go out' once summer ends. (work, college, etc.) Becoming 'friends with benefits' was brought up and I felt conflicted about it. Someone's going to get hurt. Being in that sort of relationship with 'no strings attached' seems unrealistic.

Has anyone been a friend w/benefits? I'm curious to know if that sort of thing can actually work itself out.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Thanks for the excellent advice, everyone. For the sake of clarity, I'm the female, the one who brought up being friends w/benefits was the guy.

During that week, (when we were going out) I've gotten attached to him and having the relationship demoted soon afterwards was, best said, confusing. I had to thread carefully, severing all ties seemed a tad overkill. Next week, I'm off from work/college. That's probably the best time for me to tell him I just want us to remain close friends. I'm just glad that there's no animosity between us: We still plan on hanging out, watching a flik, etc.

To think, in some alternate universe, he and I would be having wild, hot sex right about now. Ha!

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Dee

It's not too late.



Since you feel more than he does, maybe being a friends with benefits thing is not so special to him. You might end up getting hurt in the end, especially since it's just a weeklong fling.

Also since he brought it up, it seems like he doesn't want to get into a relationship but you do. Personally for me I wouldn't give it to the guy unless he feels the same way.

Hell, it was a fling. A weeklong fling. Having finally acknowledged that, I'm feeling pretty good. Scratch that, I feel fucking terrific! :biggrin: Here I was thinking what I had with him was something special, freakin' sacrosanct and feeling shitty because I lost it.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.