[DnD] Let's Cast Magic Missile!

Nonsense, I am a harsh DM but fair. The world does not magically change to fuck you over (usually).

On those lines I kind of remembered that there are rules for uh CATCHING YOURSELF when you get knocked off a precipice. Now I'm not going to apply them to this battle because it would tarnish the glory of Dillo Soccer, but in future would you guys prefer:

A: if you fall off of something you're dead (including players)

B: if you fall off of something, you get a saving throw to catch yourself

System A has been working well for us so far, but it's technically not in keeping with the rules and I don't want anyone to get butthurt in the unlikely event that some lucky monster shoves you off a cliff.

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by Skexis

So, Pang, did my damage not take effect because Helga's immune to Radiant damage?

No, she took damage, I just don't usually expressly tell everyone their damage anymore since everyone mostly does their own rolls and can figure their own damage. If something had gone wrong, I would make that explicit.

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

I guess I'm just curious why Helga wasn't subject to one from both Gordok and Gheth. Especially since she used an area attack while adjacent to Gheth...

Because she used a close blast rather than an area attack is why. I guess I should make more of these things explicit in the posts.

Originally Posted by Hawkeye

Yes, opportunity attacks happen any time a character (you, for example) leaves a space adjacent to an enemy, even if you're moving into another space adjacent to the enemy.

I was about to argue with you on this point, but this seems to be the case on a careful rereading. Mea culpa. I guess Opportunity Attacks are going to be a lot more frequent on both sides now. I do owe Gheth an AoO from Helga's move (but not Gordok, since he's dazed when it happens).

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A: If we went around strictly enforcing "proper" turn order the game would move even slower than it already does. Worst comes to worst we just do as Garr did and assume an implied Delay was taken, and even that's not usually necessary.

B: Please don't go around deleting other players' posts willy-nilly.

Actually scratch all that I just noticed how far out of sequence he was the silly ass

C: As far as I can tell, Diplomacy doesn't have an assigned action type — because it's not really intended for use in combat. There's really nothing governing whether or not it will work other than the mood of the DM.

D: Yes, AoOs interrupt but Gheth didn't actually hit so I'm not clear on what the issue is. Close attacks (which is what the wave of despair was) don't trigger AoOs if that's what you're getting at. If it was a Ranged or Area attack then you'd be in the right.

Yes, I realize the inherent absurdity of an attack that has an area effect not counting as an "area" attack

E: I only used the word "squeeze" as flavor, squeezing is a medium creature moving through a small space or a large creature moving through a medium space, not a dwarf jostling through an occupied doorway.

F: Yes, we inadvertently use a lot of house rules, but using AoOs "correctly" would probably actually speed up combat a lot of the time which I think is a worthwhile goal. And as Shin pointed out it actually makes a lot of otherwise-useless abilities worth looking at.

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Originally Posted by Zergrinch

Pang's calling in reinforcements! Again.

If some people wouldn't take a nap after every other fight I wouldn't have to throw a dozen enemies at you at once.

Besides, I think it's much more interesting just to tip the fort over and dump it on you than to wait for you to explore it.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Ugh, I swear I had applied that stuff. Fucking maptools. Should be fixed now (might need a forced refresh).

Cal would have had some opportunities there yes but happily he has a ranged weapon equipped soooo

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Since Doorman is basically in this situation because of Glock's influence, I'm going to let Skills handle his turn unless a spectator wants to jump in.



Please note he's already down to 1/2 HP from getting smacked around by the troll.

Quote:

1. It seems that there's a door in X-3. If used as a barricade, how much punishment can it take?
2. What kind of actions are (a) opening (b) closing, and (c) barricading doors?
3. If, after killing Scout A, Cal uses double-move + run to go beyond V2 (in an attempt to flank Helga via AA2), how far will he end up after one turn?
4. Do beds provide cover?
5. You mentioned that kruthik teeth carry toxins. If I use them as improvised stabbing knives, what status effects (besides poison) might they inflict?
6. Helga has made nothing but area/close attacks. What kind of weapon is she currently wielding: staff, rod, warhammer, crossbow, bare-handed?
7. Why do you penalize thrift by constantly destroying Cal's arrows ;___;

1. An ordinary wooden door has about 20 HP.

2. Minor, Minor, Depends On The Method

3. At double run speed, Cal can move 16 squares so he could theoretically end up at... Z4?

4. If you were to go prone next to them, probably. Otherwise probably not.

5. I am not sure Cal has the physical strength to use teeth as an effective stabbing weapon. They're teeth, not razorblades.

They could impose weakness I suppose

6. She's a dwarf (she has a hammer [dwarves have hammers] )

7. You answer your own question.

We don't really do wishlists here, not the least because some of you (not naming names!) have certain tendencies toward munchkinism and I just know that handing you whatever gear you asked for would result in an infinite-damage combo loop within weeks.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

Any chance the orcs have damaged him some, before they died? Even a little bit?

You know what, I'll assume all four orcs actually hit him once. What the hell.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Colonel Asshole

Troll defenses please and thanks?

Added

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Zerg, let me make sure I understand your post.

You shift to V-5 as a reaction. Okay, fine. Then you fire off a Careful Attack at Helga.



Sure. Then you sprint over to AB-1, where your molecules merge with Garrmondo's as you occupy the same space. While the fusion is occurring, you attack Helga again in an unspecified manner. You already attacked during this turn, so you spend an action point. Then you take an AoO from Helga for using your bow at melee range.

THEN you run back to the bridge, necessitating that you pass by Ortak (having somehow avoided it on the way to your date with Garr) and take another AoO. Additionally, having already moved and attacked this turn, you spend another AP in order to perform this second move.

Is this correct? I don't want to move ahead if I'm misunderstanding you.

Skills, his Warrior's Surge oddly does not specify that he uses his Healing Surge, so I guess he has one on top of that.

FELIPE NO

Yeah, you can't pause a move action and then resume it like that, so I guess you'll just spend your turn fleeing.

Knowledge checks are free actions — either you know or you don't, you aren't actually doing anything other than racking your brain.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Notwithstanding that his ability to remember that you can do knowledge checks is the only immediately obvious reason why this fight won't end with an effectively immortal giant pounding you into the dirt while you all go buh

Okay, yeah, player knowledge, but that's lame as hell

Yeah Zerg has kind of a problem with overanalysis but analyzing anything at all is not so bad unless you're into the whole party-wipe thing.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Ah, but we are now operating under the Lurker Protocol of May 2009, which states:

Deus Ex Machina devices preventing the total annihilation of the party shall not be employed save after the death of 1 or more characters in a given combat.

Besides, basically every NPC in this burg has either been mooned or had robot cock waved at them, it's basically down to Gheth calling in direct divine intercession if you get boned.



I have no objection in principle to the total slaughter of the party, Deni. It's just kind of ruined for me if I achieve it purely because they were too busy giving each other wedgies to actually pay attention. Don't kill yourselves. Let me kill you.

How ya doing, buddy?

Dunno, I think LeHah's Star Wars game is going a little bit slower

On a related note, I got an itch to play on the other side of the DM's screen for a change and so I signed up for a PbP over at ENWorld. The DM sends me a PM, tells me my character's locked in a box. I tell him I want to break out of the box. He says I can't. I tell him I wanna tip the box over. He says I can't. I say I wanna yell real loud until some other asshole opens this fucking box. He says nobody hears me.

Eventually I get out of the fucking box (all 5 players were locked in boxes, I shit you not) and then we spent literally an entire month standing around introducing ourselves to each other before I gave up and just deleted my bookmark and never looked back

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Somewhere, ReclusiveWriter is running a "mature" campaign of Big Eyes, Small Mouth

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Poor Zerg. Thwarted by common sense.

Again.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Shin

Nobody in the G-Unit's even been reduced to zero hitpoints yet have they?

I had Acer on the ropes for a second there, but Skills time-paradoxed it away from me.

But let's be fair, they've just been fighting dwarves. Dwarves don't know how to kill anything.

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

I must say that battles probably ran faster in their day

Hardly. The party probably has a higher average damage per round now than at any time in the past now that it actually has Strikers in it. Look how fast you guys killed Helga. She got to do each of her signature attacks once, then boom.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Next Week: G-Unit attempts to negotiate with the tarrasque

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by AcerBandit

Wild Shape slimy salamander

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Those are the exterior doors from the bridge, Skex. They're already open.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

It's indicating which enemy is your current quarry.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Yeah, there's a door there. No denying that. It's a open door that led from W-4 to X-4 — despite being open, it was still an obstacle. Open doors do not cease to exist. I'm not sure how I can make closed doors vs open doors alongside a wall more visually distinct. :/

I'll put an icon primer on the wiki and link to it in the OP, the OP is crowded enough without another two dozen images.

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

How about other movements such as sliding, pulling, pushing, jumping away, and teleporting?

Pushing, pulling and sliding are all "forced movement" and do not trigger AoOs. Teleporting does not trigger AoOs. Jumps are part of a normal move action, therefore they would trigger an AoO if a normal move would.

Originally Posted by Skexis

is it possible to aim for a certain part of an enemy's body in exchange for higher DC?

Not really. Anatomy per se is almost entirely a function of flavor these days, which is why you can sneak attack an ooze, set a stone golem on fire, and tackle a ghost. I could implement a called-shot system on my own but then we'd just have monsters shooting you in the brain for instant death all the damned time.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Get the Flash Player to play this audio file:

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

Anyway, I'm posting here to confirm whether I have line of sight from AB1 to the troll.

Yup

Quote:

If I'm interpreting the rules correctly, I'm supposed to draw a line from any corner in my square, to all four corners occupied by Gorg. And if any one is impeded, he has cover. And if all four are impeded, he has superior cover. Correct?

Yup

Quote:

If the enemy occupies more than 1 square (like Gorg), can I choose any square I like?

Usually

We have two bards

We don't need three

PS Acer your curse only triggers when you use warlock attacks, not on your druid stuff

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

What level encounter would you consider this (admittedly with a delay mechanism) lineup to be?

Strictly speaking I've used up the XP budget for a 10th-level combat here, but considering half the combatants were wiped out before they could so much as say boo I think that was mitigated quite a bit.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by Zergrinch

So long as ol' Pangy ain't in on the plotting

I was actually kind of hoping you guys would get a secret clubhouse so as to plot behind my back. 'course, the secrecy inevitably falls apart when somebody has to ask me how the rules work

You might be able to just make a separate thread for player-only discussion, really. Threadban me and User 0 and you're set. Dunno if it's really worth the trouble though.

VVV Pretty sure threadbans need a Supermod or better, but as it happens—

FELIPE NO