Let's Cast Magic Missile!
 

I handle most of the rules considerations. If you try to do something illegal, I'll usually just drop you a note in this thread and give you the opportunity to edit your actions.

5 players at a time maximum. As characters die or players drop out, the next one in the queue slots in.

At the absolute minimum, you pick a race and a class. That's all the character design work you absolutely need to do.

If you'd prefer to actually assemble the character yourself instead of relying on my good graces, use the official Character Builder: (Ongoing Free Trial). It will walk you through the process and is extremely painless compared to assembling the character manually. While it's not hard to find a cracked version if you know where to look, just ask me and I'll probably share my account with you.


RACES

CLASSES

CURRENT ROSTER


Garr: Garrmondo Alkatraz (Wiki) Human Fighter

AcerBandit: Gordok of Zark (Wiki) Halfling Hybrid Druid/Warlock

Skexis: Gheth McGarnigal (Wiki) Dragonborn Cleric of Avandra

Colonel Skills: Glockenspiel McSteelChest (Wiki) Warforged Bard

Zergrinch: Cal Amah of Rhee (Wiki) Changeling Ranger


RETIRED CHARACTERS


Zephyrin: Fescue Totengeld, Human Rogue. Sought the Amulet of Yendor.

a_lurker: Brigid Conmara, Halfling Cleric of Melora. Poisoned to death by spiders.

Bradylama: Argumentus of Hamfist, Human Fighter. Retired from adventuring.

Denicalis: Gabriel Sledgehammer, Dwarven Paladin of Kord. First and last practitioner of Nude Cliff Tobogganing.

knkwzrd: Motsognir the Subgenius, Dwarven Warlord. Faustian bargain caught up with him.

Shin: Scary Bob, Elven Wizard. Can see dead people, be dead people.

LeHah: Delic Swagger, Human Fighter. Existed only as a split personality.

Dubble: Puns MacKenzie, Gnome Rogue. Eaten by a Grue.


POSSIBLE RESERVES

Zephyrin - Some Dude (Again)
Hawkeye (Eladrin Rogue)
wvlfpvp - Virgil Hatherborne (Watersoul Genasi Swordmage)
packrat - Robin (Warforged Warlock)
Soluzar, maybe?
Araes
a lurker again probably
Maris (I did promise)
Denicalis might have more free time next time
orion_mk3 (was busy, try again later)
Shin and his Minotaur
knk and his wonderful magical beard
ninjaguydan
CetteHamsterLa (questionable availability, try later)

RESOURCES

It should go without saying, but these links are for GFF use only. If I see referrers from any other sites downloading these, they'll be gone. It's not difficult by any means to find these elsewhere, but I provide them for your convenience.

HIDDEN TO GUESTS. Register and make yourself known.

**Hidden Content**

This concept of Superfly Johnson intrigues me. Tell me more.

I'd be down for this, though I haven't played D&D for fucking years. I've got the 4th edition books downloaded, though. When would you want to start? If we have a week or so, I can do my own characters. lvl 1 creation? If you need it sooner than that, sure. A Dwarf with a huge warhammer seems spiffy.

cheetos, mountain dew, virginity etc.

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(Yeah, 1st level. How soon I need it largely depends on how long it takes to find enough people — which is to say you probably have plenty of time.)

I'm intrigued by the fairy aspect of things. And also the righteous bastard aspect of things. Anyway one could be a fairy paladin? =o Flitting around on gossamer wings smiting sodomites sounds fun.

Well, when I say "fairy" this is less Tinkerbell and more Titania & Oberon, so no wings. Limited teleport, though, so there is still flitting.

What if you were a sassbox fairy? Can you teleport over people and sit on them?

edit: actually what I'm asking here is what mood you're going for? Is this going to be entirely tongue in cheek, sardonic and ridiculous, or were aiming for this to be serious?

Well, the problem with being "tongue-in-cheek" per se is that not everybody is good at that and I think I would rather avoid having the whole thing devolve into Monty Python quotes. But I don't think being grim and frostbitten about the whole thing is going to be any fun either so as long as we can avoid turning into Rocky Horror: Orc Dorks Edition, go nuts

I have enough time to waste to sign up for something like this.

I've never played D&D before but I've played final fantasy and have seen fantasy book covers / van paintings. Is this enough knowledge?

I am fairly sure that zero knowledge would be enough knowledge

Bullshit. 4th Edition?! How am I going to have my dwarf bard, Pang? Huh?! :mad:

I've only ever played a little 1st edition, using books passed down and venerated through generations. The names of dozens of deceased characters are inscribed inside the covers like a family Bible, from poor yousuc to mighty PhilJr.

I understand that the latest editions of the rules remove all race-based constraints on class? That's the perfect opportunity to create some bizarre combinations, like a halfling fighter specializing in polearms or a tiefling paladin that's always suicidal. Sounds neat; I'm interested.

It hit SUCK IT DOWN and I just burst out laughing. All right. Monday I'm going to write up a character. If you get enough people before then, just go Dwarf Fighter with a Hammer and a can-do attitude.

I've always dreamed of being nerdy enough to actually play D&D, but all my friends were always in the middle of a fifteen year campaign or something so I couldn't join. Can you make my dreams come true Pang?

No, your friends were just being jerks.

Seriously, how long does it take to say Oh hey you guys meet some gnome in a tavern, deal with it

I'd like to get in on this. I have enough time myself to get into this sorta thing, and I got alot of experience with 3.5.

I'm sorry. You're overqualified for the position you've requested. We'd prefer to hire useless summer students for half your wage.

I've been awarded a certificate of retardation by the crown, but unlike most other mentally challenged my underdeveloped frontal lobes make me give punches instead of hugs. My name is Argumentus of Hamfist.

This is my character profile and also what I look like IRL (In Real Life):

If Brady and Deni are playing, this looks like it could be fun. I played D&D a bit until we got hold of Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay but I spent a good few years playing that and Rifts so, yeah, count me in.

Two fighters so far so I'll be a wizard, an elf one at that. My character is called Scary Bob and dreams of becoming a necromancer one day and raising an army of the undead to do his bidding, mainly because when he was growing up the other elves thought he was weird and wouldn't play with him. Athough he added the monicer "Scary" himself, he dreams of one day being known far and wide as something like Bob the Mentalist or Bob the Despoiler. Wears a lot of black and eyeliner.

I am officially (I hope) signed up.

I'll go with 'backstabber/kleptomaniac".

I know that's not much a role to play for me, but you can devise any other details for me to make me have to put forth effort.

I'll pick up the rest as I go along.

I am Motsognir The Subgenius, a Dwarven Warlord, and I am clever as fuck.

I want in goddamn it. But I'm stuck remembering 2nd Edition, so I think I'd just end up seriously confused.

Think of it like a computer game and Pang embodies the soulless calculating power of the cpu as the GM. If you want to play to win you aren't playing right.