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Sol's Journal

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Oct 28, 2020 - 02:12 AM
So the Dodgers finally won a world series
I mean it's been, what, thirty two years?

Been well what how the where why fuck it, the world's gone crazy and here I am, fifteen years later and I find myself here, man, what does it mean.

Digging for innocence, if there was ever such a thing. Looking for a more honest time where criticism came from within, not the omnipresent bedlam of social media and all it's ills. Looking for honest opinions!

I just don't know. The Dodgers won a world series. Here I am, a artifact of a time where anything was possible - like the Dodgers getting the win - and it was always just around the corner. But now I'm here screaming into the void "we finally made it!!!" as if it were proving one of the signs of the Revelations. Should I be excited? Sure! Why Not? Why the hell not?!

'cause thirty two years is far too long to hold onto innocent virtues, and far too long to hold onto that old standby of the American dream. Here I am shouting rah rah rah to the audience when they all left at the sixth inning. Shouting that we can all make it when no one is left to cross that finish line. The truth is only a few of us will make it.

I still don't know why I'm here. Am I treating this site like a confessor? Like a blank page that I can write my epitaph on? Like a shot into the long dark past that hopes to hit something that rings true though the years, however faint?

Fuck, am I just here for pity comments? I'm wasted enough to confess yes, and to accept whatever banishment comes of it, if anyone of authority still remains.

Looking at this site and all its posts makes me a little maudlin for how the times where when the city streets were bustling, when the sewers flowed and the inside jokes were sharp and swift. When personalities snapped at each other, when clichés were unique to our community, when we looked at screen-names and could instantly recognize who they were. When things were alive! Fifteen years after the fact - and after nicknames replacing actual names - I can still tell when Deni, Sass, Miles, Tails, Pang, or so many others make a post. That is what it means to have made a community.

We will never get back there, bar a legitimate miracle.

But the Dodgers won a World Series title after thirty two years of striving and hope.

So maybe that miracle isn't so far off as we think it is.

Thank you for listening to my drunk ted-talk goodnight everybody!

-Sol a.k.a. Sol_Confinement

Currently Playing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TA9LVzuC7z4

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