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The Best Things You've Learned From Your Parents
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Angel of Light
A Confused Mansbridge


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Old Jun 5, 2008, 10:10 PM Local time: Jun 5, 2008, 11:40 PM #1 of 57
The Best Things You've Learned From Your Parents

During my time working away and keeping busy. It does get incredibly hard and incredibly lonely. I'm proud to say that I have really great parents that are there to support me and get through all the rough times that come with working up here especially my dad.

I consider my dad to be one of my very best friends because the knowledge that man has attained through all of his experiences that he has had in his life has played a very important part in the person I am today. My dad was the only person in my family that truly respected all of my individual interests. Even if it seemed obscure or different compared to what was considered normal at the time.

I use to be a real depressive teen. Always whining about how life was unfair and that I could never get a break. My dad always made himself available to talk especially through some of the most horrible times I've ever had to endure in life. A lot of the things that I believe in right now are the things that he told me. His words of wisdom have helped get through any challenging time in my life because he taught me that it is the very challenges that go through in life is what defines you.

My dad has never had it easy, he always worked hard for everything that is important to him and it is through his experiences and my future wife that I look upon for inspiration while I continue to work up here.

I'll share you the story and the lesson that I still believe in to this very day because of its value in my life right now. My dad had lost his job in the early to mid 1990's. This was due to cod fishery closing down in our province and unfortunately a lot of people in the entire province had lost their jobs and this happened back in 1992-1993. He had an opportunity to have a really good paying job but he had to move his entire family to the other side of canada to vancouver island. He was against it because he wanted to keep his family home. They gave him this other option that he had to go away for 4 to 5 months at a time. When I was between the ages of 12-15 I didn't have much of a fatherly presence and he had to go away to places such as china, russia, equador, costa rica, and taiwan. He did that to keep his family home, and so that he had the rest of his life to look forward to and as hard as three years were he never had to move away to work again. I truly commend my mom for having the patience and love for him to endure that as well as hard as it was for me and my other siblings.

The lesson he taught me from this experience is that life is not based upon conveience. If your not willing to work hard and sacrifice for the things and the people that mean the most to you; your not ready to make the most out of your life.

That is absolutely one of the greatest lessons I have ever learned from my parents.

To the GFF community what are some of the best things you've ever learned from your parents?

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Last edited by Angel of Light; Jun 9, 2008 at 10:28 PM. Reason: Just to Satisyfy Zeph's Rage from the poor grammar of GGF
Zephyrin
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Old Jun 8, 2008, 05:32 PM Local time: Jun 8, 2008, 03:32 PM #2 of 57
My dad taught me how to be an asshole.


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DragoonKain
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Old Jun 8, 2008, 11:26 PM #3 of 57
My dad thoroughly enforced the notion of staying away from drugs, cigarettes and alcohol to me as a kid. I'll always be forever grateful for it. I have never smoked a cigarette or did a drug in my life. I also have never drank a beer in my life. Now drinking is a different animal all together unless you are driving while drunk. But I am still glad that I never got into alcohol.

Also since he was a cop, he always was on me about being a good kid and not getting myself in trouble with the law. I've always stayed free getting myself in trouble in that regard.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
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Old Jun 8, 2008, 11:54 PM Local time: Jun 8, 2008, 09:54 PM #4 of 57
My parents taught me that being a subservient member of the Catholic church is a great way to kill hours upon hours a week scraping your knees and also provide a great way to fool yourself into thinking that things happen simply by saying pretty little poems and making grand grand wishes. By their example, I have learned to steer VERY FAR FAR AWAY from what they are.

Don't get me wrong... I love my parents to the death but I sure as hell don't want to BECOME THEM.

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RainMan
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 12:12 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 12:12 AM 1 #5 of 57
My parents taught me that being a subservient member of the Catholic church is a great way to kill hours upon hours a week scraping your knees and also provide a great way to fool yourself into thinking that things happen simply by saying pretty little poems and making grand grand wishes. By their example, I have learned to steer VERY FAR FAR AWAY from what they are.
Same here. I've also learned that church is a great place to compare clothing.

I don't blame my parents for wanting to believe in something, it's just not where I am right now.

Don't get me wrong... I love my parents to the death but I sure as hell don't want to BECOME THEM.
No one wants to become their parents. They are too dorky, too outdated... but we end up following in their footsteps regardless.

I was speaking idiomatically.
...
DragoonKain
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 12:22 AM #6 of 57
Speaking of religion, my dad isn't very religious, but my mom is pretty religious. My mom tried to get me into it, but even as a kid I never really bought it. To me god was sort of like another version of the Easter Bunny.

I guess some things stick and some don't. Ultimately we have to be our own individuals.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
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Zeio Nut


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Old Jun 9, 2008, 12:26 AM 1 #7 of 57
My dad taught me not to wear his socks just because I was too lazy to fetch my own from the basement.

My mom taught me which fork goes with the salad.

Not all lessons are required to possess deep philosophical implications.

How ya doing, buddy?
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 12:38 AM #8 of 57
The most important thing either of my parents have taught me is that bubble wrap and helium are ALWAYS funny.

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Ozma
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 01:48 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 01:48 PM #9 of 57
Well...they taught me how to argue with an annoying person in the 'right' way...
My father taught me how to be patient.
My mother INSISTED me on religions (though I don't go that way).

But basically, they taught me how NOT to be like them. That's the best part.

EDIT: And how NOT to be up-to-date. Sucks.

Jam it back in, in the dark.
neus
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 01:59 AM #10 of 57
I've realized, disected, and become aware of some of the worst failings of both of my parents and ... somehow I've adopted all of them.
Just as perplexingly, I have started to pick up some of their most admirable character traits: patience, maturity, charisma, doing the right things, doing proper things when it's very difficult to do.

As for the failings, well, my mother's failings, as few as they are, I am comfortable with. Furthermore, I am glad I haven't picked up the worst of my father's failings but some things have definitely crept up in there.

It's strange to think of me in terms of who they are. What do you suppose they were like when they were my age? Did they ever think they would impact someone else they way they have? And will I ever -- how will I impact my children? What kind of nasty character traits will I pass on? What kind of nice things will I teach them?
Far as I see, I am damned lazy and very hard to get going on a proper matter. I give up easily and I don't stand up for myself enough. But at the same time, once I start working, I work hard and I become a perfectionist. I put my family very seriously, extremely seriously. I can easily get lost and I can't hold a grudge very long.

The way I look at my father now, the piece of shit I think he is -- will my son look at all the shitty things about me that way?
God. That would really suck.

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zzeroparticle
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 02:08 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 12:08 AM 1 #11 of 57
Most important lesson:

To crush my enemies, see them driven before me, and hear the lamentations of their women.

Truly a very good thing to know.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Jessykins
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 02:13 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 12:13 AM #12 of 57
My dad taught me that it's okay to be gay... if you're a woman.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?
No. Hard Pass.
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 02:49 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 01:49 AM 1 #13 of 57
I've realized, disected, and become aware of some of the worst failings of both of my parents and ... somehow I've adopted all of them.
Just as perplexingly, I have started to pick up some of their most admirable character traits: patience, maturity, charisma
Oh, that's fucking rich. Maturity, charisma and patience? Please. You're like a 10 year old with tantrums on the board, all while being thoroughly unlikeable.

Quote:
As for the failings, well, my mother's failings, as few as they are, I am comfortable with. Furthermore, I am glad I haven't picked up the worst of my father's failings
I've realized, disected, and become aware of some of the worst failings of both of my parents and ... somehow I've adopted all of them.
So... you haven't picked up the worst of them, but you've adopted all of them? Impressive.

Quote:
but some things have definitely crept up in there.

The way I look at my father now, the piece of shit I think he is -- will my son look at all the shitty things about me that way?
God. That would really suck.
The rest of us do, why shouldn't he?

My dad taught me that it's okay to be gay... if you're a woman.
Unfortunate for you that you're all man.

I was speaking idiomatically.


John Mayer just asked me, personally, through an assistant, to sing backup on his new CD.

Ozma
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 03:24 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 03:24 PM #14 of 57
My dad taught me that it's okay to be gay... if you're a woman.
Uh...huh? And why is that?

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
CelticWhisper
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 09:56 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 08:56 AM #15 of 57
That family is overrated.

More from my mother than my father. I was aware of my father's shortcomings but he acknowledges them himself and doesn't hold any illusions about infallible moral rectitude or anything.

My mother, on the other hand, has been spiralling downward ever since she remarried and it's truly beginning to grate on my nerves. She's finding religion again and now her husband (ex-seminarian AND ex-military, how's that for a recipe for self-righteousness) has her all but completely brainwashed into believing in his warped worldview wherein her "failure" to take my brother and myself to church as we were growing up represents a serious failure on her part as a human being. It's sick watching what he's doing to her mind but sicker still to hear her parrot it and go right along with it. He actually once told me that he and I were at war, but that it was "a moral war" and that he couldn't possibly lose. How she can possibly defend him to me, in anything he does, after that episode is beyond me.

But I've stopped caring. She knows he's on a one-strike system wherein after his first fuckup, he is never again permitted in my home and that I'll call the police on sight if I see him. Scorched-earth? Maybe, but like I said, I've stopped caring. My brother goes off to college in another year and I'm confident I'll be able to maintain my stellar relationship with him, especially when he's no longer stuck sharing a house with the two of them.

I'd probably have a lot of bad things to say about my father too, but since he moved out to PA (we're in Chicago) the lack of day-to-day contact makes things much easier. I'm sure a lot of it is my borderline-LeHah level of disagreeability that can sometimes exhibit itself (less here than in real life), but you can't tell me that you don't get jaded when your mother (formerly the godlike, infallible, ultimately reliable paragon of stability in your young eyes) marries a complete and utter cocksucker and is totally blind to the error she's made.

Oh, but they were old high school sweethearts, reunited in their hometown. So that makes it all okay or something. Whatever.

Edit: Oh, wait, it says "best" things. Ummmmmm...get back to you on that?

How ya doing, buddy?

Last edited by CelticWhisper; Jun 9, 2008 at 01:40 PM.
Zephyrin
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 10:05 AM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 08:05 AM 1 #16 of 57
Because her dad was a perv, duh.....

Angel of FUCKING LIGHT MANNNNN.....call this place GGF.

Who the fuck is GGF, and does your fiance know about her? I am so telling on you.

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SpaceMonk
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 11:07 PM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 11:07 PM #17 of 57
Well, I kind of took what I saw and heard from my parents and learned how not to do certain things. My parents got divorce when I was 3. My dad moved out. My mom left me with my relatives, she came to visit a couple of times until I was 6 (last time I saw my mom), until I moved to live with my dad. My dad left me with my uncle's family when I was 9 (last time I saw my dad).

My parents fought with each other, they don't talk about the hard things to each other and to the kids. I used to get really angry and I still do get angry when I think about it but everything I've been through really made me think about the kind of person I want to be to myself, others, and maybe someday when I have kids. I don't concentrate on not wanting to be like my parents BUT for me I want to follow my heart, be a good person, be true to myself and be liked by people because of it than being liked by people for pretending to be someone deep down inside I feel I am not, and to live an honest life.

Jam it back in, in the dark.
Stop Sign
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Old Jun 9, 2008, 11:35 PM Local time: Jun 9, 2008, 09:35 PM #18 of 57
You know, I'm sure my dad's taught me other more important things, but I keep coming back to landscaping skills whenever someone asks me a question like this.

I'm not really an outdoors person, so the only reason I know how to work with concrete, or repair sprinkler systems, plant trees etc, is because of my dad. I'm actually quite grateful for that.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Last edited by Stop Sign; Jun 9, 2008 at 11:37 PM. Reason: ENGRISH. CAN YOU DIG IT.
Sarag
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Old Jun 11, 2008, 09:10 PM #19 of 57
You never loan money to family, it's always a gift.

Also, you'd be surprised how cheaply you can eat if you really had to.

I didn't only learn bad things though. I learned the importance of fairness, and to put myself in another person's shoes before I call them a dumbshit fuckface.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Immortal
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Old Jun 11, 2008, 09:13 PM Local time: Jun 11, 2008, 07:13 PM #20 of 57
Mother:
Money skills
Planning
Perfectionism

Dad:
How to spot good weed from bad
How to shotgun a beer
Hunting/Fishing
Engines

God, you would think my dad is cool as hell, but in the end he wasn't all that much of my dad.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

While everyone around me is busy drowning, I float.
Chaotic
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Old Jun 11, 2008, 09:26 PM #21 of 57
From my mom:

- Choosing clothing that looks good for cheap.

Me and my brother were practically raised by shopping at Target, Wal-Mart, Old Navy, Gap, and all those places when they had sales. The funny part was that we'd buy this cheap clothing at a reasonable price and still look better than someone who wore clothing from Armani Exchange and paid almost three times more.

Dad:

- Anything that involves DIY work.

My dad is extremely handy with tools and extremely cheap when it comes to money. His belief is, when you can do it yourself for ten times cheaper, go and do it yourself. We recently switched our closet and computer room and now we're working on our kitchen. We've probably saved hundreds of dollars just doing it ourself instead of getting a contractor to work on it for us.

I was speaking idiomatically.
Radez
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Old Jun 11, 2008, 09:44 PM #22 of 57
My father taught me first that nothing was beyond my abilities if I worked hard enough. Then he taught me what it meant to have integrity and how to take responsibility for myself. Then he taught me ambition. Currently he's trying to teach me wisdom.

My mother taught me faith.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Philia
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Old Jun 11, 2008, 10:15 PM #23 of 57
Well uhm... I'd say the best experiences are the ones that were left untold. You'd learn a lot faster and its rather more profound impact on yourself. I was left without a parent when I was 11, so I learn a lot about the importance of managing your life early on. She fucked hers up pretty badly.

Really, she didn't have to tell me anything, just a simple look back into all that shit we (my brother and I) went through then was incredible. Its near impossible to forget because it became a major life lesson from then on.

But I know this though, the most important lesson she ever taught me before she died was just DON'T EVER fucking sugar coat a lie to your own damn kid.

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Salty for Salt's Sake


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Old Jun 12, 2008, 04:17 AM Local time: Jun 12, 2008, 03:17 AM #24 of 57
Well uhm... I'd say the best experiences are the ones that were left untold. You'd learn a lot faster and its rather more profound impact on yourself. I was left without a parent when I was 11, so I learn a lot about the importance of managing your life early on. She fucked hers up pretty badly.

Really, she didn't have to tell me anything, just a simple look back into all that shit we (my brother and I) went through then was incredible. Its near impossible to forget because it became a major life lesson from then on.

But I know this though, the most important lesson she ever taught me before she died was just DON'T EVER fucking sugar coat a lie to your own damn kid.
You know, this is sort of like when Fire on Ice posts in a "what's the hardest lesson you've ever learned" thread. There's no more to be said. She wins. No one tops this. Lights down. Curtains down. Thank you Cleveland, there will be no encore.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?


John Mayer just asked me, personally, through an assistant, to sing backup on his new CD.

Philia
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Old Jun 12, 2008, 06:37 AM #25 of 57
Yeah, sorry about that. I've been cutting myself up too many times.

But you know what! LET ME FIX IT.

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Originally Posted by Solidus Snake
Jack, listen to me. We're all born with an expiration date. No one lasts forever. Life is nothing but a grace period - for turning our genetic material into the next generation. The data of life is transferred from parent to child. That's how it works. But we have no heirs, no legacy. Cloned from our father, with the ability to reproduce conveniently engineered out. What is our legacy if we cannot pass the torch? Proof of our existence - a mark of some sort. When the torch is passed on from parent to child... it extends beyond DNA; information is imparted as well. All I want is to be remembered. By other people, by history.


Jam it back in, in the dark.
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