Ask a Delivery Driver

So I work at a Pizza Hut delivering pizzas, and I figured that since other people have done it, I'd join in.

So, what do you want to know about my job? Keep in mind that I can only answer questions related to Pizza Hut. I don't know shit about Domino's or Papa John's.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Uh... yeah.

Um... the concept of "extra cheese" is a lie, isn't it?

There's nowhere I can't reach.

How would he know that, he is only a delivery driver, not a pizza preparation or cooking engineer.

So uh... have you ever gotten shot at while delivering pizza.

How ya doing, buddy?

Pretty much, yeah. What happens is that when somebody orders just a cheese pizza, at least in my store, the taker will put down extra cheese so that the person making the pizza knows that it's JUST a cheese pizza.

EDIT: And my job at delivering actually ecompasses a LOT of things. I answer phones, cut the pizzas, clean, do the dishes, etc. I'm basically a go-to guy when I'm not delivering.

And no, I haven't been shot at.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I was speaking idiomatically.

I was going to ask Brent's question (sort of). I was going to ask if anyone had ever come to the door naked to get their pizza.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

No, no they haven't.

Maybe I should buy a package of condoms....

FELIPE NO

How often are people rude in one way or another when you make a delivery? (Or, for that matter, when they did/didn't get something they didn't want.)

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

What was the lowest ammount you have ever received as a tip?

Most amazing jew boots

Have you ever tried to deliver pizzas as Spider-Man.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

If I were to call and order a pizza what would have to happen to get that pizza for free? Or do pizza men not take bribes?

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

These threads are getting out of control. I mean, all this shit from my thread; for which I got the concept from Chappelle's Show. Then it went ouf of control the Sewers maybe like a year ago, then all those threads got closed. Then for some reason it got popular again in the temp forums, which was cool. Now everyone wants to make a thread for themselves based on their race/religion/nationality/occupation/location/shoesize.

Come on dudes. Surely we have more ideas than this.

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Snowknight

How often are people rude in one way or another when you make a delivery? (Or, for that matter, when they did/didn't get something they didn't want.)

I haven't made too many deliveries yet, but when I have made a mistake, or been rather late on the delivery, the closest that somebody's gotten to rude is "We were wondering when you'd show up!"

Wojo: Remarkably, the lowest amount I have received is no tip at all.

Megalith: I would if I could, but I can't.

andkeener: What would have to happen is a BIG fuckup on our end. For example, on a Friday somebody ordered a carry-out pizza. Long story short, the guy was forced to wait a good hour because one of the drivers had accidentally taken it for delivery. Needless to say, the manager was rather pissed, and the guy in the end got I think that pizza at a discount, and another pizza for free. It also hadn't helped that earlier the pizzas in the oven had been jammed and caught fire (we have a converyer-belt style oven, which lets us put a pizza in one end, it comes out near the cut table on the other), which alone had put us 100 bucks in the hole.

I was speaking idiomatically.

What kind of tip do you expect for a $15 delivery (and do you live in a rural, suburban, or urban area)?

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

It depends on how I did. If I did really well, got your entire order right, got it on time (or before it was due), and if it was busy on top of that, then I would expect up to a 20% tip (and I live in a suburban area).

However, that is rare for me at the moment as I am still familiarizing myself with the area.

FELIPE NO

What's your shortest record time on making a delivery? and what was your longest?

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

What is the highest monetary tip you've received (since we already know you haven't gotten any naked happenings as a bonus)? Also, what was your weirdest customer so far like? One of my friends who delivers pizzas has far too many tales about creepy, hairy men coming to the door mostly naked.

How ya doing, buddy?

Tritoch beat me to it. I wanna hear the biggest tips you got.

Have you ever (or how often) made people who tip less wait longer to get their food? My friends in the delivery/courier business do this all the time, but I never had the chance to ask a pizza guy.

Do specific customers ever request for YOU specifically to deliver a pizza?

What is the most amount of pizzas you had to deliver in one run?

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I want to join in! I deliver pizzas for Thamesford Pizza (Local store, not a big name, has 3 locations lol)

Lowest tip: $0.01
Largest tip: $10

I've had deliveries that take 1-2 mins...i could've walked to the houses, but whatever...
And i've been out for almost an hour sometimes, having alot of people order a the same, and damn out-of-town deliveries.
I think 20 (or close to) pizzas was the most I've had to deliver (it was this party type thing, and the boss was there, he ordered).

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Fatt

Tritoch beat me to it. I wanna hear the biggest tips you got.

Have you ever (or how often) made people who tip less wait longer to get their food? My friends in the delivery/courier business do this all the time, but I never had the chance to ask a pizza guy.

Do specific customers ever request for YOU specifically to deliver a pizza?

What is the most amount of pizzas you had to deliver in one run?

Let's see... I think my biggest tip had been around 5 bucks so far. I dunno, though, I never keep track of that. ^^"

I have never been specifically requested.

I've delivered about 3 or 4 pizzas to one place before, that's my biggest run.

Oh, and GTFO my thread, Dinner. >=(

How ya doing, buddy?

You don't have any experience with this. How long have you been a driver? Long enough to justify a thread?

I was speaking idiomatically.

....I plead the 5th? ;_:

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Ok, since he pleads the 5th and I probably have more experience than he does, I would be glad to also field some questions. Might be interesting if we live in different environments.

Originally Posted by AliceNWondrland

I was going to ask Brent's question (sort of). I was going to ask if anyone had ever come to the door naked to get their pizza.

Not entirely naked, but I have had a teenage kid come to the door in his underwear while he was on the phone with his girlfriend. He made me wait while he signed his check so I had to sit and listen to them talk. It was kind of disturbing.

Originally Posted by Snowknight

How often are people rude in one way or another when you make a delivery? (Or, for that matter, when they did/didn't get something they didn't want.)

Most people are generally nice to me. In my town, we have roads that are often cut off by dead ends and then continue with the same name a few blocks away. I wasn't sure which section she was in, so I called the lady and asked her where she was located. She promptly started to yell at me and then hung up. I tried to call her back, but she wouldn't answer. When I finally found the place, it turns out that she had called my manager and yelled at them, because I "used up her pre-paid cell phone minutes", until she got a free pizza. She was about the rudest customer that I have had.

Originally Posted by Wojo

What was the lowest ammount you have ever received as a tip?

I have been stiffed on a tip many times. By now, we pretty much now which houses are ones that will always stiff you and we usually compete with each other so that we don't have to take these runs.

There was one time when I delived about 35 pizzas to a car sales lot. It was about a $150 dollar order and I got completely stiffed on the tip. Need less to say, I wanted to go back and let all the air out of the tires.

Originally Posted by RacinReaver

What kind of tip do you expect for a $15 delivery (and do you live in a rural, suburban, or urban area)?

If it was $15 dollars and some change, I would probably assume that the person would just give me $17 dollars and I would be fine with that. At Dominoes, we have the 555 deal and the total would come to $16.98. From that, most people would just end up giving me a twenty and I really liked that. They were quite popular and the $3 dollar tips add up real fast.

Oh, and I live in a suburban area, so sometimes a good amount of driving is required.

Originally Posted by Tritoch

What is the highest monetary tip you've received (since we already know you haven't gotten any naked happenings as a bonus)?

As far as I can remember, the most I have gotten as a tip was 10 dollars, from a $90 some dollar order to a birthday party.

Originally Posted by Fatt

Have you ever (or how often) made people who tip less wait longer to get their food? My friends in the delivery/courier business do this all the time, but I never had the chance to ask a pizza guy.

Do specific customers ever request for YOU specifically to deliver a pizza?

What is the most amount of pizzas you had to deliver in one run?

Sometimes, if I knew I was going to a place that has always been a horrible tipper. I usually just take my time to get there. If I know there good tippers, I'll usually try and get it there alot faster.

The only one that's ever asked for me specifically was my mom and my aunt once.

I delivered...50 pizzas, I believe it was, to a high school for some student function they were having once.

FELIPE NO

How many orders do you get for Cheesy bites?

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

I've always been curious about those triangular lighted up signs you stick on your car roof. How do you stick them on and what powers the light, a DD battery? Has one ever fallen off?

Jam it back in, in the dark.