Worst Advertising Slogans

Originally Posted by El Ray Fernando

"I'm so proud of it, I put my name on it"

But George Foreman's a legend. George Foreman > You

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Phoque le PQ

- "vroom, vroom", from mazda. that kid is annoying.

That's actually "Zoom, zoom..." and a friend of mine who lives up in Three Rivers was the one who came up with that whole marketing campaign for Mazda and it was actually a pretty catchy thing. It was originally only meant to be for the RX-7, but they just kind of moved that over to the rest of their vehicle line.

As for the worst marketing tools EVER used for anything? Well... Just look at this:



No really... Think about the mindrape that this was for everyone who saw this! A genetically deformed rat with the dental structure of a bum who sucks dick for crack is singing off-key and telling me to buy a "toasty sub"?

Nuh uh, nigga. You're on your own. :/

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by alkaline

"Do What Feels Right" -- Wendys

I'm sorry Wendys. I don't want to "do" a double classic with cheese no matter how delicious it is.

That actually reminds me of some fast-food placed that used "I'd hit it." or something similar to that as their tagline for a commercial or two. Then maybe they realized what that meant.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by Tenacious D

I think

"Wake up with the King" is a pretty bad one. Burger King breakfasts suck, too.

Okay, seriously, that entire ad campaign scared the crap out of me. That King was creepy as Hell, especially in the early days, when he would wake up in a random guy's bed, or be in the back of a dude's car. I was watching SNL one night, and that commercial (with the King in the back of some guy's car) came on, and it came on in a way that I thought it was an SNL mock ad. But then... there was no laugh track... and it was a real ad. It was ridiculous.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Disney commercials are pretty fucking annoying: "Imagineer that!" What the hell are they even advertising?

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

HBO. "It's not TV, it's HBO." What the hell? I get pissed off every time I hear that. What, do they send out a signal that pipes directly into your brain or something? Does it appear in the sky? No! It comes on TV! With all the other channels. It just makes them seem stuck up. Well, until they invent a method that doesn't involve TV to air their programming, this slogan is shit.

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by Admiral Amara

Okay, seriously, that entire ad campaign scared the crap out of me. That King was creepy as Hell, especially in the early days, when he would wake up in a random guy's bed, or be in the back of a dude's car. I was watching SNL one night, and that commercial (with the King in the back of some guy's car) came on, and it came on in a way that I thought it was an SNL mock ad. But then... there was no laugh track... and it was a real ad. It was ridiculous.

Yeah, I would find it terrifying if I woke up and that giant king head man was under the covers next to me. The football ones with the King weren't too bad, though.

Originally Posted by Encephalon

No really... Think about the mindrape that this was for everyone who saw this! A genetically deformed rat with the dental structure of a bum who sucks dick for crack is singing off-key and telling me to buy a "toasty sub"?

Nuh uh, nigga. You're on your own. :/

[eardrumburstingscreech]EAT QUIZNOS SUBS[/eardrumburstingscreech]

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Apparently those little hellions are called spongmonkeys, created by Joel Veitch in 2004. Some drunken quiznos exec saw the "We love the moon" video online and called Veitch for the rights to use them in an add. He must have been HAMMERED! Those things always creeped the shit out of me, I hate those little evil buggers! They look alot like this band in fact, Death From Above 1979, well, maybe only the one on the right...lol


Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Tenacious D

I think
"Wake up with the King" is a pretty bad one. Burger King breakfasts suck, too.

Hah! That one was rather creepy. Actually, I didn't really like McDonald's new slogan either. I preferred the "We Love to See You Smile!" one better. Taco Bell's "It's good to go!" is also annoying. Every time I hear that line, my opinion of Taco Bell drops. It's even worse with the hand motion from the commercials.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Ah, 1956, when the American Meat Institute was every diligent in reminding the public in the ehtical and moral merits of MEAT

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

"If it doesn't get all over the place, it doesn't belong in your face."

Yeah, and then Paris started acting for Carl's Jr.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Qwest, the midwest telecommunications company, had the slogan "That's our Spirit of Service". Then there was a big joke that they only give service in spirit, because they're known for having AWFUL customer service. Then they changed it to "Our Spirit of Service in Action". Good Times.
I also hate Subway's slogan "Eat Fresh", but love to make fun of it saying "Eat Flesh".
Kay, a local jeweler, uses "Every Kiss begins with Kay", and I hate that they think they own every kiss. Bastards.
Slim Jim a whil eback had those "EAT ME!" with the guy dressed as a slim jim popping out of the wrapper.
"That's Comcastic" is also pretty annoying for our cable company.
What about Nintendo's old slogans? "Now you're Playing with Power", or "Play it Loud".
Give me a week and I'll come up with an even longer post.
I really hate ads. Marketing is so not cool.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by shadowlink56

Kay, a local jeweler, uses "Every Kiss begins with Kay", and I hate that they think they own every kiss. Bastards.

Well, "kiss" technically begins with the letter "k"... so it's a phonetic pun. That still doesn't make me want to but a diamond.

Quote:

Marketing is so not cool.

Yeah, all those marketing people are so not cool... ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Come on everybody, say it!
"SET IT AND FORGET IT!"


FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by shadowlink56

Kay, a local jeweler, uses "Every Kiss begins with Kay", and I hate that they think they own every kiss. Bastards.

Kay is a local jeweler for me too, but around here not every kiss begins with "Kay". Every blowjob on the other hand... >__>

Quote:

Marketing is so not cool.

Says those of you who purchase no consumer goods. I, on the other hand, make my living off of it and you know what? I'm not complaining.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by ElectricSheep

Ah, 1956, when the American Meat Institute was every diligent in reminding the public in the ehtical and moral merits of MEAT

Mmmmm. That really makes me want a hamburger! :sick:

Originally Posted by shadowlink56

Kay, a local jeweler, uses "Every Kiss begins with Kay", and I hate that they think they own every kiss. Bastards.

I acually liked that one. It sounds even better in song mode. At least it isn't something like, "We have awesome diamonds!"

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by shadowlink56

Qwest, the midwest telecommunications company, had the slogan "That's our Spirit of Service". Then there was a big joke that they only give service in spirit, because they're known for having AWFUL customer service. Then they changed it to "Our Spirit of Service in Action". Good Times.
I also hate Subway's slogan "Eat Fresh", but love to make fun of it saying "Eat Flesh".
Kay, a local jeweler, uses "Every Kiss begins with Kay", and I hate that they think they own every kiss. Bastards.
Slim Jim a whil eback had those "EAT ME!" with the guy dressed as a slim jim popping out of the wrapper.
"That's Comcastic" is also pretty annoying for our cable company.
What about Nintendo's old slogans? "Now you're Playing with Power", or "Play it Loud".
Give me a week and I'll come up with an even longer post.
I really hate ads. Marketing is so not cool.

Funny thing about those Qwest commercials that I noticed. At first the people saying the slogan always sounded like they were saying "Inaction". Lately I've noticed that they've put a definate pause between "In" and "Action".

Too bad the morons only realized this about a month late.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

You think these are bad, try living overseas and watching the commercials they'll play on AFN (which stands for Armed or American Forces Network, I believe). My older brother jokes how he should've recorded these when our family lived over in Germany so he could play them to his kids as a form of punishment. Here's one example:

The commercial is two Navy chicks playing racquetball, and the one girl goes 'You're off your game today. Is everything all right?' the other one goes 'There's this guy at work; he's been asking me out out, making these, you know, suggestive remarks. It's just getting to me, you know.'

Girl 1: 'Have you tried talking to him about it at all?'

Girl 2: 'No. I just figured... ya know. Well what if I tell him, and he doesn't stop?'

Girl 1: 'Then you report him. I'm sure he'd rather hear it from you than from his supervisor.'

Girl 2: 'Yeah, yeah, you're right. I'll talk to him about it first thing tomorrow. It's your serve.'

Grade F acting on junk like this. And sexual harassment isn't the only thing. Try three years as a 10-13 year old with commercials being nothing but stuff like this or junk about writing bad checks, wearing every piece of safety gear known to man, contacting your legal assistance office, etc.

I would've leapt for joy back then at seeing TV ads for the stuff you guys are saying is crap. Seriously. That's how bad these AFN commercials are. They'd beat just about every single one of these, hands down.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Another one that pisses me off is CBS with their 'Welcome home' slogan. I don't if they still use it (since I barely watch CBS anymore), but it angered me to no end when they were using it, since it makes no freaking sense.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?