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If you kids don't stop fighting, I'm going to stop this car and leave you here!
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I poked it and it made a sad sound
Struttin'


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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:00 AM #1 of 37
If you kids don't stop fighting, I'm going to stop this car and leave you here!

Some posh well-to-do mother in Scarsdale, NY actually did it.

Apparently, her two daughters (10 and 12) were fighting in the back seat. Mom pulled over the car and kicked the two out at a shopping center and left.

What do you think of this? Did the mother do something awful, or did she just follow through on a threat? Should she be arrested? Was there truly any severe trauma done to the children through this incident in your opinion?

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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:16 AM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 04:16 PM #2 of 37
Ha ha, I think the best bit was where she called the police to report the younger one missing.

It was probably a bit extreme to drive all the way home, I think chucking them out and driving round the block would have been enough to shut them up.

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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:26 AM #3 of 37
Precisely, I don't see anything wrong with leaving them for a few minutes for the sake of a scare, but to go home without them and then call in the police to clean up your mess?

If you want the state to take care of your kids for you, lady, they've got programs for that.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Zergrinch
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:29 AM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 11:29 PM #4 of 37
She chose the wrong threat to follow up on. Without any further information on the circumstances, I'll have to conclude that it would be a rather traumatic experience for a 10 year old.

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Musharraf
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:32 AM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 05:32 PM #5 of 37
That's cool, parents leaving their children seem to be en vogue these days

German children abandoned in Italian pizzeria after parents go out to smoke

I was speaking idiomatically.
ComradeTande
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:36 AM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 09:36 AM 1 #6 of 37
Quote:
The girl gave police her mother's name and their address in well-to-do Scarsdale, and they asked Scarsdale police to check Primoff's $2 million house. Shortly afterward, Primoff called Scarsdale police from home to say the 10-year-old was missing, said Scarsdale Detective Lt. Bryant Clark.
Kids were most likely spoiled beyond repair, this was the last straw...?


Also, might as well follow up on your threats if you are gonna hand them out. But I wouldn't have actually LEFT the kids, maybe shove them out, wait thirty seconds and then tell them to scramble back in before I ACTUALLY leave them.

I'd say this falls in the traumatic child event graph between Losing Your Parent in Walmart and Seeing Your Parents Do It

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Midna
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 10:45 AM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 08:45 AM #7 of 37
It was probably a bit extreme to drive all the way home, I think chucking them out and driving round the block would have been enough to shut them up.
This is exactly what I was going to say. I think it would have made a pretty good impact on them if they had seen her pull away at all.

Also, I'm a little surprised the 12 year-old left the 10 year-old. I'm an older sister and as a kid was pretty protective of my little sis. Doubt I'd have left her alone to go looking for mom. (No, I am not BLAMING the 12 year-old. Simply find it odd is all.)


Originally Posted by Tande
Kids were most likely spoiled beyond repair, this was the last straw...?
Just because they have a nice house doesn't mean the kids are spoiled. Siblings fight and annoy the shit out of their parents, rich or poor.

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Struttin'


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Old Apr 22, 2009, 11:50 AM #8 of 37
Kids were most likely spoiled beyond repair, this was the last straw...?
Why would you assume this?

Like Midna said, siblings fight no matter WHAT their parents' social standings are. Kids fight with their siblings. This is life, Tande.

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Timberwolf8889
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 11:58 AM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 05:58 PM #9 of 37
Though I sound like a broken record I agree that it's a bit extreme to leave the kids out there and drive all the way back. That's crossing the line between temporarily appearing to be a bad parent in order to scare kids and actually being a bad parent and scaring your kids. Maybe if the girls were a bit older it wouldn't bug me so much but I'd be scared shitless if my parents just kicked me out of the car at some shopping center when I was 10.

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Fluffykitten McGrundlepuss
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 12:00 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 06:00 PM #10 of 37
I dunno if I'd have been scared shitless, I'd probably have just started walking home. I used to walk a good mile and a half to school on my own at that age so it's not an insurmountable distance. I did grow up in a very friendly, middle class town with no crime though.

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ComradeTande
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 12:09 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 11:09 AM #11 of 37
Why would you assume this?

Like Midna said, siblings fight no matter WHAT their parents' social standings are. Kids fight with their siblings. This is life, Tande.
Rich American parents. Maybe I'm a bit biased but every kid I've seen that's come from that mixture has turned out spoiled rotten.

And I know siblings fight, I had three brothers. But we never got to that extent to where my parents had to throw us out of the van. Obviously the mother isn't very stable.

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Bradylama
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 12:31 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 12:31 PM #12 of 37
Parent tells child her face would freeze like that, child later found with severe burns

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Peter
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 12:48 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 07:48 PM #13 of 37
Haha, my mum actually did this to me and my brother once, about 2 kilometres from our home when I was 12-13, and he was two years younger than me. We just walked home, and as far as I know we weren't traumatized (although this didn't happen in the city as we live in the middle of nowhere). Granted, 3 miles is quite the distance, but this isn't something that will scar you for life. If you want threats to be effective, now or in the future, you better follow through on them once in a while. The article is pretty shitty though, what is the relevance of noting that they live in a 2million dollar house?

I was speaking idiomatically.
Secret Squirrel
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 12:57 PM 6 #14 of 37
Quote:
"...upper-crust New York suburb..."
"...well-to-do Scarsdale..."
"...Primoff's $2 million house..."
That's what I got from the article. It seems like the whole point of this story was to give the ComradeTandes of the world something to seethe about.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
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RacinReaver
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 01:09 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 11:09 AM #15 of 37
I want to give this parent a

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Jessykins
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 02:34 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 12:34 PM #16 of 37
Why point a finger at the children? Spoiled or not, their mother left them the fuck behind. Just having money doesn't necessarily make your kids spoiled, nor (clearly) does it make you any more capable of raising them.

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Midna
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 02:58 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 12:58 PM #17 of 37
Rich American parents. Maybe I'm a bit biased but every kid I've seen that's come from that mixture has turned out spoiled rotten.
Tande, come on. This is a ridiculous overstatement.

Jam it back in, in the dark.
ziggythecat
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Old Apr 22, 2009, 03:51 PM Local time: Apr 22, 2009, 02:51 PM #18 of 37
I automatically think of all the crap that could've happened to my kid if I did that and it freaks me the hell out.

BUT my son is not old enough to annoy me to the point that I would want to do something like this. So even though I'd love to be the first to cast a stone, I can't.

In theory, I have no problem with this form of "punishment". Kids get away with way too much crap (I'm generalizing based on what I've seen) and there's no harm in freaking a kid out to prove a point as long as you don't do some really stupid crap like say, NEVER COME BACK! Where the lady missed the mark was just washing her hands of the whole thing. Some folks just shouldn't have kids.

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Old Apr 23, 2009, 07:25 AM Local time: Apr 23, 2009, 08:55 AM 1 #19 of 37
This is a threat that was actually followed through by my parents with my younger brother when he was 9 years old. We were driving to my community where my mom had grown up in, and my younger brother was being very mean and belligerent to our mom. So we were driving in the middle of nowhere, so my dad had stopped the car told my younger brother to get out and he actually drove away.

Not very far, mind you, just far away enough to have my younger brother run back to the vehicle as quickly as possible. My dad then asked him if he was going to behave, and he said he was going to behave.

I do agree with Shin's statement

Quote:
It was probably a bit extreme to drive all the way home, I think chucking them out and driving round the block would have been enough to shut them up.
The thing is that, if you make a threat you have to make good on that threat because the moment you go back on any kind of threat or punishment that just gives a kid more grounds to think what they're doing is ok. In my experience they'll actually take advantage of it.

It doesn't matter whether or not your rich, or what kind of neighborhood you live it. Your still a parent and you have to do what you feel is best for the kids.

I think with this lady, she kind of had the right idea but she went a little too far in terms of trying to prove her point. Thankfully nothing horrible happened to these little girls.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
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Old Apr 23, 2009, 11:55 AM Local time: Apr 23, 2009, 09:55 AM #20 of 37
Tande, come on. This is a ridiculous overstatement.
You be quiet. We're all about sweeping generalizations here.

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Old Apr 23, 2009, 12:29 PM #21 of 37
That's what I got from the article. It seems like the whole point of this story was to give the ComradeTandes of the world something to seethe about.
Class warfare, am I right

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Old Apr 23, 2009, 01:37 PM #22 of 37
When I was 12, my mother dragged me down to the local jail and had the cops toss me in the slammer for six hours just because I stole a few dollars from her purse. I thought it was a joke until the door slammed shut and everyone walked out. Shit scared me straight real quick.

I honestly think more parents should take these things into their own hands and dole out some frightening punishments for misbehavior. You don't have to damage the child, just shock them. Fuck the wimps who think they'll be traumatized for life and such things constitute mental abuse. I think most of the world's criminals and punks would be better people if someone in their lives had scared the ever-loving shit out of them early enough.

Getting the cops involved was kind of stupid here, but otherwise this woman deserves a medal for following through on her threat.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Ah! Amoeba
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Old Apr 23, 2009, 01:54 PM Local time: Apr 23, 2009, 01:54 PM #23 of 37
Quote:
Getting the cops involved was kind of stupid here, but otherwise this woman deserves a medal for following through on her threat.
More moms need to make themselves gold metals.

I know I wouldn't fuck with a mom who wears a massive gold medallion around her neck that reads "I FOLLOW THROUGH ON MY THREATS."

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Old Apr 23, 2009, 04:06 PM #24 of 37
When I was 12, my mother dragged me down to the local jail and had the cops toss me in the slammer for six hours just because I stole a few dollars from her purse. I thought it was a joke until the door slammed shut and everyone walked out. Shit scared me straight real quick.
My mother would've just spanked me like a normal person.

Although her mother used a more proactive approach and put mouse traps in her purse.

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Old Apr 23, 2009, 05:02 PM #25 of 37
For all these anecdotes of "my parents were assholes, therefore I became an upright citizen", you'd think my dad's belt buckle would have guaranteed my entry into MIT

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