[News] Project Needledick - All New 2D Sonic game

Here's a big surprise: it'll be DSiWare or for PC.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I'm predicting App Store.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Maybe this is the big launch title the Phantom has been waiting for.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Sonic 4.

So they admit everything that came after Sonic 3 & Knuckles doesn't exist.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Soluzar

Oh... and the robot.

You say anything bad about E-102 Gamma and I'll cut you. Sonic's had a ton of terrible new characters over the years, pretty much all of them after Tails and Knuckles, but Gamma's levels were fun.

I've never been a big Sonic fan, so I don't really care about this one unless it turns out to be good. Rush and Rush Adventure were alright, so it's possible.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by SuperSonic

but there's a 4th system that they have yet to announce it for.

Surprise! Sega is releasing another video game system and this will be their launch title.

:|

FELIPE NO

The number one way to trick people into buying a bad game is to make it a numbered entry in a series that was once good.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by Ah! Amiga

Sonic 4.

So they admit everything that came after Sonic 3 & Knuckles doesn't exist.

I'll miss one thing from the 'everything' past S&K3: The Chao-raising mini-game. That thing was dangerously addictive.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Prime Blue

The number one way to trick people into buying a bad game is to make it a numbered entry in a series that was once good.

The upshot of course being that they can only try it once.

Hear that, Sonic? This is it. Your last chance.

Italics.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Ah! Amiga

The upshot of course being that they can only try it once.

Really? Could have fooled me.



This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

You know I'm talking about the sleight of hand of releasing plenty of unnumbered installments and then, after a long interlude, finally reverting to the old sequence in a triumphant cry of "Ah ah! But Now we mean business!"

Most amazing jew boots

And since 2003 there have been numerous FF spin offs but only one numbered game in 2006 and another one due out in a month. In both of those interludes there was piles upon piles of offshot shit. They've done it more than once. And it seems to be working for them.

And SEGA is going to do it more than once with Sonic. They've just got a much longer fuck-you-in-the-ass time frame going on. I'm sure as soon as they figure out it will work, they'll do it more often.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Krelian

I'm predicting App Store.

Since they've already put at least one Sonic game on there that wouldn't be at all surprising.

Also, Episode 1, really? I like how they've realised that no one will buy a full Sonic title any more, but if they release a regular sized game in 6 small chunks all priced $10, well what do you know.

I have more faith in Sonic Mario Kart Racing than this. I mean, yeah it's great and all that they've gone back to do a side-scrolling title and ditched the huge assortment of random characters they had, but they've been so out of touch with what made Sonic work for so long I doubt they can pull it off even when they're vaguely attempting the right thing. I'm willing to be proven wrong, I just don't see it happening.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Eh, the Rush games weren't too bad and the first Advance title was pretty decent, so it's not like they can't make a good 2D offering, they've just been too busy focusing on everything that's wrong with the series for entirely too long.

FELIPE NO

Leaked Gameplay Videos

It looks...okay. It just reminds me of the DS games except it's on one large screen instead of two little screens.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Yeah, I was watching a couple of those videos earlier. It seems like Sonic's sense of speed which made the first three games great seem to be lost in this... It's like he's just skipping along the course.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I almost feel sorry for the Chetards today. They never cope very well with our April Fools pranks at the best of times, this must be like hell for them.

no homo

The speed of the animation are too slow, as soon as it got that classic blurrfeet it looked quite good. But at the start up looks weird i agree.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Would it be uncharitable of me to suggest that if it bothers 'em so much, they're welcome to find another forum without such shenanigans? I am not saying I want anyone to leave, but then... I can't bring myself to feel too much sympathy for anyone who can't take a fucking joke.

How ya doing, buddy?

Here's my nomination:

Lady Gaga - Bad Romance

I was speaking idiomatically.

The leaked video of the mine cart level is the worst fucking thing I've ever seen.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Is this a birthday thread or an invitation?

Additional Spam:
Let's see if this one moves.

FELIPE NO

Damn Chz thought of everything

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

I'D JUST LIKE TO LET EVERYONE KNOW THAT YES, I AM A MASSIVE FLAMING HOMO AND MY FAVOURITE FOOD EVER IS SEMEN

Edit: lolz best event ever

How ya doing, buddy?

I'm glad these tests of the system have proven educational

There's nowhere I can't reach.