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Uwe Boll
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Musharraf
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:08 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 01:08 PM #1 of 22
Thumbs down Uwe Boll

Dr. Uwe Boll

So what's your opinion about him and his "masterpieces"?

In my opinion, his movies are extremely bad, maybe not as bad as most Paul W.S. Anderson movies (this man is a fukken retard), but still, I would never ever buy one of his movies on DVD. I would get one if they offered me money, maybe.

I still wonder a) why he always gets the money to produce a new flick, b) why there are so many famous actors starring in his movies (see Bloodrayne)

P.S. I don't expect anyone to actually adore his stuff, but I'm interested in the "why".

Jam it back in, in the dark.
Rock
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:18 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 02:18 PM #2 of 22
I don't know, but after watching these "Dinner with Uwe" clips from IGN, I gotta admit that I like the guy. He might not be the best director, but he's a damn good producer and businessman.

I don't really like his movies, but at least I'm convinced he's passioned and having a fun time doing them.

Damn, I'd like to talk to Uwe Boll. He seems to be a real nice guy. Somebody should tell him to register here at GFF. He might just do it. Why lie.

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Last edited by Rock; Mar 3, 2006 at 07:20 AM.
Musharraf
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:20 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 01:20 PM #3 of 22
"Dinner with Uwe" haha, that's great.
Thanks for the link, dude!

Jesus, the accent!!

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Rock
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:21 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 02:21 PM #4 of 22
I absolutely adore his accent. He's ruining it for us all ...

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Eleo
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:22 AM #5 of 22
I've actually never seen any of them.

And holy shit yes his films are worse than Paul W.S. Anderson what are you, on dope?

I was speaking idiomatically.
Musharraf
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:25 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 01:25 PM #6 of 22
What Anderson did with Alien Vs. Predator was a crime in the history of filmmaking in my opinion, buy okay, I can see your point.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Six Machine
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 07:50 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 05:50 AM #7 of 22
Uwe Boll churns out some terrible movies. I have no idea how he still manages to grab the rights to so many games. Do video game developers not watch movies ever?

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Infernal Monkey
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 08:10 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 11:10 PM #8 of 22
I've never seen a Eww Bowels directed video game based movie. Possibly because none of them even get released here, but I hear they're all bloody dreadful, which is good! That's the way video game movies should be done.


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bishop743
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 08:19 AM #9 of 22
Uwe Boll is one of the worst directors of all time. Without question. Every single game to movie adaptation he's done has turned our horribly. You'd think that with each movie, a director would start to get better at his craft but with him it's the exact opposite. He continues to get worse and worse. I'm just glad Hideo Kojima owned him when he said he'd NEVER consider giving Boll rights to do a movie based on Metal Gear Solid. As long as he continues making movies based on games I don't care about, I'm good.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Last edited by bishop743; Mar 3, 2006 at 08:05 PM.
dagget
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 08:36 AM #10 of 22
Originally Posted by Infernal Monkey

"AH, DOUBLE DRAGON, SO GOOD TO SEE YOU"

Is that and SMB on DVD in the $5 bin at wal-mart yet?

Besides Monkie, is DD truly worse than:

?

On topic, I don't know how the hell Uwe Bolle gets all the people he does to make his movies.

Of course, even as shitty as his movies are, you have to respect him. I mean, he is making movies and shitty or not, that's what he loves doing...:lolsign:

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Eleo
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 08:38 AM #11 of 22
Originally Posted by Musharraf
What Anderson did with Alien Vs. Predator was a crime in the history of filmmaking in my opinion, buy okay, I can see your point.
Yes he killed two franchises at once, but both of them had their time and were essentially already dead. Alien 3 and Alien: Resurrection basically said, "hay oops guess Aliens was the pinnacle of me!" and Predator 2 wasn't even for real. (Even still, Jurassic Park thought that the next step up from a jungle was a city even though I recall the city being fairly deserted in either movie). I mean, you can't tarnish the reputation of Alien or Aliens or Predator with Alien vs Predator because those films stand on their own. They don't even know each other.

Uwe Boll on the other hand takes games and wipes his ass with them. It's not the same. Surely the games stand on their own, but games have a bad enough reputation as it is. Don't need anymore people to think, "Man, video games must be dumb shit." And yes, Resident Evil and Resident Evil: apocalypse was dumb shit but they're C- grade. Any Uwe Boll movie is an automatic F minus minus. Those Sci-Fi Channel "original" movies have better production values.

If you watch Alien vs Predator and think, "man, the originals must be dumb shit" then Jesus will descend from the heavens and just kick you right in the nuts, right in front of everyone.

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dagget
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 09:09 AM #12 of 22
Alien vs Predator was, to me, better than I had originally thought it would be. Same with Freddy vs Jason, but that's another thread another time.

Uwe Boll has stated before that he doesn't care about the video games themselves, it's just an excuse for him to make a movie. I saw the poster for that new one he did. What the fuck was it called... uhm oh yeah King's Field or some shit. The poster looks like it was shot the same way Druids was. (and Druids was a huge steaming pile)

No, Uwe Boll can't make a movie and apparently the people that he hires to do editing don't know shit either. Look at Alone in the Dark. Near the end of the movie, some chick gets killed. Before the scene fade/cuts away... the camera shows her clearly getting the fuck up off the floor!! what the hell is that shit? It's called bad movie making.

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Misogynyst Gynecologist
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 09:23 AM #13 of 22
Infernal Monkey has the best sig I have ever seen in the history of the intarweb.

You all do realize that Uwe Boll is EXACTLY what Hollywood has always wanted? Not in terms of lack of creativity - but the fact that he can make complete fucking crap - horrible, horrible crap - and turn a profit. Theres no more risk in making movies, doing it his way. If Stanley Kubrick or Terrance Malick were making movies like this, it would be a great thing for film.

I was speaking idiomatically.
MinionOfCthulhu
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 09:28 AM #14 of 22
Originally Posted by Six Machine
Uwe Boll churns out some terrible movies. I have no idea how he still manages to grab the rights to so many games. Do video game developers not watch movies ever?
I was under the impression that he made his movies terrible on purpose as some sort of exploit of German tax loophole sort of thing. Kind of like The Producers.
Thanks a lot, Germany.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Infernal Monkey
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 09:49 AM Local time: Mar 4, 2006, 12:49 AM #15 of 22
Originally Posted by dagget
Is that and SMB on DVD in the $5 bin at wal-mart yet?
Forget the $5 part, they're just in the bin!

Quote:
Besides Monkie, is DD truly worse than:

?
Oh my no. ;_; Double Dragon at least has giant fat head muscle guy falling over backwards. Street Fighter has cancer.

FELIPE NO
VermillionFF7
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 11:00 AM #16 of 22
Uwe Boll is the worst thing to come out of Germany since Hitler.

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Musharraf
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 11:14 AM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 05:14 PM #17 of 22
I wonder how often I have to say it again: Hitler didn't come out of Germany. But well, the comparison is okay, I guess.

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Misogynyst Gynecologist
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 11:18 AM #18 of 22
Originally Posted by Vermillion
Uwe Boll is the worst thing to come out of Germany since Hitler.
Goodwin's Law is now in effect thanks to this, asshole. Way to ruin the intarweb.

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Six Machine
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 12:01 PM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 10:01 AM #19 of 22
Originally Posted by MinionOfCthulhu
I was under the impression that he made his movies terrible on purpose as some sort of exploit of German tax loophole sort of thing. Kind of like The Producers.
Thanks a lot, Germany.
Really? If true, that would be the best thing since anything ever period.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Musharraf
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 12:19 PM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 06:19 PM #20 of 22
Well, what he said is true. German government encourages German filmmakers to, well, make films, you know. They spend a couple of million dollars each year, that's what I read.

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Six Machine
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 12:39 PM Local time: Mar 3, 2006, 10:39 AM #21 of 22
Here we go:

Quote:
But crucially, the bizarre tax laws in Germany mean that any wealthy Germans who invest in a movie can write-off the production cost, delay paying their taxes and generally reduce their tax burden. When you disseminate all the boring legal business law surrounding it the bottom line is this – the German investors in a movie only pay tax on any RETURNS the movie makes, their investment is 100% deductible, so the minute the movie makes a profit, said investor has to start paying tax. Plus the investors can actually borrow money to put towards investment and write that off too. Assuming you’re a sharp enough businessman you have a potential goldmine in the making; a way to make money from investing in bad movies...
Source

Another article said they're planning on closing the loophole which would in essence end his reign of terror. Let's hope it goes through.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Last edited by Six Machine; Mar 3, 2006 at 12:41 PM.
Swordstalker
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Old Mar 3, 2006, 12:53 PM #22 of 22
Uwe Boll is amazing =0

I mean, ...he makes bad movies , noone likes them.
And still he gets people like Christain Slater to work with him,
and somehow he always gets money for it.

PS:
AvP was even worse, a predator doesnt fight like a mixture of Jackie Chan and the Power Rangers.

PPS:
he may be from Germany, but we dont want him.
You want? Just take him =0

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Last edited by Swordstalker; Mar 3, 2006 at 12:56 PM.
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