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Question for the girls
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Smoodle
The real NanaMan


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Old Mar 4, 2006, 08:07 PM Local time: Mar 4, 2006, 06:07 PM #1 of 127
Question for the girls

I'm wondering, if a guy you don't know comes up to you and asks for a date/phone number, are you disturbed or annoyed by this? Also, considering you are single and you're physically attracted to the guy, would you ever consider his request?

I'm just wondering, since it seems like so many girls are afraid to go on a date with a guy they've never met ... but isn't that the point of a date? To get to know each other?

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Last edited by Smoodle; Mar 5, 2006 at 02:33 AM.
Lady Miyomi
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Old Mar 4, 2006, 11:14 PM #2 of 127
Hey, Smoodle. I think I can answer your questions, however, don't loop me in with the rest of the girls, OK?

Yes, I get annoyed when dudes ask me for my phone number/do you have a man/can I take you out. The reason why is mainly the type of guys it is. It's usually guys I see "shopping around" for other girls and sometimes they're the same ones that talk bad about other women. I also get hit on by older pieces of crap that have no business asking anybody out. I haven't seen a decent one guy step to me yet (not like I want one to...), but that's a long story.

I think a lot of other girls are afraid to go on dates with guys they've never met is because they don't want to appear like they're easy or something...at least, that's what I hear one of my ex-friends say. I don't date because I don't want to right now and I'm too busy.

There's nowhere I can't reach.
I poked it and it made a sad sound
Struttin'


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 12:11 AM #3 of 127
I'd say that just walking up to a girl and asking for her number is completely bizarre, yea. You don't even know who she is. Maybe you should attempt a conversation before you go asking for girls' numbers based just on whatever you see in passing.

Strike up a conversation before you ask for a number, guys. =/

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Lady Miyomi
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 12:24 AM #4 of 127
Amen, Sassumomo!

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?
Chibi Neko
The hell am I doing here?


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 12:55 AM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 02:25 AM #5 of 127
If a random hot guy came up to me asking for my phone number, I would say I would like get to know him first, like go to a gathering with him or something. If we develop trust, then I would give my phone number, but not without getting his first.

I was speaking idiomatically.
Smoodle
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 02:21 AM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 12:21 AM #6 of 127
Originally Posted by Sassafrass
I'd say that just walking up to a girl and asking for her number is completely bizarre, yea. You don't even know who she is. Maybe you should attempt a conversation before you go asking for girls' numbers based just on whatever you see in passing.

Strike up a conversation before you ask for a number, guys. =/
Whoa, don't accuse me. I've never done that. I'm just asking a question.

Double Post:
Originally Posted by Lady Miyomi
Hey, Smoodle. I think I can answer your questions, however, don't loop me in with the rest of the girls, OK?

Yes, I get annoyed when dudes ask me for my phone number/do you have a man/can I take you out. The reason why is mainly the type of guys it is. It's usually guys I see "shopping around" for other girls and sometimes they're the same ones that talk bad about other women. I also get hit on by older pieces of crap that have no business asking anybody out. I haven't seen a decent one guy step to me yet (not like I want one to...), but that's a long story.

I think a lot of other girls are afraid to go on dates with guys they've never met is because they don't want to appear like they're easy or something...at least, that's what I hear one of my ex-friends say. I don't date because I don't want to right now and I'm too busy.
Ok, so let me ask you this: You say you've never had a decent guy ask yet, but how do you know this if you don't know him? How do you judge these guys at first? I'm guessing most of them come off as very cocky, am I right?

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Last edited by Smoodle; Mar 5, 2006 at 02:33 AM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
kat
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 05:28 AM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 03:28 AM #7 of 127
Striking up a conversation and winning her over with your charm and wit is much better because even goofy awkward attempts at charm are more appealing than someone cocky enough to think you'd give him your number with a single "Hey, how's it going" or some shitty variation of. Because yes, it is insanely bizarre and really has a 0% chance of success no matter what you look like. And that awkward pause between the asking and the rejecting is not the girl considering your gracious offer, but thinking how the fuck is she going to get away from you.

I've got to ask (not claiming you've done this before) but what is the catalyst for a man to approach a woman. Is it because she looks easy? You actually think you have a chance? She's so overwhelmingly attractive that you just got to ask? Because please don't tell me you men think it's actually going to work.

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SMX
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 09:18 AM #8 of 127
Originally Posted by kat
Because please don't tell me you men think it's actually going to work.
Yes it can.

If the guy is good at it, which most guys aren’t, he will make it appear natural and spontaneous, even though its not. Females get turned off when they think the approach is premeditated because they associate this with objectification. The key is to not let the female know, in any manner, that it's indeed premeditated. As a male, you can avoid this by making the approach appear as though it happened naturally. One of the best ways too do this is to somehow work in some event that just happened in the environment into your approach and strike mostly non-sex related small talk from there. If the small talk goes well, you comment on (note that I said comment and not “ask” this is important) continuing the conversation. Most people are generally followers by nature. Assuming that the guy can even get this far at this point, even if the female is skeptical about the guy, she probably still will follow the lead and give her number to the guy. This isn't to say he'll ever get anywhere further than this. But, pulling numbers isn't that hard, even for average looking men.

Oh and the catalyst for approaching a women, in this manner at least, is based on how pyshically attracted you are to her. Logical, assuming that you can't really know anything else about a stranger besides what they look like.

And, to the thread maker, you wouldn't happen to be asking this because you're concerned about whether or not you'll irritate some females if you approached them somehow are you? If so, trust me on this, just don't care about whether or not they get irritated. That might sound cold to some. But if a girl is so stuck on herself that she considers someone just trying to talk to her to be below her, she probably deserves to be irritated.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?
Tama8-chan
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 11:12 AM Local time: Mar 6, 2006, 03:12 AM #9 of 127
So there's the whole thing about a guy trying to get a girl's number.

But what about a girl trying to get a guy's number?
Same random situtations.

This is gonna be a false situation, but I saw it in an ad.
It's an ad for women's deoderant, but jus bear with me lol.

This chick sees a guy on a phone and is immediately attracted to him.
Guy is occupied but notices her too.
She ducks into the nearby passport photo booth, and takes some photos, then walks out, without taking them.
The guy grabs the photos, and sees that the girl took pics of the hand actions telling him to ring her, followed by her number written on her hand.

Guy realises this, hangs up on friend, and rings the girl.
Ad ends, and we are all to assume that they are going to meet up later.

The name of the deoderant? Impulse.
The point of the ad? Be Impulsive.


So girls. Ever done this sort of thing?

Better yet...ever had a deoderant that made you act differently? XD

How ya doing, buddy?
ava lilly
not a lily


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 11:36 AM #10 of 127
I don't think it matters if the guy looks like Brad Pitt or that gangly kid Brad you used to go to highschool with. if anybody I don't know just comes up to me and asks for my number, I'm not going to give it to them. there are the obvious reasons of who the hell are you, but more so the fact that they can't be asking for any reason other than purely shallow ones because they don't know anything about you either.

the whole action just makes everything so awkward. I don't enjoy being mean to people, so I generally just try to say no and get rid of them in the nicest way possible.

an even more awkward situation is when someone you actually know, from say school or work, who you really don't want to give your number to asks. ;_;

thankfully, none of the above happens very often.

There's nowhere I can't reach.
handzxxd0wn
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 01:55 PM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 11:55 AM #11 of 127
Originally Posted by ava lilly
an even more awkward situation is when someone you actually know, from say school or work, who you really don't want to give your number to asks. ;_;
I agree whole-heartedly. When it's personal, it tends to be more awkward. Not that I think it's a good thing if you ask for the number of a complete stranger. That's not only shallow and selfish, it's naive. For all you know, they might be already taken or, worst-case scenario, married.
They might also just think you're a creep, which is most likely true if you would go so low as to do something like ask someone out whom you haven't even had a single conversation with.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Smoodle
The real NanaMan


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:21 PM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 01:21 PM #12 of 127
Originally Posted by kat
I've got to ask (not claiming you've done this before) but what is the catalyst for a man to approach a woman. Is it because she looks easy? You actually think you have a chance? She's so overwhelmingly attractive that you just got to ask? Because please don't tell me you men think it's actually going to work.
Easy? No (not in my case, anyway). I'd say it would be because of physical attraction. It's not like the guy's asking for sex ... only a phone number or a date.

Double Post:
Originally Posted by SMX
And, to the thread maker, you wouldn't happen to be asking this because you're concerned about whether or not you'll irritate some females if you approached them somehow are you? If so, trust me on this, just don't care about whether or not they get irritated. That might sound cold to some. But if a girl is so stuck on herself that she considers someone just trying to talk to her to be below her, she probably deserves to be irritated.
Actually, I'm just wondering what goes on in girls' minds when things like this happen. I know if a cute girl asked me for my phone number, and she seemed nice enough, I'd be flattered as hell!

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Last edited by Smoodle; Mar 5, 2006 at 03:25 PM. Reason: Automerged double post.
Alice
For Great Justice!


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:31 PM #13 of 127
On the rare occasion that a guy has had the absolute cojones to just walk up to me and ask me for my phone number, I can tell you it has never worked out well for that poor guy.

If you're going to just walk up to a girl and ask her for her phone number, you might as well just walk right up, stick out your hand and say, "Hello. I'm a shallow motherfucker who makes a habit of asking girls out just because I think they're hot. Nothing you say at this point will make me like you any more or less. In fact, I don't give a crap about you or your personality. You're just hot."

I was speaking idiomatically.
Alice
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:33 PM #14 of 127
Don't misunderstand me. I wouldn't want anything to do with a guy who didn't think I was beautiful. But just walking right up to a girl and asking for her phone number SOLELY because of how she looks is just creepy as hell.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
NYRSkate
Happy Hour in Hell's Sports Bar


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:34 PM #15 of 127
Originally Posted by Devo
Fuck women seriously.
I claim movie and book rights.

FELIPE NO
Smoodle
The real NanaMan


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:41 PM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 01:41 PM #16 of 127
^ Isn't the point of a phone number so you can talk and get to know the person? Alice N Wonderland just makes it easier on the guy, actually. Guys really hate obnoxiously self-important girls, so what's the point in getting to know them?

How ya doing, buddy?
Plarom
 
I'm too busy being delicious.


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:42 PM #17 of 127
Originally Posted by Devo
Which is SO hypocritical on our part since we spend how much time so they actually DO find us attractive? Then when they happen to comment and recognize it we're like "eww creep."
Yea.. What the fuck is that about? On the couple occasions I have went up to a girl I didn't know and asked her for her number, 30% of the time she'd fork over the digits and not call while 70% of the time she'd laugh and walk away. I always thought doing that atleast showed you had enough self-confidence to handle yourself, let alone a potential mate. However, as soon as someone unknown approaches a girl, they're all "OMG STALKER!!!!".

What's up with that? :eyebrow:

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Alice
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:42 PM #18 of 127
Here's what I want. I want a guy who spends five minutes talking to me and says to himself, "Hey, this girl is interesting." Or smart. Or funny. Whatever.

If the reason he found out that I was any of those things was because he only talked to me in the first place because he thinks I'm hot, I wouldn't be offended (although ideally he would keep that info to himself). But I'm sick to death of guys who don't give a crap about anything these silly bitches have to say, as long as they have long blonde hair, big tits and weigh under 120 pounds.

Where you ever got the idea that I don't want to be seen as beautiful, I have no idea. But I get extremely offended by men who don't care about me, what I like and dislike, what I think about things, or about anything I have to say. I can tell you with 100% certainty that no one would EVER get anywhere with me if all they cared about was my looks. Women don't stay young and beautiful forever, and men who only care about things like that aren't worth anyone's time.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Last edited by Alice; Mar 5, 2006 at 03:44 PM.
Alice
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:45 PM #19 of 127
99% of of the time I wear jeans and a t-shirt, so he'll need to ask someone else.

How ya doing, buddy?
Smoodle
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:47 PM Local time: Mar 5, 2006, 01:47 PM #20 of 127
Ewwww, she thinks she can judge a man's personality within the 2 seconds it takes for him to muster up the courage and ask for her number! What a creep!!!

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?
NYRSkate
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:49 PM #21 of 127
Originally Posted by Devo
Then why spend any extra time grooming yourself?
Probably because she doesn't want her entire torso to be consumed by pubic hair by the time she turns 40.

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Alice
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:50 PM #22 of 127
Originally Posted by Smoodle
Ewwww, she thinks she can judge a man's personality within the 2 seconds it takes for him to muster up the courage and ask for her number! What a creep!!!
You can't judge anyone's personality within 2 seconds, so what kind of dipshit guy would think he could see a girl from across a room and know that she's worth asking out JUST BECAUSE SHE'S HOT. That's my whole point. It's ridiculous. Don't ask for a girl's number unless you've at least had a conversation with her.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Benjamin please
how's it going


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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:50 PM #23 of 127
Yeah, Alice, you're making yourself out to be quite a prude. =/
Courting a specific audience, then bitching about it is what I've gathered. If you don't want a guy to hit on you, then why bother even looking presentable when you go out? Why even keep up appearances if you dislike people's responses?

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Benjamin please
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:53 PM #24 of 127
Quote:
You can't judge anyone's personality within 2 seconds, so what kind of dipshit guy would think he could see a girl from across a room and know that she's worth asking out JUST BECAUSE SHE'S HOT.
What the hell are you so afraid of?
They're not actually judging in most cases, but instead are inclined to take a chance in meeting you and or asking you out. Remove the stick from your vagina please.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?
<a_lurker|laptop> I think your car died too.
Alice
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Old Mar 5, 2006, 03:53 PM #25 of 127
Devo, you seem to have missed the part where I said that I DEFINITELY want my man to think I'm beautiful. I just don't want that to be the deciding factor. Every single time a guy has just walked right up to me without knowing the first thing about me and asked me out, my creep alarm has gone off.

HOWEVER, if I know a guy is interested in me because of me - not because he think's I'm bangable, then of course I want him to think I'm beautiful.

I like to look pretty, but NOT so that creepy guys will just prance up to me and ask me for my phone number.

Jam it back in, in the dark.
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