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e-Buddies
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Lady Miyomi
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Old Mar 8, 2006, 10:50 PM #1 of 15
e-Buddies

I'm wondering what other people's thoughts are on this subject.

1) Do you put them on the same level as IRL friends?
2) Do you allow them the same benefits as IRL friends?

or

3) Do you keep them at arms' length because you don't know them?
4) Do you think the whole idea is a joke?

Jam it back in, in the dark.
Lee-chan
~キラキラ・マジック~


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Old Mar 8, 2006, 11:11 PM #2 of 15
Depends. I've had quite a few confidiants over the 'net. I've actually met a few in real life... one was a guy I knew in school (of course I didn't know this at the time); we got really close and now are practically best friends. Then I almost ended up going out with another guy I met on some forums and lived the next town over (something I found out later in the relationship).

But those cases are from when I was young and stupid. Or maybe I've just gotten really cynical since then. The only people I really talk to online are people I do know in real life, people I know from my blogging site, and people from communities like this. Most of the time I simply "kill time" and joke around with 'em. I usually don't hold them on the same level as IRL friends, and cutting out time for them for things like hours-long conversations and support sessions is something I generally don't do any more.

There's nowhere I can't reach.
Watts
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Old Mar 8, 2006, 11:25 PM Local time: Mar 8, 2006, 09:25 PM #3 of 15
Originally Posted by Lady Miyomi
I'm wondering what other people's thoughts are on this subject.

1) Do you put them on the same level as IRL friends?
Sure, because a lot of them are friends I made in real life. They just live in different countries, or I've sinced moved away from them.

Beats racking up a huge phone bill to Western Europe. Unless it's business.

Originally Posted by Lady Miyomi
2) Do you allow them the same benefits as IRL friends?
Uhh... I don't think I want to know what 'same benefits' means.

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Lady Miyomi
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 12:05 AM #4 of 15
Meaning, do you treat them the same way you treat your IRL friends.

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XerxesTheMighty
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 12:28 AM Local time: Mar 8, 2006, 10:28 PM #5 of 15
Oh hell yeah. I have online buddies from all over the world that've I've known for, oh man, must be like 4 or 5 years now. Some of them are almost like family. Actually last summer 5 us all met up and took a road trip across the upper US; from Seattle to Cedar Point Ohio to ride roller coasters and just hang out. Some of the ones I haven't met face to face probably know me better then some of my family do. So in short, yeah I treat online buds the same as I do for IRL buds.

I was speaking idiomatically.


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Smoodle
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 01:08 AM Local time: Mar 8, 2006, 11:08 PM #6 of 15
Weird. I don't think I've made one really good online friend out of all the many, many years I've been online now.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?
Watts
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 01:24 AM Local time: Mar 8, 2006, 11:24 PM #7 of 15
Originally Posted by Lady Miyomi
Meaning, do you treat them the same way you treat your IRL friends.
Ahh okay. Well then yes of course. I don't see any reason why I should be any different online then in real life. Therfore any sort of friendships should not be different. It's kind of like having a pen pal. Only you don't have to waste paper or pay for postage. Plus, it can be more frequent and less time consuming.

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elwe
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 02:47 AM Local time: Mar 9, 2006, 02:47 AM #8 of 15
1. I guess it depends on how well I know my "e-buddy." I tend to pay more attention to my real-life friends, but that's probably because I'm closer to them.

2. Sure Actually, I'm more open to online friends for some strange reason. There are countless things that I'd tell an online friend that I would never tell people I know in real life. It doesn't work the other way around, which really puzzles people I know.

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eriol33
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 03:15 AM Local time: Mar 9, 2006, 03:15 PM #9 of 15
That works for me too, I enjoy making eFriends. Though maybe it will be not so close as the IRL friends. But of course I consider them good friends. But chance to meet them maybe less than 1%.

Jam it back in, in the dark.
Bobbet
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 11:49 AM Local time: Mar 9, 2006, 10:49 AM #10 of 15
I have some close e-buddies that I've known for years. Some I've met already, and some I plan to meet later. I usually don't trust an e-buddy as much as some IRL friends, unless I've known them for years.

There's nowhere I can't reach.
xuemin
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 04:47 PM Local time: Mar 9, 2006, 09:47 PM #11 of 15
sad as it is, i think my 'e-buddies' greatly outnumber my RL friends, but they have different benefits, i'm more likely to confide in e-buddies since i know that they don't know my RL personality and are unlikely to be able to tell on me ^^; only one former online friend who is know a real life friend is able to tell the differences in my mood from my messages/actions because he's seen both sides of my personality (online and real life).

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
Blanka
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 06:18 PM Local time: Mar 9, 2006, 07:18 PM #12 of 15
I have a few (about..3) e-buddies that I would consider 'friends.' And yes, I do treat them the same way. I think I feel more comfortable with e-buddies then I do with "real" (if that's the word to use..?) friends.

I'm a quiet person, so when I'm online I tend to 'talk' more then I usually would. I also think you get to know the real person (if they're trying to show you their real side) a lot better, then you would if you had to talk to them face to face.. aaaye.. *shrugs*

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Soluzar
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 06:37 PM Local time: Mar 10, 2006, 12:37 AM #13 of 15
Originally Posted by Lady Miyomi
I'm wondering what other people's thoughts are on this subject.

1) Do you put them on the same level as IRL friends?
2) Do you allow them the same benefits as IRL friends?

or

3) Do you keep them at arms' length because you don't know them?
4) Do you think the whole idea is a joke?
1) When I've known them for a long while, and depending on the person, yes.
2) I don't know what that means.

3) Nope. I'm not good at being distant with people. I give freely of myself. More so than I should, sometimes.
4) No, not really. I think it's not an easy thing though.

It's easier to be "friends" over the internet than in real life, so therefore it is correspondingly harder to make a real connection with someone. It can happen though. The one thing that I do reject utterly as a joke and as a waste of time is online relationships. Until and unless you meet that person and spend time with them in the real world, it is not real. That is the voice of experience. Bitter, bitter experience.

I was speaking idiomatically.
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 07:07 PM Local time: Mar 10, 2006, 12:07 AM #14 of 15
I have several, who are arguably better to me than most people I have known in "real" life (not that that phrase even makes much sense). I treat them as what they are; real people who deserve as much respect as anyone else, regardless of how far away they are from me. I know them as well as any of my physically closer friends if not better.

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Plarom
 
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Old Mar 9, 2006, 07:31 PM #15 of 15
Originally Posted by Ulysses
I treat them as what they are; real people who deserve as much respect as anyone else, regardless of how far away they are from me. I know them as well as any of my physically closer friends if not better.
Same here! I consider IRL friendships and online friendships virtually the same, merely running along two parallels. They'll never intercept, but that's no reason for you to treat a person any different!

Sadly, the majority of my long-lasting 'e-buddies' have all gone their seperate ways and don't feel the same as I do. Maaany of the people I literally grew up with online have severed communications and largely disappeared from the scene, leaving me with my immature and unambitious IRL friends.

Actually, that was one of the reasons I joined GFF. After many years of having interesting and robust relationships online, in a matter of a year that was more or less demolished. I think friendships online have the potential to be just as rewarding than the real thing.

FELIPE NO

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