Parent-Child Moments

I've been thinking of my future a little bit. Through my future, I hope to someday have a son or daughter that takes some of the paths that I take. And through my wisdom and experience with my father, I hope to share that knowledge with them too.

What are your parent and child moments? They could be with your parent or with your child.

One distinct time with my father was when I was assigned detention for retaliating against an upper classman who was seriously bugging me. What happened is I was on the bus at the end of the day. We had to share busses the high school kids too. Well there was this one particular prick behind me that I just couldn't stand. When I sat down, he started flicking my ear! I withstood it for a little while, I asked him to stop multiple times (Every time I said please). He still continued. Well I snapped an I reached behind and hit him in the arm 10 times as hard as I could. After I sat back down, he punched me hard in the arm once and stopped. Unfortunately the bus driver saw it and brought us back to school. I had a talk with the principal and I had to do one detention (He understood that it was in self defense but he still had to do something. the other kid got a weeks worth I think). I wasn't worried about the detention. What I was worried about was my father. Seeing as how I was stuck at school, my father had to come pick me up. All the way home I was terrified, in fact I was crying a little bit (this was back in 6th mind you). While on the way home, he asked me for all the details, he also sounded normal, but I still thought he was pissed. When we got hom we both sat down on the couch, and he told me simply "You did this in self-defense son. I'm not going to ground you or anything. You actually made me proud." To me these were words from heaven. I was happy and I trusted my father much more later. In fact it made me lie very minimally.

How ya doing, buddy?

While it's not quite a specifically shining single moment, reading made me reflect on how my dad always seemed to conveniently blame things on the situation rather than faults of my own. I recall how he almosts always sides with me on things.

eg. "Oh you got sick because their house is so dusty! They don't clean it."
eg2. "We chose valedictorians based on grades instead of popularity back when I was in school."
eg3. "I saw you explaining for a long time to that parent. (I teach piano) It's hard to explain to asians because they don't understand it very well" (the situation was completely different but he just assumed)

etc.

Makes me smile.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I was more close to my dad, I was daddy's girl.
The most memorable time I had with him was when he taught me how to ride my bike.

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My son Albel was just born so there really hasn't been a moment that outshines anything else he does. But because he was just born(he'll be a month old tomorrow)everything he does is a great moment.

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The moments that either my mom or my father look at me and tell me "you got fat" or "you look like shit" or "those bags under your eyes have gotten darker," and I know they really mean "you under a lot of stress lately?" "are you ok?" and "have you been getting enough sleep?"

The words my parents choose are straight to the point and painfully blunt (seemingly unnecissarily in some people's eyes), but the moments I can respond back to such comments with, "I'm ok, thanks" seem like the "understanding" moments between me and my parents.

I was speaking idiomatically.

"You clean the house better then your sister... now clean under my bed." - Mother

o.o

That one will stick with me for a very long time

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Hmmmm....there are many memories between me and my father, but only one that I consider a defining point.

When I was a teenager, me and my father got into a huge fight. The battle raged from room to room until we found ourselves in the backyard. During our time outside, I finally managed to get the upper-hand and locked him in a crane choke hold. During that brief moment, we locked eyes and he squeezed out a sentence with a pale face, "Why are you doing this?"

That simple question shattered my world, and from then on, my respect and honor for him has grown exponentially. To this date, he's never referred to as my step dad, but Father.

FELIPE NO

There is only one moment I can think of; I've never been close to my parents, but there was this one particular time with my father. A long time ago a girl in my high school really pushed me over the brink and I punched her in the face. I felt guilty about it, mostly because I'm not a violent person and I shocked myself by doing it, but also because I kept picturing what my parents would say when they found out. However, when I explained the situation to my father, he just said, "If I'd been in your situation, I'd have taken her round the back of the bike sheds and beaten ten kinds of shit out of her." (just a little note; my dad is by no means all for hitting woman, he's quite a gentle man).

Just knowing that I wasn't hated for expressing my anger in such a violent way was a relief, but that he was on my side just sticks with me.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

My mom has been feeling really stressed about where her life was headed and her job and she decided to do something for herself. I wasn't living with her at the time and was having trouble getting enough money to feed me and my dog. Imagine my surprise when she decided to spend her savings on a ... hot tub. I let her know everyday that I gave up eating so that I could buy dog food and she just giggled and told me about the time she almost drowned because she was drinking wine coolers in the water.

When I came home for christmas, we sat down and had a long heart to heart and finally she took my hand and said "daughter, lets go outside and talk about this in the hot tub." With tears in my eyes, finally realizing what this meant to her, I put on my knitted bikini and headed outside. She pulled back the cover and tried putting her foot inside only to discover... the hot tub was frozen solid.

I looked in her eyes and said "What the fuck did you think was going to happen getting a fucking hot tub in fucking massachusetts you daft cunt?" and I slept awesome that night because I was proved right.

Yeah that moment was pretty touching

How ya doing, buddy?

*heart is warmed*

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Senorita Preved

I looked in her eyes and said "What the fuck did you think was going to happen getting a fucking hot tub in fucking massachusetts you daft cunt?" and I slept awesome that night because I was proved right.

We manage to keep ours hot year round somehow.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Well, my father is an alcoholic and he and my mother split up when I was like 2 or 3, and so I never really get to spend much time with him. But the most memorable moment i have with him is this one camping trip I went on with him. He took me on this big hike through the woods, and we spent hours searching for something. He wouldn't tell me what it was, and I was like 4, so I was getting cranky and tired. Finally we found what he was looking for, a tree where the upper branches had thinned out, and what remained was some dead branch that formed to look like the number 4. He spent all this time looking for it because he figured I would be thrilled by a tree that formed my age. I can't remember what my reaction was, but thinking back to it, I think that search is what instilled within me a large appreciation for the little details in everything. To this day, I find myself seeing those little details about everything. Whether it be a peculiar rock formation, or simply an interesting way that a peice of paper has stuck against the side of a building in the wind. I can always find a reason to look at it. And it carries forth into my dealings with people. Even if I completely despise someone for the majority of things they do, I can always pick out the little things that make it easier for me to get along with them. Needless to say, my father at his present state, can't remember ever going for that walk. But that is a memory that I will always have.

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Originally Posted by Sassafrass

We manage to keep ours hot year round somehow.

Where do you go ice skating? It just seems impractical

I was speaking idiomatically.

Hm, I guess I tend to remember all the bad stuff and not much of the good stuff. I remember my friends in grade school liking my mom more than me because she was so "wild" and "fun". I remember her slapping me in Disney World and beating me on the boardwalk at Seaside Heights. Funny that we are much closer now that we don't live together.

I hope that when my kids are older and posting on GFF with the new generation that they post good memories. ^^

How ya doing, buddy?

Again, this is one of those threads that I thought it would be grounded or it wouldn't come up so many times. However this time I'm glad about this choice in Threads.

FELIPE NO

I don't have any pleasant memories of either of my parents. They weren't abusive. Maybe borderline neglectful, but never anything worse than two very fucked-up egotists. I've never been particularly close to them. They've never imparted any significantly enlightening bits of knowledge to me (unless I count my father's constant dirge of "hey here's a tip" moments).

Anything that does approximate to a happy reminiscence certainly does not have a happy outcome.

Immediately after dad walked out, my mother decided she'd never done anything wrong in her entire life and made no effort to repair the shoddy relationship we had. My father occasionally poked his head into my life to try and cheer me up (i.e., try and make other people think he was trying to atone for what he'd done wrong despite being constantly selfrighteous about every decision he'd made).

I remember a particular day when he still visited the UK - He appeared at my dorm, took me to a shopping centre for the day, bought me three CDs, and a DVD, and even a pair of Gamecube games. And a shirt. And lunch. And he took me to see a film.

So, I was having the time of my life. This was my birthday treat. This was one of the only birthday treats I've ever experienced - My mother decided I was "too old" for parties at age eight and promptly cut me off from everything of the kind. This day was a blessing. Absolutely perfect. I'd never had as much fun with my father in my entire life.

Obviously, something had to be up.

We sat down for lunch. We ordered drinks, and he threw together some lame context-setter he'd obviously been preparing the entire day about "supporting all of his children" or something similar. I couldn't really say anything to that other than nod my head and keep listening to whatever it was he had to say. "Yeah I get it you're going to do your best to be a part of our lives."

Wrong. He then used the opportunity to tell me his girlfriend of the past decade (yes, during a decent proportion of his marriage) had given birth to his twin children. Prematurely. A boy and a girl. The girl is hydrocephalic and probably mentally retarded to some extent. The boy's growth will likely be stunted and he will never be taller than 4'.

He told me this on my fourteenth birthday. I'll never forgive him for any of his bullshit.

I don't want children. Ever. I'm ashamed to say I take after the man far more than I should.

How ya doing, buddy?

I've had so many beautiful parent-child moments with my own kids that I wouldn't even know where to start, but something happened the other night that makes me smile when I think about it now, although it's one of those times when you don't realize you've had a "moment" until you think back on it later.

I had taken a shower and when I came out Wyatt was asleep in my bed. I decided to let him stay there and climbed in next to him. I soon realized that he was in the middle of a bad dream. I laid there for a minute and wondered whether I should wake him up or not, and then I had another idea. I put my arm around him and whispered into his ear, "It's over now. Let's go get some chocolate ice cream with sprinkles." He immediately calmed down (apparently having incorporated my words into his dream). A few seconds later his lips started moving as if he was eating.

Dream altering. Now that's love. =)

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Krelian

I don't want children. Ever. I'm ashamed to say I take after the man far more than I should.

Yeah but you take after your mother too right? I mean I take after my father and he has a tendancy to do nothing but work work work, but I'm more relaxed and I typically read a book rather than work on an aquarium. So you might have more of your mother in you than you think. I don't think that you are all your father.

Originally Posted by Alice

I had taken a shower and when I came out Wyatt was asleep in my bed. I decided to let him stay there and climbed in next to him. I soon realized that he was in the middle of a bad dream. I laid there for a minute and wondered whether I should wake him up or not, and then I had another idea. I put my arm around him and whispered into his ear, "It's over now. Let's go get some chocolate ice cream with sprinkles." He immediately calmed down (apparently having incorporated my words into his dream). A few seconds later his lips started moving as if he was eating.

Dream altering. Now that's love. =)

I wonder how many times my parents have altered my dreams when I was alot younger. I seemed to talk in my sleep alot when I was 5 - 15.

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