[General Discussion] Dumb, dumb, dumb.

Phoenix Wright 2, at the very end where you have to pick out one piece of evidence to show to one person. Essentially, two guesses you have to get right both at once. I bungled it the first time, reset, and then (unknowingly) figured out what you're supposed to do on my own.

The thing is, when you get the correct solution, the next few lines of dialogue that follow are exactly the same as when you screw up. This is unlike the rest of the game when you know right away that you blew it. I think they did that on purpose to foil you if you try the classic adventure game tactic of throwing your entire inventory at the game with save/reload, but that was a nasty place to do it. I spent two days playing with combinations, not realizing that I'd gotten the right solution early on and reset before it actually told me I was right.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by WraithTwo

Oh man, I can top you all. When I was around 10, I rented my first RPG, Super Mario RPG.

I couldn't get out of Mario's Pad, because I didn't realize that the little tab in the area leads to the next one.

I was just as bad (probably worse). It took me about at least half-hour, to figure out that that tab leads you to the world map but it took me a few days to figure out that at the world map you could actually move down (which progresses the storyline) instead of just up (back to where you had alreaedy been). Stupid me.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by Tidsu

how about this one when i was 10 none of my family (inc. me ) couldn't beat Jenova after Aeris got stabbed.. but now 6 years later i kicked the living shit out of that Jenova and got my revenge

Current party when facing Jenova

26 Cloud
26 Tifa
27 Barret

This...this post fills me with an empty mourning for society's doomed future like nothing else could. First, you lost to Jenova, which is embarassing enough. Laboratory monkeys beat Jenova in their first attempt; your inability to do so puts you on an evolutionary scale somewhere around "ringworm".

But okay, so you lost to Jenova. Fine. Now, are you telling me that you brooded over this defeat for six fucking years? Day in, day out, this nibbled away at your soul until you could endure the shame no longer and had to show that fucking Jenova just who's the boss around here? Six years is a pretty sad grudge to carry against a video game. I suppose if you'd had any friends during that period, they'd have mentioned this to you.

Also, for the record, nobody gives a flying fuck what party you used to defeat Jenova, or anything in FFVII. The game is over a decade old. It's not news anymore. The challenge has long since faded. Nobody here is pacing back and forth, stroking their chin and saying to himself "I just can't get past Jenova! If only someone would come along and tell me what divinely inspired combination of characters allowed them to narrowly squeak past this seemingly insurmountable foe. Then - oh, then! - that person would be a true hero and we would surely praise his name forever and ever!"

I guess we should be impressed at your persistence. It's not every day we're visited upon by someone with such intense tunnel vision as you. Six long, excruciating years of deep thought and meditation were all it took for you to overcome a simple mid-boss in a video game. That must've been the proudest day your parents ever experienced, second only to the day you turned 14 and stopped using diapers. So good job! You've struggled long and hard to attain the sort of mediocrity the rest of us associate with the average 7-11 employee.

(And, this is a "no shit" sort of comment: It's not exactly a grand revelation that you used Cloud, seeing as you had no choice in the matter. Including him is pretty fucking redundant, you cerebral midget.)

Upon the related matter of Final Fantasy, yes, we get the freakin' point. YOU LIKE FINAL FANTASY. Congratulations. You're one wool sweater away from being a complete sheep. Now knock it off.
Your name is atrocious. "Tidsu"? You've managed to combine the worst of two horrible demographics - Squaresoft fanatics and Japanophiles - into one tragic cry for help, an unholy amalgam of reprehensibility. The oversized man-love shrine to Tidus in your signature is just toxic icing on the festering cake that is your social ineptitude and lonely existence.
Your fanboyism serves as the classic example of why people have grown to dislike everything about the Final Fantasy series: it only leads to obsessive twits like you. You aren't a human being. You're just an empty husk with corporate logos plastered all over it. Put the controller down, go outside and soak up a little sun. It might sting at first, but that pain is only your body remembering how to process Vitamin D. (It's not found in Doritos and Mountain Dew!) Talk to people, see what they're like. Bathe before you attempt this. Make a wish upon a star. Become a real boy!

And give up this "OMGFINALFANTASY UNF UNF UNF" bullshit. We seriously don't wanna deal with mindless fanboyisms.

Most amazing jew boots

.....Post of the Decade, confirmed. Mod of the Millenium, confirmed. Holy shitfuck, that's the greatest rant I've ever read. You win at least a baker's dozen internets.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Crash Landon

This...this post fills me with an empty mourning for society's doomed future like nothing else could.

And your post does that to me even more.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by PsychoJosh

And your post does that to me even more.

Well, aren't you the spunky, little upstart?

If the best you could do to attempt injuring me was twisting my own words back in the most uninspired, "NO U" manner possible, then you're just Saddy McSadderston, the Mayor of Sadtown, driving your sad car around the sad landscape, taking in all the sadness your existence has sadly generated.

Gonna have to work harder than that to leave a chink in my armor, pal. But I admire your courage.

Here is a cookie I decided not to finish eating. All yours, sport. You earned it!



FELIPE NO

Crash: In your former post, you said what everybody had in their mind, what everybody wanted to say. But no one will say anything now, since you just worded it so perfectly. Funny how the thread title and this user go together like chocolate and peanut butter (or any similar comparisons).

Awesome post. It's great to see Final Fantasy fanboyism put up against sheer logic and (the somewhat amusing) truth.

Anyway... I have a rather embarrassing one to add. It was in Final Fantasy VII (Oh you know I jest). I don't know how many times I get lost in games with mazes (i.e. dungeons). What am I saying; they're virtually the same thing. Nowadays when I come across a dungeon and come to a brick wall (literally), that's when I'll go and look at a guide of some sort.

There are also times where I've tried to progress in a game, but have no idea what to trigger for the storyline to progress. I would go all around the world in the game and then find out that all I had to do was talk to the person who was in front of me after the last major battle. Unfortunately, I can't supply any specifics, but you can see how dumb I am sometimes at video games.

Edit: Oh yeah, the first time I played Suikoden (I), I thought that there was no way to change character's equipment, even though the option to change equipment is there in the menu. During another playthrough I realised it was there, and I think I hung my head in shame.

It was sort of a self-imposed challenge, too. ^_^

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Awesome post, Crash. XD

But speaking of triggers in games, Hotel Dusk was another one for me...

It was that point in the story when you had the retrieve the box from the office, but the only way to trigger the next part of the story was to look at EVERYTHING in the room. At the time, I didn't really think about that, I was stuck trying to figure out what to do for the next hour or so.

But before that, I spent an hour trying to get the crowbar to stay in place. That took forever also.

How ya doing, buddy?

Didn't know you could run from battles in my early RPGs. Nowadays, running makes up >50% of my game lol! More later when I remember.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I'm sure shmup fans can relate to this one...In every side-scrolling shmup, you should waste an early life to see if you can die by hitting the terrain or not. For some odd reason, I always forget to do this...EXCEPT once I'm fully powered up and have the entire screen filled with crap and I'm stuck thinking "Gee, I wonder if I die if I hit the terrain or not". Then I die anyway in the split second of indecisiveness.

I'm playing Atelier Iris 1 now and I've had a sidequest activated for the last 10game hours...Apparently, I'm supposed to be killing a bird north of some town. I'm afraid to FAQ the answer because I know it's right in front of me, so I'm just advancing the storyline and hoping the game ends before I realize the answer is probably right in front of my face.

Once I was playing Phantasy Star II and the spells are not named well at all in this game. After about 2 hours of trolling through the first main dungeon, I was right at the end, so naturally I wanted to cast the game's 'heal' spell a couple times. Turns out I cast whatever the hell the game's 'exit' spell was...FUCK! Haven't touched the game since...

And I sympathize with whoever said Megaman Legends before...Fine game, but it doesn't always explain things as clearly as it should.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by evilboris

It didnt happen with me but I bet that someone will mention the Barrel from Sonic 3 Carnival level. You know, the one where you couldnt figure out that you need to press up and down.

Yaargh! I forgot all about this one till you mentioned it. Spent so friggin long trying to get Sonic through that damn barrel. I usually had Tails along so I'd take controller two and fly up with Sonic and drop him to make the barrel go down. Then there would be the endless jumping. And Tails would magically go through while I was still on top. I think I got through accidentally . . . Don't remember how I got through . . .A lot of cursing with this one . . .

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

When I first played Descent, it took me about a month to figure out how to move forward. My excuse is that I was eight-years-old and didn't know what the word "accelerate" meant.

I was speaking idiomatically.

First off... Crash, win. Pure, epic win.

Second off... In the first dungeon in Zelda: OoT, I somehow managed to get stuck in the basement's first room. There was this strange white stuff blocking the only door out... finally, frustrated, I asked my dad for help.

In the span of 5 minutes, he, having never played a game remotely like this before in his entire life, figured out that you can burn the stuff. Epic fail.

In my defense though, I was 11 at the time... ;_;

How ya doing, buddy?

I'd have to say on Tomb Raider Chronicles,I was trying to line up a jump to a rope on the Black Isle. I kept missing it,falling, and right before Lara would hit the ground and break I would go to the menu and press load game so it would start me back at the top of the cliff. And I would try to jump to the rope all over again. Well I kept missing and about the 10th time of missing it,as she was falling,I went to the menu screen as usual but instead of hitting load I accidently hit save. So Yeah. Everytime I would load that game all I would hear is her scream and then hit the ground. It made me so mad.

And then playing FFIX my first time through,when I got to Memoria I didn't realize the glowing orbs were save points so I went through almost all of it until I decided to walk up to one and realized it was a save point. If I would of realized that earlier,it would of saved me holding my breath through all the boss fights. ;p

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by Tuigi

Metal Gear Solid.
''look behind the package for her code''....my first play whit metal gear solid was a rental...stupid fucks.

Aye, I had that as well. I got past that the hard way, just trying out EVERY codec frequency until you got the right one. =/

Hmm...as usuall my mind fails me when I need it. I can't think of anything specific that makes me cry when I look back now. I hate when that happens...I know I did stuff that makes all other posts to shame.

Only thing that comes to mind is me starting a new Lufia 2 game, and I saved over my uber savegame that had EVERYTHING, including all the blue treasures. =/

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Tomb Raider 1 on the abortion boss, actually fuck that more like every Tomb Raider game! How many times have you loaded up a previously saved game only to lose your footing barely 10 seconds after starting...

*scream*



*scream*



*scream*



*scream*


You get the idea... one of the first things you learn about Fight Club Tomb Raider is never save the game near a deep hole unless you have no choice. Oh and there was when I figured out how to do a swimming dive by pure accident... good times...

Jam it back in, in the dark.