[Multiplatform] Bionic Commando - There's no way through, you're just gonna have to fuck it.

Originally Posted by GB

Okay, I just had a weird dialogue thing happen to me, too. Fought the giant worm robot thing right now and died. Ordinarily the beginning dialogue is:

Joe: "Spencer, there's no way out. You're going to have to fight it."
Spencer: "My pleasure."

Instead, I got this on my second try:

"Spencer, there's no way out. You're going to have to fuck it."

"Um..."

Yea, a lot of the dialog changes if you die and have to do scenes over. Some of them sound like outtakes though but it's all good. One of the later bosses pretty much gives you a whole speech and if you're on hard and have to redo it, Spencer tells him to shut the fuck up

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by GB

"Spencer, there's no way out. You're going to have to fuck it."

"Um..."

And I thought I was hearing things, since the subtitles were on and they didn't reflect this change in dialogue.

The thing Toku mentions is just the skip function though, and not any altered dialogue on retry, so it's not the same thing.

Most amazing jew boots

Ok, I'm incapable of figuring things out.

The fireball throwing biomechs have a weakness. You can shoot the fireball as they're charging it and it'll blow up and cause them to hang in the air for a moment. It's not quite intuitive when you're trying to figure this out, and I did accidentally just now on my Commando run, but maybe it'll help someone to have this info ahead of time.

SO MANY WASTED GRENADES.

-----

Edit:

Yeah, after figuring out the weakness to the fireball assholes, the later parts of Commando went relatively easily. The boss on the crab near the end can instant kill you if he hits you with anything, so that was a little tricky, but otherwise not too bad. I was anticipating it being a lot worse, but once you learn that you have to play more conservative (less whip usage, more DFA, for example) and lots and lots of kite tosses for the heavies, you'll adjust pretty quick. Forces you to really get that swing down to second nature, especially versus snipers because they can fuck you up quick.

Damn intense though, that fight before the worm, with the music and the SHIT LOADS of guys, and the OH GOD I WILL DIE IN TWO SECONDS IF I FUCK UP.

Just make sure you have all three armour upgrades and it won't be that bad. =o

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Ok, to the three manly men who bought this shit because they have a functioning pair of testiclates, some awesome is going down.

Amazon.com: Bionic Commando: Original Game Soundtrack: Music

Yeehaw.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Colonel Skills

Ok, to the three manly men who bought this shit because they have a functioning pair of testiclates, some awesome is going down...

It is, by the way, available now as a collection of MP3s.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Simply put, if you don't buy at least "The Gauntlet," you are an individual who hates fun.

FELIPE NO

Just buy the damn disc, you boobs.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Honestly, Skills, that shit is just getting copied onto my computer anyway.

Spoiler:

Follow my or Skills' lead, people.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I could make a quality argument and go into "I'd buy FLACs" but it's an entirely superfluous argument considering we're both the cool dudes buying the shit here instead of everyone else sitting there and masturbating into a jar.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Im debating purchasing CD or the mp3. I'm being impatient and don't want to wait for the cd.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

You can't lose either way. The download is a couple bucks cheaper, while the disc is a nice physical, non-burned copy of the OST you can put up somewhere.

You're getting the ridiculously phenomenal soundtrack regardless, so there's no bad choice here.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Well, the game has finally been released properly. By that, I mean, the PC version is available and solves all of the problems that plagued the awful console versions.

Perhaps these issues bothered some folks less, but the terrible framerate and constant (lengthy) load screens destroy the original release. I simply couldn't deal with it. It really made the game feel like a chore.

The PC version, however, moves at a rock solid 60 fps and requires nothing more than 3-4 seconds to load (or reload) a level. Basically, the game is now fixed and the results are so much more fun.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Playing this game now for the first time and having a blast! Taking polycrafts down with your mighty boots is pure win.
Btw, what's behind the big door you encounter in the start of Fissure location? It says you need some purple matrix from BC: Rearmed (which was released a year ago!). Is there any way to cheat your way through?

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

No, there is no cheat to unlock it.

I've yet to get through it since it requires all Yashichis from Rearmed (something I've been meaning to do), but from what I can recall hearing, it's

Spoiler:

a room with various nods to the classic game.

They made it so that the more "interesting" bonuses (RAD skin, prototype weapon) are more easily obtained.

FELIPE NO

In true Amazon fashion, the disc is in stock, but they don't feel like actually shipping it for two weeks.

So I won't get it until the end of August. Or something.

Edit: Or maybe not. It's listed as in stock on the site, but apparently after contacting the department directly about this, they said that's an error. Maybe there was another delay of some kind.

Most amazing jew boots

So I finally got around to playing this, and I'm highly disturbed by what seems to be the ending.

Spoiler:

Is that whole anticlimactic "fight" with Super Joe all there is or is there a "true ending" for beating it on Hard Mode? And what the hell happened to Grey Fox that sniper who meets up with you near the end?

Jam it back in, in the dark.

WolfDemon
There is only one ending.

Spoiler:

No idea about the sniper. Why the hell did he even appear? He doesn't seem to have any motives whatsoever.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I personally didn't think of him as the final boss, but more of a... resolution to the story? I thought it was minimalist-- a bit cheesy, perhaps, but ultimately satisfying.

For the Sniper, he's given a name (as I happened to look for the man who does his voice in the credits, and there it was). I mean, I can't remember it, but maybe there's your reason to play it again.

something about the ending:

According to some dude who could be totally reading into things and not basing anything on facts (I'm not sure of it myself, since I don't feel like doing a lot of research to find out), the Sniper was the one who sent the first Morse code message in the post-credits scene. That would definitely be a motive, and very much a hostile one.

And if you haven't done so yet, go and read the translation of the second Morse code message.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

The morse Code in the end:
-... . ... - .- . - .. --. . .-.-.- / .- ..- ... ..-. ..- . .... .-. ..- -. --. / ...- --- -. / .--. .... .- ... . / --.. .-- . .. / ...- --- .-. -... . .-. . .. - . - .-.-.- / .- -.- - .. ...- .. . .-. . / .--. .-. --- .--- . -.- - / .- .-.. -... .- - .-. --- ... ... .-.-.-

BESTAETIGE. AUSFUEHRUNG VON PHASE ZWEI VORBEREITET. AKTIVIERE PROJEKT ALBATROSS.

CONFIRMED. IMPLEMENTATION OF PHASE TWO. ACTIVATE PROJECT ALBATROSS.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I would spoiler tag that bitch.

But yes, there you go, guys.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I read the translation for the second message and it says something about

Spoiler:

Project Albatross. So maybe someone found the ruins of the Albatross and rebuilt it or something. Whatever. I liked this game a lot until Super Joe became the villain for no reason. Then the whole revelation that "LOL EMILY WAS USED TO MAKE YOUR ARM" with no explanation on how it happened. Fuck this game.

Oh, someone posted it.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Too bad with how poorly the game sold I doubt this is getting a sequel ANYTIME soon and if it does, I doubt it'll be anything like this. I know some of you will be happy about that but I'd definitely be ='(.

FELIPE NO