Drunken excursions

So the closest I've been to drunk is either spinning around in circles for five minutes, cooking shrimp scampi with white wine, or coming out of general anesthesia after getting my wisdom teeth pulled. I've heard good stories (like funny stories, not just stupid ones) from friends who've been drunk, and I was wondering what everyone's best stories are?

I think the best non-drunk acting-drunk story I've heard was my buddy who would get together with all his non-drinking friends, they'd pick what kind of drunk they would be out of a hat (happy drunk, flirty drunk, angry drunk, sleepy drunk, etc) and act that way for the night, all with the requisite bottle-in-a-paper-bag. They got all sorts of nasty looks from the local folk, and it was all just good clean fun. Funny how that works.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

You mean besides a tired drunk? =P I think that means I'd be either a playful drunk or a pissy drunk, because I've seen both aspects of personality blaze forth in glory upon severe sleep deprivation.

There's nowhere I can't reach.