A Confusing Situation

It's my honest opinion that when people say they want honesty, 99% of the time what they mean is they want a lie that seems like honesty. I've been hit pretty damn hard myself for that many times and while I continue to be horrifyingly honest with people it never lends itself to my advantage.

You also sound a lot like me, which would just be sad if that's the case. I was home-schooled from middle school and onward so the majority of my life was pretty much me struggling to make friends in awkward situations/places (because I wasn't even going to school...) and then ultimately one long miserable "lonely" phase where all I was doing was playing video games and of course... sitting on the PC.

Love to say it gets easier but it really hasn't for me. I'm still struggling to force myself outside and make friends but most of it seems like wasted effort at best, all the while knowing that if I just give up that things will never get better. I'm not the most social person, but I'm definitely trying. Nobody else is going to notice or care that you feel it's "harder" for yourself to do what they do, either, so there isn't really anything you can do but suck it up and keep trying until it goes better.

How ya doing, buddy?