[DnD] GW URBX: 20! EVERYONE IS EXPLODE

Name: KICKPUNCH "Happy Flower" CRUSHDICK

Race: Cyborg Dinosaur

Class: Samurai Cowboy

Weapons: Katanas, Submachine guns, LASER EYES. (Heavy Melee/Light Ranged)

Sponsors: Frank's Discount Decanters. GR?M WONDERFUL JUICES (from concentrate). Malboro BAD BREATH Cigarettes.

Looks like:



Reskin to come after you roll mutation.

Backstory: RAAAUAUGAHGAHGH was once enjoying a nice peaceful day. Chillin, maxin', relaxin' all cool. Eating some herbivores outside the school, when a couple of time portals, who were up to no good, started making trouble in his neighbourhood.

He got in one little time warp and his mom got scared, said you're going to the future to live in "Bull Err".

Arriving in the future in the year seven thousand or eight, he looked at the portal and "GALKJHAHAG-GATOR". He looked at his kingdom, he was finally there, to eat all the thrones as the prince of Bull Err.

...only problem being that "Bull Err" turned out to be a place where any Taurus who made a major mistake in life was sent to atone for their sins. Suddenly transported to ANGRY COW PRISON was not RAAAUAUGAHGAHGH's idea of a good time. Even though he ate over 30 cows that day, constantly getting gored in the chest was not a lot of fun.

Luckily he was saved by a wandering cigarette salesman. A cigarette salesman who introduced him to the wonderful world of smoking. Of course, Malboro cigarettes are not that good for you. One puff and RAAAUAUGAHGAHGH found himself silenced, confused, blinded, poisoned and turned into a little imp like creature.

To survive, he was partially REBUILT AS A ROBOT. And given a brain slightly larger than a walnut. (But only slightly).

He took the name KICKPUNCH CRUSHDICK, once he learned what crushing and dicks were. His allegiance to the cigarette company, who built him better, stronger, and faster than before, is why he's such an upstanding and loyal team member to this day.

How ya doing, buddy?

4 Dice Rolls *Non Primary 4

KICKPUNCH also has steel whiskers forged by the elves of Gondolin that glow blue in the presence of orcs and goblins.

He also likes to rub up against your leg and show you his anus.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

On that note, there's also:

Super
Heroes
In
Need of

Serious
Units of
Castles,
Krona, and
Strumpets

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

That one works too.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Or "The Grundles"

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Fluffykitten McGrundlepuss

I hope you didn't spend too long writing up my character sheet, Pang. Doesn't look like I'll be needing it much longer.

I don't know why anyone put any effort into this, with you around. It probably took him more time to make one of the five sheets than he's spent on the rest of the game.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I am a strong believer in our ability to roll ourselves into oblivion.

FELIPE NO

There isn't a square in that room that isn't adjacent to part of a spleen, a rib, or some mucus of some sort.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Pang, it's probably best if we resolve that log situation before Rychord acts, to put his options better in context.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by It's a Grundleful Life

Dumb question, where are you getting that extra 7 from your Inspiring Word?

Second Wind restores a healing surge value, which is 1/4 total HP?

I have no idea if Gamma World changes Second Wind mechanics, sorry.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

What is that south of the keg there?

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Man, three days of bench pressing that pool table has gotta take a little bit of a toll on a guy.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Wait did I seriously just get glued to the ground on a critical miss

I was speaking idiomatically.

It's also totally not your turn or even close to it yet!

SO RELAX

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

If you can hit a grid square, you can hit anything in the grid square, yes.

FELIPE NO

I left that one particularly visible because a) it doesn't matter and b) Rychord deserves public shaming

All the other ones are full of spoilers, don't worry

How ya doing, buddy?

I just figured your character might have been out of stameena or something

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I've really got to stop taking one huge 80%+ hit at the start of these things.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Oh, sorry about that. I completely thought I posted rolling the death save. That's on me. My bad.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Pretty sure that whole thing about not being able to fail death saves is on the character sheet, and all that.

The roll result or 10, no?

Also I think the turn order is slightly out of whack?

Lastly all the combined modifiers for the save pretty much give me instant +20 I THIIIIIIINK. Will confirm shortly.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Hold on Rychord.

I didn't even get to take my modified death save/roll thing, so there might be interjections.

I need to bug Pang on AIM when I see him again to see what the deal is.

Most amazing jew boots

that right there is some bullshit

Originally Posted by IRC

[06/02/13 - 15:19:15] <Colonel_Skills> don't fuck up?
[06/02/13 - 15:21:39] <Colonel_Skills> do it fast
[06/02/13 - 15:21:44] <Colonel_Skills> I want to resolve this before going
[06/02/13 - 15:22:00] <Diss> That one hits
[06/02/13 - 15:22:01] <Diss> Next UP
[06/02/13 - 15:22:29] <Diss> Got both
[06/02/13 - 15:23:01] <Colonel_Skills> well that was fortunate
[06/02/13 - 15:23:21] <Diss> All skill
[06/02/13 - 15:23:52] <Colonel_Skills> I can't believe that worked
[06/02/13 - 15:25:04] <Diss> It's 'cause I discovered the fabled EX LARIAT

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

So does the bomb have initiative 13 or something? Why does it go after your dudes but before mine?

I am fine with moving at the same time as the explosion actually. (It would also be ultra badass)

Or EXACTLY THE SAME TIME.

Yeah. This could actually be sweet.

FELIPE NO

So how do we determine the turn order between multiple 13s then?

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

OH hey sorry, been busy, will post tonight

Jam it back in, in the dark.