Books transformed into movies

Originally Posted by Krelian

The upcoming adaptation of Philip Pullman's "His Dark Materials" series, however, is going to fucking SUCK. They're removing all - ALL - references to religion, which means it's just going to be about a pair of kids running around with shapeshifting animals for a few hours. Gah.

His Dark Materials with no religious references? That's like...if the Harry Potter movies had decided to drop every reference to magic. His Dark Materials is ALL about religion. Granted, the third book did a horrible, sloppy job with it, and it was one of the most disappointing, underwhelming series conclusions I've ever read. But still. The books are ABOUT religion. Period. For those who don't know, here's some key points of the series' plot. (Cut for huge SPOILERS.)

Spoiler:

- The main character, Lyra, is prophesied to be the next Eve. She'll face a major temptation and basically make or break all of humanity based on her decision when the time comes.

- Lyra's mom works for her universe's equivelant of the catholic chuch, complete with inquisitions and heavy-duty zealotry. Her job includes kidnapping children to a secret church-run research facility where their souls are severed from them in the name of researching Original Sin.

- Lyra's dad is gathering an army to kill God. (Well, more accurately, God's regent Metatron.) To Lyra's dad, God ("The Authority") is a tyrant who's been controlling mankind for way too long, and it's long past time for mankind to get rid of him and control its own destiny.

- One of the central things in the series is Dust, an invisible particle that gathers around adults but doesn't attach much to children until they reach adolescence. The Church thinks that Dust is evidence of Original Sin, and therefore wants to destroy it. Both Lyra and her father end up fighting in different ways to preserve Dust, which brings them into major conflict with the church. Turns out that the church is dead wrong; Dust is actually self-aware space dust that's responsible for bestowing consciousness and wisdom on sentient species, as well as generally keeping the universe running smoothly.

- Angels feature a lot in the second and third books. They're basically just more-conscious-than-usual Dust particles, as are the "Authority" (God) and Metatron. They're not divine, they just set themselves up in a cushy position manipulating mankind. Some rebel angels side with Lyra's dad to help overthrow the Authority and Metatron, and they help Lyra on her quest.

- Heavy religious criticism comes up over and over (says one of the characters in book 3, "The Christian religion is a very powerful and convincing mistake, that's all."). The gist of the main theme is that controlling, dogmatic religions are the worst offender in surpressing the human spirit and preventing humanity from reaching its full potential. So who needs 'em?

Most of that stuff is absolutely central to the plot. And it looks like it's all gone out the window now, because New Line Cinema doesn't want to step on any Christian toes.

Sadly, I called it. I was talking to a friend about this soon-to-be movie and mentioned that, knowing Hollywood, it was probably going to be stripped of all the religious references, violent deaths, and philosophical themes so it could be turned into "The Adventures of Lyra and her Wacky Shapeshifting Pet!" or something. And it looks like that's what's happened. If you're going to ditch all that pesky (sac)religious stuff that makes up THE ENTIRE BASIS OF THE PLOT...seriously, why even bother? Geez.

Originally Posted by Acro-nym

I think Artemis Fowl needs to be made into a movie or maybe movie franchise. There are five books, after all (one of which I need to read).

Seconded. Scheming, amoral genius protagonist FTW.

Jam it back in, in the dark.