How to Chug a Beer?

I've been practicing and am really not good at this. This question is directed ONLY at people who have done it and understand how it works: I don't care if you THINK you can, if you do it right, you know it, and only those who know can help me.

Now I'm able to belch on command, and is it the same basic concept as far as opening up the trachea? I feel like I can open my throat and pour it down, but it does not go, it stops right around my windpipe entrance and doesn't push down. Any advice?

PS - I'm practicing with water until I get good at this.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I'm not worried about the beer entering the mouth, it's the liquid going down the throat without swallowing, because you can only swallow so much at once. I know it's possible to open your throat and let it literally pour down like going down a tube, but I don't know what to feel for

I'll try that google search.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

No, it's not at all. There is a way to open your throat and have it act like a drain. If you have no idea what I'm alluding to here, then you obvious have nothing to contribute to the topic. It's a fair question, and I'm sure someone here has had experience with downing 12-16oz of beer in 1-2 seconds without gulping.

(This was directed at galen)

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by JazzFlight

I don't think people who chug beer do so in one motion. It's more like GULP GULP GULP GULP GULP GULP GULP AHHHHHHHH.

Think of the old man from the Man Show: he doesn't gulp. Granted, he's obvious had years of practice and a couple liver transplants, but is there something I'm not realizing in doing this or just need to convince my throat not to chicken out on me?

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I do overthink, but I am not exaggerating in saying I went thrtough 80oz of water in a very short time.

If you've bonged in 1 second, then that's what I'm looking for. It's like the pour directly into the stomach "idea" is merely a throat that can take ALL of the beer? I get that, and one big fluid gulp can take it.

I guess I do have the right idea, just need to stop sucking Thanks for the quick replies.

I was speaking idiomatically.

The free flowing is what I hope to achieve. The man show guy sure can do an outstanding job of downing a lot, so I don't think it's unrealistic

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by galen

Okay. So a much more important question is this: Why do you want to do this so badly?

I didn't realize the post expressed such desperation to make it seem like I want this "badly", but so be it... for fun. People ask me why I would ever jump out of a plane and that's the same responses: I live life for experiences, and I'm going to do it.

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Originally Posted by BZ

Are you retarded? Why would you even think of doing soemthing like this.

Because I'm a bored, lonely old man looking for some kicks in life. Seriously, what the fuck kind of question is that and what would you expect as a response? Get out of my thread.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Guinness is too precious to bong, it MUST be enjoyed!

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Gotta manage it right: I don't drink often at all. Last time I had anything was over a month ago. However, I think that this would still be a fun party trick to learn, and thus I'm gonna give it a try. The money isn't a problem, since it's not a frequent thing for me anyway.

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I made the topic, and no, I can not do it yet. I didn't know what you said was true until you said it.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.