[DnD] Tomb of Horrors (GFF D&D Adventure X)

3 Dice Rolls Arcana Check

A large undead dragon? I had to hit my head against the wall on the off-chance that it would wake me up. Sadly, I wasn't dreaming at all. The bone dragon was obviously the ringleader, and though the path is sealed off by its minions, I know just how to bypass it.

Activate Rubicant Blade Power (move action).
- Garold and Sam teleported by 5 squares to a square of their own choosing.
---- If they don't choose by update time, Garold to E-37; Sam to -C-33.
- GFZ teleported to A-33.
Whirling Blade vs A. Critical Hit: 26+4=30 damage.
Swordmage's Decree at B-32 through D-30; affects A, B and D.
Arcana knowledge check on Dracolich. 17+15=32.


Jam it back in, in the dark.

4 Dice Rolls Sorry, REAL damage to F

48 hours from Garold's post. Assuming GFZ is up for public use again

These walking rocks think they've surrounded me. Little do they realize that they've fallen for my secret weapon! Namely, exotic sword techniques, taught to me by travelers from the Far East, during my time as a ship navigator. Having shown them my fabulous deadly technique, I then engage the sentient rock currently holding my werewolf comrade hostage.

Honorable Blade of the Soaring Heavens!
Twin Dragon Flash!

Sword Burst vs D & F. 7 (or 8 if you consider correct die roll) damage to F.
Move to F-35 (avoid AoO from A; B can't AoO because it's blind)
Aegis of Assault vs. C.
-- Aegis Marks now on A, B, C and D.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

9 Dice Rolls Bare bottom Diplomacy for lulz

I thought for sure the over-sized rock formation's naughty tentacle was the last thing I'd ever feel. But fortunately I'm tougher than that.

"ONE HP IS ALL I NEED!
COME AND KNOCK ME DOWN, YOU MOTHERFUCKING CUNTS!"

While shifting away, I dropped my pants to moon the Geonids with luscious Genasi booty.

Thunderclap Strike vs. C, D and E (need 8+)
-- C & E take 14 thunder damage and are knocked prone.
Action Point: Sword Burst vs C, D and E (need 7+ on D and 5+ on C & E)
-- C D & E take 8 damage.
Minor to moon the Geonids (Diplomacy check why not?)
Shift to E-30

Note: Activate Horn Tusk Hide Armor's Melee Basic Attack vs D/E when (not if ) GFZ is KOed.
Note 2: If GFZ miraculously stays conscious, and a marked Geonid hits someone else, activate immediate reaction to teleport adjacent and attack.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

2 Dice Rolls Chaaaaaarge

My rage abruptly welled up within me. Perhaps it's the unfairness of the thing. The Dracolich hasn't even tried to brainwash me at all. This brought back unpleasant memories of my childhood, when "Grah! Fagsuit" was always the last Genasi picked for any activity. Why, doesn't he know I'd make a really dandy minion? Under his influence, I'd be able to lock down this so-called "Furious Five" in no time at all!

Temporarily bottling down my mutinous thoughts, I focus my attention on getting as far away from the overly-amorous geonid hugging me as I possibly can. It's not good for your reputation to have your adventuring companions catch you in an aroused state, after all.

Move: Escape attempt: Athletics (10+14=24) vs. Fortitude (18).
-- Success. Shift to F-32.
Charge Dracolich, ending at E-34.
-- Attach Melee Basic Attack (13+1+10=24<26). Miss.
Aegis of Assault on Dracolich (doesn't supersede D).

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

1 Die Roll Enervating Slash vs Draco

I suddenly awaken with the taste of dog on my mouth. Garold, you didn't. This is the last straw. First you use me as a pool cleaner, and now you're trying to kiss me? If the dracolich doesn't kill you, I'll throttle you myself!

I shake the cobwebs from my head, and rise unsteadily to my feet. Summoning the last of my powers, I do my best to enervate the dragon. Unfortunately, my attack misses. I am most discouraged at my inability to hit something this large. Perhaps it's time to face the inevitable.

"Listen, this isn't working out at all. I'm running on fumes, and I just got kissed by a dog. You win, Mr. Dragon. You can have me. Eat me. (Actually, do you even have a stomach?) Ravage me. Make me your slave. Or toothpick. Or whatever.

But just let these idiots go.

I'm dropping my sword right now. This is me, surrendering."

Free Action: Second Wind w/o bonus.
Move Action: Stand from Prone.
Standard Action: Enervating Slash vs Dracolich.
-- 12+2+6=20 < 26 miss.
-- Attacks deal half damage vs. allies (save ends).
Free Action: Drop Rubicant Sword.
Minor Action: Sneakily equip Warblade Scimitar (same to-hit bonus; [W] damage reduced from 1d10 to 1d8.

I was speaking idiomatically.

4 Dice Rolls Possible Crit bonus

"Wait, I was surrendering! Why are you still attacking them? Stop that!"

Immediate Interrupt: Aegis of Assault vs. Geonid (instead of Dracolich)
Teleport to G-30, melee basic attack with flanking (+2) and escalating assault bonus (+0).
Hope that 7 damage is enough to kill it. If so, use free surge granted by Ravenclaw Warblade Scimitar property.

Note: Any attack that doesn't include GFZ as a target takes -2 penalty to hit. Claw may or may not have hit the halfling.

_____
TURN BEGINS:

Option A: Geonid is dead

"Oops, sorry about that, force of habit!"

"Anyway, my lord and master, here are some spoils of war which you may find of interest! Wow, look at this magic scroll - it says it can remove a single enduring effect."

"Sir Dragon, you are obviously suffering from an affliction of undeath. Please, allow me to heal you."

Move to E-33, right on top of Slim.
Minor: Rifle through his pack and take out Scroll (Remove Affliction)

.
Standard: Perform ritual on Dracolich.
-- Right, now I get a natural 20 here.
-- Heal Check 24. Dracolich takes damage equal to 1/4 of maximum HP.

_____
Option B: Geonid still lives

"Listen up, rock man. I'm busy surrendering here. Now's not the time to punch wolf-men, no matter how much they deserve it. Buzz off!"

Standard: Booming Blade vs Geonid.
-- 4+2+12=18<20, miss.
-- Missed with Swordmage At-Will: Free Action: Activate Blades of Fiery Wrath
---- Critical hit! 2d6+4+2=18 fire damage.
---- Use surge granted by Ravenclaw Warblade Scimitar.
Move to E-33, right on top of Slim.
Minor: Rifle through his pack and take out Scroll (Remove Affliction)

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

The ritual killed my new lord and master? No, it cannot be! Such a thing will look horrible on my minion resume! Now, there is only one thing to do. If Gra-fa-zut cannot function as a minion, then he should just be something else!

Surge to full. Pick up sword. Take out Treeform Box. Change into a Banana Tree forever~~~~~~

How ya doing, buddy?