I regret not fucking Margaret Moore, what a fine specimen of a woman she was. There are two reasons I didn't: I had a girlfriend at the time and SHE WAS ONE OF MY BEST MATE'S MOTHER. That aside she was a fucking gorgeous female. Easily the hottest over-30 y.o I have ever seen.
I was supposed to picking this guy up before we were heading to a party. When I got to his house, I was greeted as always by Margaret. Adrian (her son) was held up at work (a fact the douche neglected to tell me). She invited me in and offered me a drink, as I was still on my Provisional license I neglected her offer. She twisted my arm and I had a couple of beers with her. I had always got along well with her so we had talked fairly often, but I definitely noticed a flirty edge to her conversation. She then turned on some music and started dancing and she asked me to dance with her. We danced for a bit then she kissed me. I was pretty shocked, I stood back and asked what the hell she thought she was doing.
"You've never thought about it?" she said.
"Thought about what?" I enquired.
"Fucking me."
The way she said that still haunts me. I was literally speechless. After about a minute I said something lame like "I have a girlfriend" or "You're Adrian's mum." I then left the house and waited for Adrian to arrive home. After about 15 minutes I rang him and asked how long he was going to be. He said he was going to be about another hour and a half, but he had another ride to the party if I didn't want to give him one. After hearing this I nearly went back inside, but I didn't. I left for the party and the rest is history. I haven't seen or heard from her since then.
The real biting part about the whole ordeal was the fact I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me with my friend about two weeks later. He told me personally while I was at work. I would have given anything at that point to go back and fuck his mum.
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I regret that I didn't stay longer at a party 3 Saturdays ago. Apparently a chick I met there liked me and was horny as hell, so while looking for me found out I left from my best friend. Being in the state she was she fucked him instead. Damn.
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Didn't like you that much then did she, champ?
Jam it back in, in the dark.
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