My [real] Angst [hueg liek xbox]

Reznor, the number one most important thing for you to come to grips with is that in order survive - literally - you're probably going to have to leave your family behind. What you're describing is a situation that no one would be able to remedy, no matter how much they wanted to.

You're going to have to somehow ditch the idea that getting yourself out of this situation is selfish, because it's the only way you're going to make it.

I agree with whoever said that you should just walk away. You're probably going to be hungry and jobless for five minutes, but I have complete confidence that you'll pull yourself out of that situation very quickly. Do you live near a large city, or can you get to one? If so, that's probably your ticket to freedom. Public transportation is very cheap. If you think you can stick it out in your current situation long enough to get a job first, that would be ideal. But even if you don't, you have to get out of there.

What happened to your brother is sad, but it wasn't your fault and you have a responsibility to yourself. You're never going to be any good to anyone else if you don't have your own shit straight.

Good luck to you.

Jam it back in, in the dark.