[DnD] Crusader (GFF D&D Adventure 2)

I had spent a few minutes browsing the missing wizard's book collection before realising that the Horde had all wandered off. I followed the sounds of swearing before coming across what appeared to be a fairly basic magic mirror door thing. I stepped through.

I found the horde who appeared to be playing with some levers. The big fellow had a slightly surprised look about him and what little hair he had was standing on end. A door was open in the corner of the room and I peered through seeing some form of arcane device. I examined it from the safety of the doorway, hoping that in my extensive studies I had encountered this kind of thing before.

Most amazing jew boots

The room seemed safe and the dwarf seemed to have found a secret door. I opened it, bracing myself for the seemingly inevitable lethal trap to trigger.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I was beginning to think that a nice, simple battle against an army of orcs might have been preferable to all these tricks and traps. I had never done too well in my mystical traps lessons, being more interested in the throwing destructive blasts of ice around lessons.

At any rate, the big metal snake had decided not to kill me just yet which I had to concede was probably a good thing. The wizard did at least seem to have had a fair bit of cash to have set this lot up so I lived in hope of finding some decent treasure somewhere down here. Some magic boots that made me levitate would be nice and possibly some sort of talisman that would let me summon up a nice glass of wine any time I fancied one, I always thought better with a glass in my hand.

Turning away from the door, I rejoined the others. The child seemed to have climbed into a big hole in the floor for some reason, possibly in pursuit of the large ruby she was clutching. Thinking that the dwarves would be able to get her out with all the rope the were carrying.

My attention was drawn to the other rooms. I had never been any good at lock picking so that room was probably out of the question from the start. The chest in the other room looked fairly harmless, not so the two mechanical dogs which if the snake was anything to go by would probably not stay still should someone rush into the room.

I summoned up my mage hand and sent it floating into the room whilst I stood a couple of feet back from the door. I first went to the chain and gave it a very gentle tuck, to see if it was attached to anything through the hole in the wall. I then wrapped the slack of the chain round the legs of one of the dogs then the other (Assuming there's enough slack). That modicum of health and safety precautions in place, I then floated my hand over to the chest and tried to open it.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Ooh, the sneaky wizard bastard, this room looked like a particularly vicious trap. Anyway, appearances can often be decieving, so I used my mage hand to lift the rocks out of the chest one at a time in case there was anything else in there.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I moved the chest to see if there was anything underneath it, not holding out much hope. I then retrieved a few of the rocks with my mage hand and chucked them into the room with the locked chest, to see if the floor would collapse or anything.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I spent several minutes examining the shiny rock. I could sense that it was in some way magical but I'd be buggered if I could work out what it did. I tossed it to the ugly dwarf, surmising that given his race's predeliction for mining he could probably find a use for a lump of rock.

Returning to the others and the big metal snake thing, I used my mage hand to move the big ruby into the room, very slowly and then followed it in, a step at a time.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Throwing caution to the wind, I crossed the room and made for the newly opened door, stopping little distance into the next room as I could manage whilst still being technically out of the snake room.

FELIPE NO

Oh my, it seemed as though we had stumbled upon a veritable treasure trove of arcane knowledge. I scanned the bookshelf hungrily, looking for anything that looked like it might have learnable spells written in it. I then looked over the artifacts on the workbench and desk, sensing for magical auras or any other signs of enchantment.

"Have a seat guys" I vaguely gestured to the others "I could be here a while".

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Horatio Halfwit was a research wizard of some note so I grabbed the book bearing his name, hoping to learn something helpful.

Cursing at the missing wizard who had left only the more complicated and obscure of his secret powers on display, I resigndedly turned to the sheaf of papers the dwarf was struggling with to see if I could make any more sense of them.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I took the potion from the dwarf, thinking that a healing potion would have been infinitely more useful. It appeared as though we had found the sword we were looking for although this all seemed rather too easy (Which, I reminded myself was why we took this mission on in the first place). Not that I didn't trust the two warriors but I peeked through the mirror myself to see if there were any secret compartments or switches or anything in the small room. I also looked at the back of the mirror, in case there was anything interesting there.

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It seemed then, that our work here was done. I looked around for a bag or soemthing I could make a bag out of in order to carry away as much of the wizard's knowledge as possible. Although I understood little of it now, who was to say that in the future, as my powers increased some of it might not start making sense. I also helped myself to 30 gold pieces, a man has to eat now and then after all. With a sack of books and scrolls over my shoulder, I headed back to the room with the levers, not wanting to step back through the first mirror without my pals, just in case the house had been occupied by an army or orcs while we were in the basement or something.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

To say I was surprised to be accosted on the way out of the house would be a lie. To be accosted by elves however was rather more surprising, especially ones with an ogre for company. This was clearly going to end in violence.

I edged back towards the safety of the doorway, hoping to reach cover before the arrows started flying. I especially didn't want to annoy the ogre, having had a bad experience with an ogress and a bottle of very strong brandy once.

Hoping to cause some dissent in the enemy ranks I used my ghost sound magic to whisper in the ogre's ear.

"Hey Klaus, why are you taking orders from these flimsy pointy ears eh? I bet those nice shorter fellows over there would be much more fun to hang around with, they certainly look the type to get in lots of fights and I bet Klaus loves fighting! Go on Klaus, hit the pointy ears while they aren't looking, it'll feel sooooo good."

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

After a predictably brief exchange of insults, the elves opened fire although my friend's thick armour stopped pretty much all the arrows. I unleashed my powerful ice spell at the lead elf and ogre before ducking back into the doorway of the front room.

New frosty ray spell at ogre and closest elf, move back into doorway at j8

I was speaking idiomatically.

The ogre was down and as they had demonstrated against the dragon, if the Horde were good at anything it was fighting prone enemies. Of more immediate danger were the elven archers who were rapidly turnin my companions into pincushions. Hoping to upset their aim, I unleashed a barage of spells at them.

Acid arrow at elf R11, spend an action point, Burst of flame at same elf, move one square west into cover

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

The battle was in danger of turning into a massacre and the Horde were routing, offering their unprotected backs to the rampaging ogre. The elves had dispersed, precluding any more flashy explosions. I stepped back to the doorway and unleashed an ice ray at the ogre, hoping to slow it down if nothing else.

Move one square east, Ray of Frost on ogre.

FELIPE NO

The dwarf had bought us some breathing room and time to think. The elves and their tame ogre wouldn't take long to get through the door though. In an ideal world, we would set up a series of cunning traps in the style of child prodigy Macalayly of Culcin in his command performance Whate happened when ye childe was left at ye house with no adulte supervision but I feared there was no time for that. Instead, I plotted up in cover, ready to blast an ice ray at the first thing to come through the door not waving a white flag.

Stand in cover, ready an ice ray to fire when the door opens

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

The dwarf tossed me the sword and I deftly caught it with my off-hand, spinning as I did so and dropping it at the feet of the big human. As I finished my spin I felt a sharp pain in my side as one of the elves lunged at me, scraping my ribs with his crude blade and ripping a small hole in my new robes.

I cried out in pain and felt my choler rising. As I grew more angry a number of things happened, almost beyond my control.

My will enveloped me like a shield, deflecting the blade to some extent and limiting the damage to my robe. My cry of pain turned to a scream of anger and my robes burst into flames, wreathing my in smoke and fire, confounding my enemy's attempts to injure me further. I raised my staff and blasted the elf full in the face with an ice ray, daring him to strike at me again, the flames and shards of ice flashing reflections of red and blue in my eyes to match the face paint I really wish I'd had time to buy.

Drop sword at Arg's feet, Shield, Fireburst Robes, Ray of Frost at the elf that hit me

Jam it back in, in the dark.

The elves retreated in the face of the dwarf's onslaught and rather uncharitably, shot the other dwarf who slumped to the ground unconcious. There was little I could do for him, having basically nothing in the way of healing skills so instead I took advantage of the bunching up of the elves to blast them with flame before ducking back into cover.

Flame Burst on square N10, move to H6

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I had no particular desire to get any closer to the ogre or put myself in line of sight of the elves' bows so I stood my ground, launching another fire burst spell through the door into the corridor. If it was a battle of attrition they were after I was just the ranged attack wielding, cowardly retreating elf for the job.

I thought some suitable music would unnerve our opponents so using my Ghost Sound spell, I sent the popular musical hit Please sir, light thee once again my fire by those doyennes of the scene, Take Thee That drifting across the battlefield. I thought the ugly dwarf in particular would appreciate that, he looked to me the kind of fellow to enjoy music from a group of virile young men in tight trousers.

YouTube Video

Flame Burst at ogre's NE corner (L8 is that? The numbers have got lost), Ghost Sound in corridor

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

The ogre was on it's last legs, cut to ribbons from the onslaught of the dwarves and I turned my attention to the elves lurking outside. Clearly anyone rushing out to engage them would be riddled with arrows before they took a step so blindly charging out the door would be foolish.

It was then I remembered the exploding sweets we had procured in our earlier adventure. I tapped the big guy on the shoulder and asked him to drag the recently deceased elf over to the outside wall of the house and shouted at the clever dwarf to throw me the sweets, hoping they'd understand my requests. I then moved to the wall myself, blasting the ogre with an ice ray almost as an afterthought.

Ray of Ice at ogre, move due south to wall

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

With a deft swing of the sword, the big human decapitated the ogre. Quite why he couldn't have done that ten minutes ago I would never know.

With the death of their muscle, the remaining elves fled, denying me the opportunity to put any of my cunning schemes into action, something I was quite upset about, they really were some very cunning plans.

Oh well, at least we had all survived more or lss intact and still had the sword. I suggested to the big guy that he might want to clean it off and cover it up, in case we attracted any further unwarranted attention on our trip back to town. I didn't hold out much hope of the elf carrying any decent equipment, as he seemed to be little more than a common sell-sword but I eyed up his bow in case it was better than my new one which in retrospect was a premature purchase, the benefit of hindsight eh? I helped myself to his arrows anyway and any more I found lying around undamaged.

I couldn't speak for the Horde but I was tired out after our exertions of the day. I still wasn't sure if my undead companions actually slept but I was fairly sure they wouldn't mind if I did. I checked the wizards pantry for something edible thinking if I didn't find anything I'd eat some trail rations and then went to see what kind of sleeping arrangements the dead wizard had in his house.

"Perhaps it might be prudent if we sleep in shifts tonight chaps, just in case those elves come back with more friends, assuming of course you fellows do want to sleep here and not just head back to town now".

I wasn't expecting much of a coherent response.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I sensed that the others were keen to get away from the house and go camping. Sounded like a good plan to me, it meant I could try out my new campfire spell!

I gathered up the elf's arrows, leaving the flashy looking dagger to someone who might get close enough to an enemy to use it, wondering as we left if it might not be a good idea to set fire to the house so any would-be assailants would think we'd all perished in the inferno.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I followed the dwarf as he searched for a suitable campsite, using my light spell to illuminate the tip of my staff. If I was honest I was rather excited, it had been a while since I did any proper outdoors camping and this would prove an excellent opportunity both to try out my new spell and have a proper read of some of the books I had nabbed from the wizard's house. As we went, I kept an eye out for any suitable game animals, thinking that procuring dinner might be the best use for my new, second-hand arrows.

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Roused early from my slumber, I found the big chap chatting to what at first glance appeared to be the lord who tasked us with this quest in the first place. It seemed a remarkable coincidence that he had found us in this whole city so I pretended to remain asleep while trying to sense any sort of magic afoot here, aware that I was probably not the only person in the city with the powers of illusion (Even if mine were only in potion form).

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Whoever we were talking to was clearly up to something although quite what I could not determine. It seemed to me we would achieve nothing through out and out confrontation though. After all, the only reward we had been promised was whatever loot we found at the wizard's house so it didn't really matter who we gave the sword to but the help of a proper lord, assuming our employer had been one and this was not he, would be invaluable in finsing out who had chucked us in that dungeon.

I used my own ghost sound spell to whisper in the ears of each of my companions "There is no wolf, there was a spell cast from over in the shadows, be on your guard and let's try to figure this out before we start killing people". I had no idea if they'd understand me or not but it wouldn't hurt to try I figured.

I got to my feet and engaged Broden in conversation, keeping my senses alert for any further magic activity from the shadows and leaning nonchalently on my staff, that being the best excuse I could think of to have it to hand.

"So, Broden, it was mightily fortuitous of you to bump into us here. Had we known you were engaged in such a noble pursuit, we would have hurried to meet you and not wasted time resting up in this out of the way warehouse. I'll admit I'm surprised that you needed us to go and fetch such a simple thing as a silver sword from that wizard's house though. I mean, you can get silver weapons from most good weapon shops, there's no need to employ a wizard for such things although I must admit it wasn't particularly well hidden, the big mechanical walrus was practially helpful, not a threat at all"

My reasoning was that if this Broden had been inside the wizard's house, he might show some reaction to the mention of a walrus, as it was actually a snake. A simple ruse, granted but I had just woken up and thinking on the fly half asleep was never a skill of mine.

As I spoke, I sidled over towards the shadows, hoping to get a better view of what might be there aqnd hoping whatever or whoever it was wouldn't realise I was on to their ruse.

Jam it back in, in the dark.