Pub snacks

Are you guys seriously suggesting that midway through a piss-up you'd go to all the bother of going for a pizza or something? Fuck that. Notwithstanding the fact that eating's cheating, it's got to be those Sahara nuts surely? They're like fucking crack I swear, you just can't stop eating them. Other than that it's probably going to be a pack of Frazzles, they're like methadone for a bacon addict. Occasionally pork scratchings seem like a good idea too and they always are except the last one in the packet is always either not crispy or covered in hair. If you must eat something on the way home, you can't beat the tradition of buying a large donner with chilli sauce and salad, fishing out all the salad and dumping it on the pavement, spilling chilli sauce all down your front and eating maybe half of the kebab at most while you watch the fights outside the kebab shop.

In reality though, if it's a proper drinking session, all the coke you've snorted stops you passing out and at the same time renders you incapable of eating anything so my honest answer would be pretty close to Bernie's prediction: Another line of punnet.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Pretzels are a bit upmarket for most British pubs. That's not to say they're not nice though, you're just more likely to find them at a finger buffet at a party than as a pub snack.

Pub snacks over here are basically crisps or nuts. You'll always have salted and dry roasted peanuts and normally at least one other variety, chilli or honey roasted are pretty common. Crisps you'll have basic salted, salt and vinegar and cheese and onion and probably some meat ones and chilli ones and some other variety like Frazzles or Quavers. Pretty much every pub I've ever been in follows this pattern, it's just the way things should be I guess.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

That's why it helps to be mates with whoever owns and or lives above the pub. They generally let you pop into the kitchen and make that kind of stuff yourself. Cheese and onion though? So, so wrong. A proper crisp buttie should have salt and vinegar in, possibly a processed cheese slice or two if you're feeling adventurous.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by Timberwolf8889

Buffalo wings has my mouth watering though, shame you can't find them anywhere about here it seems.

Sadly we raise only the wingless breeds of buffalo over here mate.

Aren't Buffalo wings just chicken wings in barbecue sauce though? I know our local kebab emporium does those and we're proper provincial down here, I'd be amazed if you can't find somewhere that does them. I think the petrol station round the corner from us does microwaveable ones too. Take a trip to KFC, buy some wings and smother them in free barbecue sauce, job done right?

I rather drunkenly bought a microwave shepherds pie from the garage the other night on the way home. It was about four quid for a tiny portion but it tasted amazing. Nicola refused to eat any of it, I suspect she may not have been as drunk as I was.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?