Are you happy now?

Without getting too ANGST with this, I'd have to say that if there's anything that makes me discontent it's my past. To be content with the present I'd either have to erase my haunting memories or overcome them completely. I feel there's always time to strive for success otherwise; I just find it extremely difficult to do when bad thoughts are always keeping me down. And yeah I can block them out and ignore them for a time, but then as soon as some bad shit happens I just lose all my will power again. I want to be free for this sort of things so I can just enjoy the present. Right now it seems like every time I'm enjoying something in life, I think to something that's wrong that I still have to fix, something to worry about, something that bothers me. Because of that, I have a hard time enjoying anything. And it's not like I want it that way; it's just the way my brain works.

I'd be content with having a clean start, I guess. But the problem is that there will always be regrets and bad memories, so I feel that even if I were to somehow overcome my past then it would only be a temporary fix.

Jam it back in, in the dark.