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25 Points - Papers, Please
Everything about this game is calculated to make you feel like a terrible human being, which makes it the most thematically and atmospherically successful game of the year. 25 Points - Monaco Skills is the Gentleman. As the point man on this operation, he knows the layout of the gallery and the locations of the masterpieces we're after. As a master of disguise, he easily slips in and out of rooms, looting safes and patrons. This job is a cakewalk. Tails is the Cleaner. As the muscle, he knocks out a guard from behind before they even know something's wrong. He then shoots the guard anyway, because he has two bullets and might as well use one of them now. Diss is the Mole. He finds the concept of doors personally offensive: why should he bother having to operate a plank of wood when a hole in the wall would make his comings and goings that much more efficient? Diss tunnels way into the next room, where five guards have surrounded Tails and a corpse, summoned by the sound of a gunshot. I am the Locksmith. Within the first five seconds of this operation, I have used my lockpicking gifts to hastily hide in a stairwell. From perfect safety, I watch as Tails and Diss are swiftly dispatched by the gallery's security force. Having gone through this same routine in the last six heists we pulled today, we have this down to a pattern: I quickly dash in, revive them, and return to safety for the next accident. Only this time, I fail to time a motion detector correctly and set off an alarm. I do not make it back to the stairwell. Skills, carrying nine paintings at once, steals a car and leaves the gallery completely undetected. Our skeletons remain in the lobby forever, a grisly warning to those who would dare rob the Galerie D'Art. 20 Points - Rayman Legends Most joyful platforming experience of the year. Also includes almost the entirety of Rayman Origins because why not.
20 Points - Fire Emblem Awakening Soundtrack of the year, RPG of the year, Gregor of the year. ![]() 5 Points - Mario & Luigi: Dream Team Basically just more of the same from AlphaDream, and maybe not as good as Inside Story, but it's solid. Bros. Attacks get more and more intricate every game, and they admit that they're essentially minigames at this point by making minigames out of them. Giant battles are outstanding. Massifs are characters of the year. 5 Points - Room of 1000 Snakes Best archaeological simulator since La-Mulana. Jam it back in, in the dark.
Last edited by THE POWER OF WATER; Jan 25, 2014 at 05:23 AM.
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