New Year's Parties

I was mainly ill over the new year, which was a bit of a shitter since new years day is also my birthday. Instead of getting twice as hilariously drunk as on any standard, single celebration like I was promising myself, I mostly just had to be content with holding onto and treasuring those odd moments when my face didn't feel like the interior of the sun.

At the party, I had an awkward white man moment straight out of a Ricky Gervais script when I thought I had offended a black lad, only to come away realising I was just being a drunken idiot.

On the way home from the same party in a fit of baileys and lemsip induced delirium I punched in a chippy window and robbed 8 cans of coke and 2 packets of processed cheese slices. I can't do much about the coke since my housemates already drank half of it, but maybe I should donate the cheese to charity.

How ya doing, buddy?