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Originally Posted by Sol
You could stand to not be so ambiguous about the settings your story will take place in. Does the 'naked city' have a name? What is the name of the restaurant? Does he know anyone inside the restaurant? While it's fine to leave details of other people inherently vague if they aren't important, doing the same to the environment makes the story bland and unimaginative. Obviously you can't take the time to create a fully fleshed out world in a short story, so you need to be certain that whatever imagry you use will be potent enough to make up for that lacking.
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Nah, he's got it so the opening hits the ground running. The point of this paragraph is to introduce the protagonist, whilst only planting small seeds of things such as the major setting. The
name of the restaurant? Come on. We don't need to know the guys precise longitude and latitude in the opening few words.
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