Sex: Take It Or Leave It

I agree with Shin. Those who aren't fascinated by sex simply haven't had an example of it that worked for them.

Personally, I think sex is the greatest multiplayer activity in the history of man. Before Xbox Live there was T'n'A. A partner that doesn't agree that it's an awesome way to spend 30-45 minutes is simply not a good partner for me.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Angel Of Light

Its not like she is not giving me any sex for her to punish me, its just her dealing with her own personal demons and her own low sex drive. I think I owe it to her as a respectful, understanding, and above anything else loving bf to give her patience and respect her needs, and her thoughts toward the subject of sex.

But, if you're going to go that far out of your way to make her happy, doesn't she owe it back to you as a respectful, understanding, and loving girlfriend to try and figure out what is wrong with herself?

"Thanks for loving me and treating me well and refuting, essentially, one of the core aspects of your manhood just to make me happy. In return I will make no attempts whatsoever to change myself to make you happier."

Am I wrong here?

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Devo

I think it's pretty obvious she's getting some on the side.

I agree. That explanation sums up all the goings-on pretty nicely.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

OH ALRIGHT IN THAT CASE.

How ya doing, buddy?

I have a feeling neither of those two will be doing any more posting in this thread.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Chibi Neko

You really want the honest truth? (knowing that Angel will be reading this) ..... I really would not care as long as there was no love behind it.

Well, there's your green light man! Take advantage of this wondrous of most wondrous situations. At the very least, when she does end up getting jealous, you can call her out for being a lying, stuck-up bitch.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by a lurker

You're creepy.

I don't follow.

He's being given permission to sleep around. If he doesn't take advantage, he's a moron.

He's lying if he says he doesn't want to.

Why am I the creepy one?

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I'm not saying it to be a scumbag. In his situation, even if don't want to fuck someone else, I would be driven to call bullshit on such a completely unrealistic statement. NO, she is not okay with him having relations with others. YES, she is a pretentious bitch for saying so to defend her disinterest in fucking her boyfriend.

If he's as good a guy as he wants us to believe, he doesn't deserve to be led around by someone who is full of shit.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

No... it's common sense. Exclusivity is part of the deal, particularly in a long-term relationship. She can say what she wants, if her boyfriend fucks another chick, she's going to be hurt. And if she isn't hurt, then everyone wins! Hurray!

Which is why I made my suggestion.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Ok then. Maybe intrusive, but still not creepy. Even so, however, if they didn't want people's opinions, they shouldn't have posted.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I wasn't aware I had suggested that he do it today... or even with any kind of immediacy. Just that he should.

And the jury's out on whether or not it would be considered "cheating".

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Chibi Neko

So BurningRanger, we are happy with things the way they are, so telling Angel so go out and get some is not going to accomplish anything because he is your opposite as far as the topic is concerned, not all men get a girlfriend just for sex.

That's not my point. No, not all men get a girlfriend just for sex. However, and this is a fact, there is not a single situation in which would be asked of someone he already enjoys the company of, "Would you like this person better if you could have sex with her?" and he would say no.

It's like asking, "If you had the same exact boyfriend, only slightly more attractive, would you like him more?" YES I KNOW your knee jerk reaction is going to make you say "Looks don't matter to me." And it's true, to the majority of people who aren't asshats, looks aren't important. But that doesn't change the fact that even the most non-asshattic person in the world would still like the person they're with 1% more if they were 1% more attractive.

Same situation with sex. No matter how much he says he's willing to wait for you, and sex isn't important to him, etc etc etc, he's not going to push you off of him if you jump on top of him screaming dirty phrases. He's going to be very happy.

NOTE: I AM NOT TELLING YOU TO GO AND DO THAT IMMEDIATELY. I speak hypothetically, nothing more.

Now, upon you saying that you would be okay with him getting his fix from other women, which is a foul and egregious lie, I can no longer stay quiet about this. Whatever the veracity, saying what you said means you're making a few terrible assumptions.

If it's true,

A) You assume that your loving, sophisticated boyfriend, who is willing to wait for you, would ever want to have sex with someone without emotional attachment. (As you said, the condition of your acceptance was that it there be "no love.")

B) You also assume that sex is a purely physical pleasure. Which as others in this thread have agreed, it is not.

C) You assume, probably, that it would be a one time thing. If it became a consistent thing then you most certainly would not stand for it. Who knows, after the years of celibacy, maybe he'd become addicted to it and run off with the girl. Chances are equally good he wouldn't, but he might.

If it's not true, and this really grinds my gears,

D) You assume that you have such a monopoly over him that he would never, ever take you up on the offer, giving you the freedom to say things like that to curry favor and look like the understanding, mellow girlfriend, without the fear of a bullshit call. Which is an insult. To him and to mankind.

In fact, your last post pretty much described D to the tee.

By the way:

Quote:

so telling Angel so go out and get some is not going to accomplish anything because he is your opposite

I believe you were the one who encouraged him to do so first.

Double Post:

Originally Posted by a lurker

If you're incapable of understanding how you come across, maybe you should stop communicating entirely.

I wonder how 'stuck-up' even factors into anything. Words mean things, people!

At no point during the post you quoted did I specify a timeframe. Only that he should.

Originally Posted by www.thefreedictionary.com

Adj. 1. stuck-up - used colloquially of one who is overly conceited or arrogant;

It is arrogant of her to say she condones adultery (in essence, I understand that they are not married) purely on the grounds that she knows he won't do it.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by a lurker

I lost the argument, so here's a weak personal shot.

Indeed.

I was speaking idiomatically.