How do you deal with things out of your control?

I recently had Lymphoma, a form of cancer that is commonly associated with Melanoma and I totally understand how you're feeling. All those questions you're asking and the feeling of helplessness is all too familiar to me. Unfortunately, there's no one way of dealing with this kind of shit I can't hand you a book and tell you chapter 3 will solve your problems. There IS no solution because what's happening is terrible and completely random. You have to find what works for you and go with it no matter what because staying positive for your friend will mean a lot to them. I know that I wouldn't have dealt with my cancer nearly as well as I did without my family and friends there for me. Personally, I dealt with it by acting like it didn't matter, like it was nothing. I mocked it on a daily basis and made totally inappropriate cancer jokes no matter where I was, no matter who I was talking to and it really helped. It'll be different because it's not you who's sick, it's your friend so just be there for him and do what you can to help him and hopefully that will make the feeling of helplessness less overwhelming. Honestly, there is no good way to express my appreciation to people who treated me like nothing was wrong the whole way through, it helped like you cannot imagine.

If you're up for it, talking to a psychiatrist might help. I saw mine on a weekly basis and even though we never did any of the stereotypical "How does that make you feel?" kinds of stuff, it was a real boost to go in and talk to someone who's completely objective. best of luck to you and your friend.

Jam it back in, in the dark.