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Umma · Local time: Apr 11, 2006, 10:49 AM

She can't *really* not want to be your friend anymore... she's just probably pissed off that you think like that... that doesn't justify ending a friendship.

I have a friend with whom I can't talk anything religious related because we argue about even the smallest matters... we just keep our opinions to ourselves, and we're close friends. You could try that instead of trying to convince her you are right and don't argue were the topic to be brought up again.

You can't lose a friend for a disagreement on something that I'm betting doesn't affect either of you.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Umma · Local time: Apr 11, 2006, 08:13 PM

Well, as I said, I can't talk about religion with a friend of mine who's a real fanatic or we end up fighting... but I no longer push too much on those matters because I know she'll just keep talking crap and we won't agree on anything. I guess on these situations someone has to be the better person...

In general, if it was someone you don't know, it shouldn't matter they don't like you for a stupid reason as disagreeing on some topic, but you can't let a little problem like that come between friends.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Umma · Local time: Apr 12, 2006, 07:54 PM

Originally Posted by a lurker

You think most people would want to be friends with known racists (in their opinion)?

How open-minded of you.

Well, it wouldn't bother *me*, at least... Besides, if it was a problem, it'd be a problem when you just met that person, not when you have already found out you like that person as a friend.

Though I had girlfriend since I was 14 and when I found out she was a homosexual, I stopped seeing her as often and now I haven't spoken with her for about 2 years. Of course, that's different because it's not an insignificant issue.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Umma · Local time: Apr 12, 2006, 10:11 PM

Originally Posted by PUG1911

Well that's another thing. What is an insignificant issue to some, is a significant issue to others.

Yes, that's true. That's why one of the two must be the better person. My reaction wasn't the most rational one... but I don't think I'd be comfortable with someone like that.

Although that affected me directly. Now, talking about whether peanut butter is a food or not, that's just opinion on a little subject.

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Umma · Local time: Apr 13, 2006, 10:33 AM

Originally Posted by a lurker

You mean racism is more insignificant to you than homosexuality?

No, the other way around actually. As long as it's not *my* race that's being attacked, why would I care what my friends think of other races? But I couldn't be a friend with a lesbian. I don't know how to deal with that!

Originally Posted by a lurker

You also mean to tell me that racism is blatant while homosexuality is sneaky?

In the case I mentioned, it was. But I'm not saying it's the case always. You can't really know someone is racist until they have to give an opinion on the subject, and even then...

Like that about the illegal immigrants. Just not agreeing with them for sneaking into the US doesn't make the person a racist. It's just easier to accuse someone of racism since the illegal immigrants happen to be mestizos. To do that, it's a poor arguement.

How ya doing, buddy?

Umma · Local time: Apr 15, 2006, 11:11 AM

Originally Posted by a_lurker

That's what I said. You feel homosexuality is more significant as a personality flaw than racism.

To be a close friend of someone with either of those traits, yeah. I feel that way.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

You knew her for two years when you were both teenagers, it's not like fourteen year olds really discuss being lesbians in a community that breeds people like you.

No no. We were 14 when we met. It was one of my friends who found out about her being homosexual... kind of, but then confronted her and she admitted it. I was 17 at the time. I *might* have overreacted back then; we're not close friends anymore because of how I started being around her after that.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

Did she just tell you or did she feel you up or something?

That's the kind of thing I'm afraid she might do.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Umma · Local time: Apr 15, 2006, 09:59 PM

It's a natural feeling. I didn't choose to feel this way, I just *do*. Why would I want to distance myself from a friend?

FELIPE NO

Umma · Local time: Apr 16, 2006, 11:26 AM

Originally Posted by PUG1911

There are plenty of reasons to distance yourself from friends. I was just a little surprised that yours was a concern that she might molest you.

Ok, that was an exaggeration. Sorry. I forgave her for kissing me once. But since I had a little too much to drink to properly object, I was just pissed off at her for a couple of weeks.

Originally Posted by PUG1911

Wouldn't that same concern go for guys with whom you are friends as well? Aren't they supposed to be sex crazed, at least as much so as lesbians?

Maybe they are, but I know how to handle guys. This other thing, however, is new for me.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

Also, do you maintain friendships with boys?

Yeah, I have two close guy friends. Why?

Originally Posted by PUG1911

I mean, you more or less said that it was an irrational feeling, so, why let it determine your behaviour instead of working against something that you can't justify?

She makes me uncomfortable!

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?