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Without having to suffer through it in person. If this series continues at the same level as Davies' "Rose" premiere opener, it'll be finally and decisively exterminated by Season end, and Davies will supplant former producer John Nathan Turner as the hated face of Whovian destruction.Davies is purported to be a fan of Who. HOW!?? There's not a spark of originality in Dr Who DVD...the whole thing looks like a cut-and-paste exercise."Troughton changed into Pertwee...and fought the Autons", you can almost hear Davies musing, "So, that's what I'll have my Doctor do". Er...yeah, Russell. Except the author of that particular episode, Robert Holmes, had writing skills more accomplished than on evidence here. (Plotting and dialogue are shockingly bad, and scenes lurch from one to the other with a total lack of tension.)"Baker was wacky in his opening episode...so I'll have Eccleston comment about his ears, fail at card tricks, and -- ", envisage a fit of giggling here, "-- I'll make a gay joke, to be subversive at prime time!" The scene with Rose's mum making goo-goo eyes at the Doctor was akin to an episode of "Hollyoaks". The only Doctor Davies needs, clearly, is one of the Script variety. (Piper's "I've got the bronze" was the limpest sop to Buffy-dom I've heard in a long time.)From the badly-conceived "kinetic" opening sequence with Billie Piper (who might be quite decent, if she had some half-way competent lines, and a director that can move a camera), right through to her ghastly "slow motion run to the TARDIS" at the end, this episode is the epitome of a limp, cheesy, campfest. Even the formerly-reviled 20th Century Fox US telemovie with Paul McGann was of an order of competence higher than evident here. (And THAT had a TARDIS control room that didn't look like a cast-off from "Farspace". That "direct inside-to-outside" door conduit has to be the worst thing I've seen in Who since its equivalent in the Peter Cushing Dalek movie excursions.)Autons. A terrific badguy. Reduced here to an adversary with all the menace from "Rentaghost".

Jam it back in, in the dark.