Let's be friends

I'm on good terms with most of my exes. Some I keep in touch with more than others, but assuming there's a common ground of interest, there's no real reason not to get along on some level after a breakup. Being bitter is weak.

Of course, if they're whiny or twatty about it, I have no time for that either. But that goes for my friends as much as ex-girlfriends or anybody else in my life for that matter. Like Jamma said, it depends on the breakup.

parKbench: I agree that ex-wives and ex-girlfriends are different in some ways since there's more of an emotional investment when it's a wife, but the bitterness between you and your ex-wife seems really strong, and might make any kind of relationship hard until you both get over it and are moving on. In a way it doesn't really matter if it's a girlfriend, or wife, or even a rival co-worker.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by parKbench

I agree with you, Live. If you were in love with a girl, I don't understand how you can turn that love off like a switch. You would either be lying to yourself that you want to be friends, or maybe you were never in love in the first place.

If you are really in love with someone you would be happy as long as they're happy, regardless of whether you're the source of their happiness. True love isn't selfish.

I think the most important thing is whether you can still respect your ex after the breakup. Breakups can happen just because you're not right for eachother, but sometimes you find out they're malicious or petty or otherwise bad people, and it's hard to respect someone and be friends with them in that case.

Of course, that goes both ways--if you're a petty, bitter person, then it probably won't work out.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by parKbench

I feel if you have found true love, more than likely, there will be no reason to break up. Unless the other person doesn't truly love you. If you BOTH truly love each other, you will stay together no matter what. So, you would never have to worry about how to treat them after you break up.

I'm not really sure about that, but then again I can't really claim to have found true love. I do like to believe that if both parties truly love each other, though, yeah. Then again people (and love) can change.

I'm guessing the rest of your post was meant for some other topic because it's not relevant to this discussion in any way.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by parKbench

The rest of my rant was directed to your comment that true love isn't selfish.

Ah, in that case, you're wrong. Every human is both selfish and selfless in varying degrees.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by parKbench

...not in the US. haha, I've yet to meet a selfless person.

So you would say that you are 100% selfish all the time? Do you pay taxes?

I was speaking idiomatically.