Oh God i fell like a fool...

Originally Posted by Crash Landon

Get over it, pussy. If you thought life was gonna be a barrel of rose-scented peaches, then you deserved to get fucked in the ass like this. Here's a news flash: some girls are sluts. Looks like you found one!! If you don't like what she did, shove your hand down your pants, find your balls, and tell her she's been dumped faster than a belly of stool. Don't come whining on the internet about how miserable your life is now and how nobody except Linkin Park understands your pain.

You got played. Quit being life's bitch and move on.

Well I was going to come in and say that, but Crash beat me to it.

Dude, did Jupiter break up with you? Was she somebody's boyfriend? Because normally this type of acid is left to me and Lurker around here.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Crash Landon

No, Jupiter and I are cool. I just went out and bought her some fruit snacks that aren't sold in CA, just to be nice.

I just found this guy's thread to be particularly whiny and decided to strike. The only reason it's usually left to you and lurker is that you two tend to get there first.

Oh, good. So long as everything is still good with you two. What kind of fruit snacks?

Also, original threadmaker:



etc... etc...

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Crash Landon

Florida's Natural Fruit Snacks

She says she's never seen them in California, which would make sense since California produces much of its own fruit.

But the snacks are super awesome. They taste like the actual fruit, not some over-sugared laboratory facsimile.

Huh, never heard of them. They sound really good, though.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by Crash Landon

I wouldn't purchase four boxes for to send across the country and have my girlfriend consume if they weren't pretty tasty.

All-natural too. They're not even BAD for you, unless you're severely diabetic.

Well, no wonder she hasn't dumped your ass like what's-his-face's girlfriend here. Maybe if he showed his love more via fruit snacks, she wouldn't have dated some other dude.

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Crash Landon

Honestly, the way he worded it, I figured that she had another boyfriend first and was only fucking this Roan kid on the side.

So I don't really know what he's bitching about. Chick abandoned her guy for him. Dude's a player and now he's getting all emo.

Although you're right. Fruit snacks would go a long way in salvaging this relationship.

I've always heard snacks are the basis of any stable relationship.

Also, she probably doesn't have another boyfriend. She just didn't like how he was all, at the risk of sounding pom-like, :smalldick:

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by Devoxy

At least you were getting action?

"His dick in your girlfriend."

Owned so bad.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by Spatula

As an aside, that's one of the most adorable kittens I've seen, so sad like that.

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by neus

The kitties Dr. Drunkalis has posted have elicited more of a response from me than this threat of "choling". I hereby request this thread be sacrificed to the gods of Cat. Post more cute kitties.

[/blatant derailment after all discussion has been exhausted and fruit snacks have been thoroughly dissected]

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?