If you want it, steal it!

I remember back in high school, my sophmore year, I had my CD player and my enitre p-funk collection stolen. It was especially upsetting because I had this rare 4 disc professionally recorded bootleg of a George Clinton/Parliment/Funkadelic show recorded in (I think) 82' or so. It was a fuckin amazing show. Somebody grabbed it while I was having lunch. I bet they were just after the CD player, and probably just threw away the CDs.

I remember being on the other side of the tracks too. Whenever a fight broke out, I would be there to snatch any pagers or jewelry that would fly off the ignorant combatants. I never got much, but once I got $50 for a pager. I also remember stealing food from the school cafeteria. The prices were so overinflated, and half the time we couldn't leave the school for lunch, so I felt justified. For all those say it is karma striking back, I got my CD player stolen first.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Ha! I completely forgot, I had my car stolen once. It wasn't the fatmobile, but rather the ghetto mom. The ghetto mom was an 86' Toyota Camry stationwagon, held together by rust. I couldn't lock it up because all the locks were broken. Even the ignition could be started with a screwdriver. To add insult to injury, the thing couldn't go faster than 40mph. So it was stolen, found in the ghetto, missing a battery. How fuckin silly.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by Oric

Oh man. I would cry. No one steals the P-Funk, that's just a sin.

I had my backpack stolen my freshman year. Most valuable things were my Ti-83+ and my CD player with copy of The Wall in it. It was nice not having to do my homework for a few days, though.

Oh god. Now you just reminded me that my entire Pink Floyd collection was stolen in high school too. Why?! Why?! Why would anybody steal Parliment, Funkadelic, and Pink Floyd?! It's... Like stealing a bible from a church!

Blasphemy!

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by Encephalon

See... I wouldn't feel the least bit guilty about stealing a bible from a church. It's like swiping a Benjamin from a bank. You know they have a stash of them in the back and that shit won't hurt them in the least bit.

...wow...

...that's heavy...

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by AliceNWondrland

I used to work at a daycare right after I had my daughter, who is now almost 19. I was married to a complete loser who wouldn't work and I was pregnant again, and we had no food...ever. So I would wait until the kids were asleep at naptime and go into the kitchen and devour as much food and juice as I could in a couple of minutes, because I was deathly afraid of getting caught and I didn't want to be in there too long. One day I went into the kitchen and there was a sign on the refrigerator door that said the food and juice was for the children (of course I already knew that), and that all employees should bring their own food to work. After that I would sometimes go for days without eating, but I would still sneak and drink some juice every day.

I don't hold it so much against her, as the business is the one who is supplying the supplies. It isn't like she snatched it out of the children's hands and ate it. Out of sight, out of mind. I think it is unbelievable being a pregnant woman, having to do what you have to do. The children will all live another day, a fetus needs to grow. Besides, it's better to admit to it, and understand the problem, than hide it for life.

I was speaking idiomatically.