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I bet they do contain Wii demo stations. But one of those crates also contains Reggie. WHICH ONE? Will anyone want to risk their life to find out? WHAT IF THEY CHOOSE THE REGGIE ONE. REGGIE GUARDS THEM. There will be certain doom.
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REGGIE will BURST out of the crate on stage to start the E3 press conference. He'll then turn around and kick what's left of the crate into the crowd, hopefully hitting the IGN section. They won't be hard to find because they're the ones who screamed when Reggie jumped from the crate.
Anything after that is trivial, hopefully they show some game footage.
How ya doing, buddy?