Strangers in the Alps (GFF Settlers of Catan)

Ahahahaha. YES.

Hey, as long as I'm not WHITE again, I'll be happy!

Jam it back in, in the dark.

DICK MOVES ABOUND

I like how you used the signed tile as the desert piece, Hyde. That's a surprisingly awesome and nondick move. That doesn't mean I forgive your original dick move. Ooh no, don't think that your moderator status will protect you!

Aright, going with a settlement on the 5, 6, and 12. My road will goooo... Southeast from there!

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Hmmm.. I'll put my last settlement on the 10, 8, and 2 with my road going southeast!

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

2 Dice Rolls Die #2

Mwahaha.. I'll buy a development card and roll~

Additional Spam:
Hah, I was definitely saying to myself, "Please roll a 3" on my second die!

YA, I'LL TAKE A WHEAT.

Also, I'm going to build off my 10/8/2 settlement road to the southwest, snaking in between the 2 and 3!

May as well END TURN~

How ya doing, buddy?

Mmm.. Oh, how I love those rare rolls!

I was speaking idiomatically.

Astoundingly dick move, Frank.

ASTOUNDINGLY DICK

Additional Spam:
Anyone want an iron for a sheep?

That's.. An IRON.... For a SHEEP.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

2 Dice Rolls Die #2

I had to try!

I'll use my Yur of Plenty and grab a sheep and an iron. Building a settlement on the 2,11, and 3!

Additional Spam:
Oh hay I'll take another sheep~

TURN OVA

FELIPE NO

As much as you'd like wood from me, I have none (for you)!

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

2 Dice Rolls Die #2

Oh my forking gourd. Hey, RASSpy, I hope you can feel my angry glare through this computer screen!

I'm making it my mission to make your stay in the alps as uncomfortable as possible. In fact, I won't even give you the luxury of lube anymore.

Additional Spam:
Oh hay, who wants some of this here wood? WOOD, ANYBODY? ANYBODY THAT ISN'T RASPUTINA?

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I will take that deal, Frank!

And I love them goddamn 2's. With that, I'm finished with MAH TURN.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Yes, Radez, I'll take that deal too!

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I too cannot/will not make that deal!

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Brick, brick, brick for a wheat!

(The Hangover was decent enough)

I was speaking idiomatically.

How about a sheep for a wheat? A WOOD? BRICK!

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

2 Dice Rolls Die #2

Bah! I'll first build a road, then, going east from my 8, 2, 3, toward the 3:1 port.

Additional Spam:
I'll also buy a development card~

IF it's a soldier, then I'll put it on the 9! Otherwise, I'll keep it.

I'm gonna be gone for the rest of the day, so I'll just end my turn now!

How ya doing, buddy?

Rasputin's, of course! Or rather, Rasputin's wheat.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

He's about to accept that.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Ohhaywho wants to give me a wheat for something?

There's nowhere I can't reach.

2 Dice Rolls Die #2

I like that offer, however, I'll roll first so I can hopefully get a third resource to potentially trade!

Additional Spam:
I'm actually gonna wait around until the morning to let Frank (who just gained a wheat) see my proposal.

i.e. Be a nice guy.

How ya doing, buddy?

Ooooor I could just say screw it and accept your offer, Radez (which will probably aid you in your raping of Frank).

Dick move?

I'll give you 2 brick and a wood for one wheat!

Aaaand I'll use my own remaining resources to build a city on my 12, 5, 6 settlement!

I am so done with my turn.

Most amazing jew boots

Happy 4th, and neither do I!

I was speaking idiomatically.

Whoaho! Someone sounds desperate. Honestly, after pondering an actual game plan, I really don't have any use for sheep! I need my wheat man, mah wheaaaaat!

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

MOTHERFUNKER

FELIPE NO

2 Dice Rolls (Cracked) Die #2

I could have sworn I checked this recently~

Additional Spam:
I'll trade a BRICK for a SHEEP or a WOOD

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

I will take that trade, and end my turn!

Jam it back in, in the dark.