NSFW - Serious sex discussion

Yep. HUGE untapped potential here and I do wish for it to be completely serious. I do not wish to see it heading down to sewers though. So lets keep this clean shall we? But if the admins/mods do wish to move it so, I'll be fine with that.

Let me start off on a quite popular topic.

How do you come across the idea of sex and when?

If you could talk to your parents about sex in general, would you?

If you HAD talked to your parents about sex before, is it helpful?

Feel free to share your experiences here and ask questions as well to continue the discussion.

I came across this when at school in 5th grade, someone brought it up somehow and it lead into an outrageous tell-all story about it works (with all the wrong reasons and wrong little facts). But sex then at itself lend me the idea that couples get together intimately to either have love or have kids, as the most basic level of thought I could think of.

I had talked to my grandma about sex several times and she would often say be sure to find a nice guy (quite often... with a good reason... she married a bastard). And I can talk to my brother as well about sex since I am a virgin and he had done it. I asked him about not so specifics like when did he lost his (which his story actually surprised me to no end) and was it worth it with a current gf he has and so forth. But never beyond that. As for sex topics in general with the rest of the family... I found a lot of facts of THEIR lives actually revolved around sex since which still cease to amaze me. o.O' Needless to say... they're just all whores. xD

Anyway... the stuff my grandma told me or my brother told me isn't really all that specific of course. I'm assuming they don't even know either.

Which brings me to this next question. Why is it our own family so DAMN shy when it comes to sex discussions compared to our stupid friends? Seriously I learn more shit about sex from my own friends. And its often WRONG too.

Do you take your friends' experiences at sex with a grain of salt? Or do you let it influence your decisions about sex in general later in your own relationships?

Is your religion a HUGE reason why sex part of the discussion between you and your bf/gf is so prohibited? Or is it the opposite? xD I kept imagining that prudes are outrageous nymphos after they discover pleasure after their sexual awakening...

I'll admit that my own strict christian upbringing was my sole reason for waiting til I got married. Thankfully I had a great guy and I have no regrets. Although... it kinda lost its point when I lost my faith to begin with. However, before we got married, we were quite frank about it and talked about it a lot. Mostly my fears and his as well. But after we got married, it worked out so well I couldn't believe it. I thought I was liberated and really don't feel the pressure anymore to believe that sex itself was a necessity as long as the release/pleasure itself was achieved. THAT in itself gave away for a lot of leeway into having a great bedside manner... :X

And well as for my friends' experiences, lets just say, they're worse than my family. They're young and dumb. I knew better to follow their mistakes.

There ya go. My apologizes for such a long post... hope that helps to start it off.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by dark nation

s your religion a HUGE reason why sex part of the discussion between you and your bf/gf is so prohibited?.
I remain eternally single so most of this question I can't answer.
However, my religious beliefs are somewhat... in a state of flux right now so I'm not really sure I can answer this truthfully. I have not had pre-marital sex, if that counts for anything.

Thanks to Malak and DN for keeping this clean. >.> Noticing Miles checking in onto this thread lol, and don't ya worry, I'll be sure to report a racy post or something to save you from !

Anyway, DN, I guess the question would be IF you got a girlfriend, is your religion a source of PRESSURE to NOT have sex or perhaps is your social culture a pressure to DO SO? I can see it really depends on the girlfriend and how she thinks about it as well. But I'm talking about you though. I imagine you'd give in quite easily under whatever circumstances... o.o' No offense.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Thank you all for good clean replies, much appreciated.

New questions:

To guys: How do you view masturbation DURING marriage?

To women: How do you view your LOVER (ie not husband) masturbating?

I was surprised to find there's a LOT of pet peeves about masturbation in general. There's a lot of women without an education (will source upon request) post high school that did not masturbate. And then in turn, there's a lot of cultures that look down on female masturbation as well as small sources of communicating about it.

To everyone, how do you feel about a woman finding pleasure with herself?

To the previous question, I figured its depend on the circumstances... but I understood even prior to the relationship that I wanted him to masturbate freely on his own accord as long as he kept check on himself. My only worry was that too often the images/content used were progressive in some form and just pray it wasn't heading to negative.

And as for the woman, as a woman, I'm rather surprised. To be honest with you, I NEVER thought its even possible. I heard about it but I figured only with a dick toy or a vibrator or a shower head. o.O' And that's a new thing for me still. o.o'

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Wow, thanks for the well thorough input guys! Keep them coming. Reading from a few of yours, I keep seeing the same result.

Originally Posted by Bernard Black

I have no religion, unless you're of the school that believes athiesm to be a religion of its own. It is no reason to hold me back in a sexual relationship.

Originally Posted by Sassafrass

I have been an atheist for a very long time, so no. Religion never effected my sexual practices. Logic maybe, but not religion. I resent the idea that religion would interfere with my bedroom.

Perhaps it'll help if I rephrase the question whether or not if religion influences your sexual preferences (and I don't mean hetro/gay preferences alone) but rather CULTURE around you. Religion is often a bit more like culture that your own family had taught you since you were small.

I find it hard to believe that atheists don't have any sort of restraint upon sex other than general preferences of their opposites themselves. Does having no sort of basis of faith pushes you to HAVE sex immediately? o.O' That's what I mean.

I guess I'm going for the detail of WHAT drove you to be open about sex in general or rather what didn't prevent you from having sex at all. Is it more of a causal spontaneous kind of thing that you guys just didn't really think about or it was genuine when you love your partner then?

Which brings me to the NEXT question.

Is it possible to have lustful sex when you're in love with this person?

I know this sounds SO dumb, but I realized its kinda impossible to "make love" when I saw that I'm rather kissing my husband to show that I love him so much but when it comes down to sexual pleasure, its more of indulging into pleasure itself from each other that didn't seem like "love-making" itself... o.o' Maybe I'm not there yet to experience this lol!

Even so, I realized that in some insane concepts that a person can love this person so much that sex would appear as a dealbreaker because it would possibly tarnish their image of these said beloved people. O.o' Thus avoiding sex altogether for the name of love? o.O' Such oddest thing but I had heard of it...

But I hope that helps to explain what I'm confused about in regarding "love-making" which is really strange concept to me. If you could, could you help me by explaining it or describing it to me? If too much, you don't have to reply!

Second question, when you truly LOVE this person, how do you display love to this person?

I just kiss my husband a lot... he calls it rape since I pounce on him sometimes. xD LOL. He's hilarious, but its true though, there was NOT a day go by that I wouldn't kiss my husband. That's love to me for sure since its not either pressure or whatever, but a spontaneous feeling of love. I hope that helps explain a bit of what I mean by genuine love displays.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by guyinrubbersuit

Are most women like that, really into kissing? Though I do enjoy giving my girlfriend pleasure in many ways.

LOL I have no clue but yeah for me guyinarubbersuit, I really love kissing. I have a very good set of lips for such action. O.o (Think fish face and NO LIPS face. ETC flexibility of lips.) But that's not what really gets me to kiss him so much personally, I found its HIS scent that drives me wild. Kissing him just brings his scent closer.

And I guess its kinda weird for me to see a line between lust/love during sex because we are somewhat in between since we're still in learning phases.

Anyway you brought up an interesting point about all sorts of pressures to have sex. Is expectation of pleasure a huge one?

For the longest time I was raised to believe that I am the one to give that expectation to the man I marry. o.O'

I was speaking idiomatically.

Thank you for the replies everyone. I appreciate it, and um... I just wanted to learn a bit as well as learning a bit about everyone here. That is all.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?