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Well, in some ways, Etrian Odyssey is harder because of its ample use of bosses that are impossible to beat when you first stumble upon them. This game, at least, always gives you winnable battles.
But in most other aspects, the Dark Spire is the more difficult of the two. Mapping and navigation are far more vague, regular battles are deadlier, leveling is slower, skills are more difficult to learn and have far more subtle uses than Etrian Odyssey's, etcetera.
Etrian Odyssey II and the Dark Spire are both great games though, and I'd recommend the former if you're enjoying the latter. I just think the Dark Spire has a much greater atmosphere.
The best way to figure out where you are after a warp is to look for changes on the map. If a new tile is marked, that's where I am (I'll move forward once to see what direction I'm facing). If not, it means I've been there before and I just have to either use a compass or look for landmarks.
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I would consider Dark Spire to be harder than Etrian Odyssey personally on the note that it's so hard to find my way. (Although if you want to be really technical, DS is easier because of the "Save Anywhere" function.) I know I haven't even gotten deep yet, and since there's so many icons in the legend for the map I haven't even seen yet, I know I'm going to get even more screwed later on.
Which leads me to my next ponit:
I'm well aware of the strategy of checking the map for differences because that's how I initially figured out where I was about 3 or 4 weeks ago. Now that I haven't touched the game in 3 weeks, and all of the tiles are already marked, that strategy is no longer valid and I have to start guessing exactly where I am with the warps. (or use a Compass or whatever the spell equivalent is called.)
If it sounds like I'm hating this game, I'm not. I'm just frustrated that I have to resort to using tons of compasses just because I stopped playing for a bit and forgot how everything goes in something I've already explored. It's only an issue for me because I'm prone to going on-off on most games I play.
I think EO has a stronger emphasis on character customization since, as you've already mentioned, you level up faster. And every time you level up, you get a new skill, which means that even though you might have several characters of the same class, they can all have different disciplines of their class, and could play entirely differently. DS has a stronger emphasis on straight dungeon crawling and exploration, which I suppose is what's expected in such a genre. So if anything, EO is more of a regular JRPG in the guise of a dungeon crawler whereas DS is just straight up dungeon crawling with random bits of RPG elements. Both are fun, but for different reasons.
What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?