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GFF is a community of gaming and music enthusiasts. We have a team of dedicated moderators, constant member-organized activities, and plenty of custom features, including our unique journal system. If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ or our GFWiki. You will have to register before you can post. Membership is completely free (and gets rid of the pesky advertisement unit underneath this message).
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 Member 19121 Level 28.96 Feb 2007 
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Hi Ayos. Is there anyway you might post 'Atlantis' in pdf format? I have a mac and can't seem to load Word files through Appleworks though I'd appreciate a chance to check out your work.
Jam it back in, in the dark.
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Member 19121 Level 28.96 Feb 2007
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Thank you.
Cool. You really get down to business pretty fast! As far as constructive criticism goes, I feel you might be jumping a bit fast into the dialogue without explaining who's who in the opening paragraph. As far as I can tell, it seemed like a character might have been having a conversation with themselves. (This might just be me though) I like your descriptions of the environment and almost feel like I'd like to hear a bit more about it in order to determine the full scope of the world in which the characters are interacting. I also really like how you sum up the story (... and black) casting a bit of darkness and gravity on the premise of it. I'd like to be able to be a bit more indepth with specifics after a bit more reading but I like what I've read so far.  There's nowhere I can't reach.
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Last edited by RainMan; Nov 21, 2007 at 05:02 PM.
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RainMan