Coming out to family and friends

It's good that it's likely few will have a problem with you coming out. If your parents will be supportive, it's probably best to start with them, especially if they might hear from your friends if you came out to them first. If not, I think it's the friends that you have the biggest emotional bond with that should be told initially and less important friends later. It's not obligatory that you tell anyone, but once you start, it's probably best not to stop, because people hearing via others can be a terrible thing. Timing is essential.

I'm not sure if it's possible to 'come out' comfortably, at least at first. It's an awkward issue to breach with elements of unpredictability. Saying 'I'm gay/bi' in the middle of a social occasion is a bit of a conversation killer. Getting people to 'sit down' and saying I have something important to say can be effective, but it still requires the courage to say a few words. At least in my experience, though, it's worth it; the relief in just getting those words out can be immediately comforting and allow you to talk openly about the issue further. That's especially so if you find it hard to be vocal about something major unless the circumstances are right. Basically, I think the discomfort of breaching the issue can be reversed by the relief of getting it off your chest.

I told those that I had an emotional bond with personally, but didn't feel the need to tell everyone I knew explicitly, just the most important ones. I think it's good to sometimes let the grapevine do the talking if you have a friend that is able to tell some people; it saves awkwardness and allows people to settle with the idea before making a response to you (if they make one at all). Letters and email can be effective too and allow you to state/explain precisely; it might seem like cowardice, but if you make it clear why you're doing it that way and that you will be happy to talk about it once the issue is breached, most understand. I wouldn't recommend doing that for all parties, though, obviously.

I came out last week to university friends / acquaintances, largely because I'm on the verge of starting a relationship. I feel relieved and refreshed that I did, even if I only told ten or so people face-to-face. Basically, everyone knows now and it's been a pleasant resolution to many years of anxiety. I told my parents last year because I felt obliged too, but regretted it soon after. However, I now have nothing to do with them and have become emotionally independent. The loss of the family bond does make me feel lonely, but I function fine without it and the rejection has allowed me to let my life progress in the way I've wanted it too. I'm now the happiest I've been, stress aside, and coming out has been a big factor. I don't think any rejection is the end of the world if you have decent self-esteem, though it sounds like you won't have to face that.

Jam it back in, in the dark.