How well do you know your neighbors?

I know all my neighbors and out of 9 houses on the blocks around us, I really only get along with one and that's because he's actually a really good friend of mine.

I mean, just on one street I have a nursing graduate who believes that she is somehow better than the rest of the "poor Mexicans" on this street and rather than move out of this neighborhood to improve her "quality of life" she actually built a house too big for the land it's built on; nevermind that she still lives by...

...some crazy cracker who has probably mugged more people in this town than anyone else and his cousin routinely comes out to visit him with a few cases of Budweiser. They then fire off shotguns in the backyard as casually as one would say good morning.

After him we have this really weird guy who's been on "disability leave" for 8 years from his job () so he just spies on everyone from his front lawn and then gossips to his next door neighbor about the happenings of the neighborhood.

His neighbor is actually kind of nice but I once fixed her computer and we agreed on a price of $80 to fix the thing and so far the only thing she's paid me with is a six-pack of Natural Light cans (which I threw in the trash in front of her house), so I don't really like her much anymore.

Next to her is your standard-issue gangster family. This kid is basically a ricer and an L.A. gangster rolled into one. He removed the catalytic converter from his car (a SIX-CYLINDER MUSTANG with a painted black hood in a pseudo-carbon fiber hood gesture and an aerodynamically enhancing wing that just screams, "I have a small dick so this here SPOILER will make up for that") so it always makes the most obnoxiously loud noise when he rolls down the street listening to Snoop Dogg (I'm not even kidding on this; it's all he listens to) on his even MORE obnoxiously loud stereo. His girlfriend used to be hot and were this 8 years ago I totally would have fucked her but now I'm sure she's anatomically similar to Grand Central Station with a hot dog in the center of the lobby. (She's the local hood rat.)

Next to me I have my cousin. He's an asshole. Let's just leave it at that.

Then next to him is really the only neighbor I like. I've known him since I was 10 and he's always been a really good go-to cat for advice and actually a good role model. This guy is honest, a hard worker and goddamn he just loves to invite his neighbors for little birthday or odd parties he throws for his family regularly. I'm the only "neighbor" that actually shows up to said events. :/

So yeah... I know my neighbors. But I really wish I didn't.

Jam it back in, in the dark.